History - July 21 2021

Festering smiles stitched on choreographed photos, same as the one posted two days ago. Same coloured eyes, now hollow, remember when they sparkled with joy?

. . . .

A decade of friendship braided and twined like thorned roses, both swore oaths as their paths first converged:

"Best?"

"Forever."

Talking as one, walking as one, finishing each others sentences.

Whispering secrets late into the night. Swapping mix tapes every day at school. Thousands of blurry smiling photos taken on crappy digital cameras and posted carelessly, like children do. Long summer nights, campfire stories, candy and crushes. Innocent, with the first tastes of teen-hood looming just out of reach, but that's okay. Faces covered in marshmallow they laughed, immortalizing yet another moment in history with the flash of a camera. Blinded by the light they laughed again, throwing a candy at the other and watching hot embers disappear into the ink black heavens. Disconnected from the busy world (for a moment). Two souls cut from the same cloth mesmerized by the stars in the sky. 

Cusping adulthood, the stories told by children were cast aside, somewhere saved on a four-gig memory card. Relationships yearned for and relationships had were the centre of discussion. Magazines with tips on the subject were taken as gospel, dog eared and passed back and forth. A camera flashed, followed by a lighthearted laugh and a silly face. Sleepovers, breakfast and pancakes somehow wasn't cool, it was all about late nights, Palm Bays and solo cups. Both naive, they walked willing into the pre-dawn of adulthood.  

"Yeah, of course." Was traded for; "Maybe another time." 

Blanket forts, stories of grand adventure and camping trips were reminisced about more infrequently during pinched coffeehouse visits between classes. Glancing at the notebook on the table, it wasn't clear if both yearned for simpler times of writing with gel-pens. Talk of relationships and love had become a private thing, the new horizon was career. Gone were the days of a camera and a phone. Click. "Wait, let me see. No. Let's try again." Click. "Better." the other took the phone; snip, highlight, auto-correct, filter. "There we go."

The subject of moving away bubbled to the surface. The world paused, making it clear the cloth their souls were both cut from was no longer one and the same. Differences of the cloth pointed out, shedding light on the faded threadbare scraps.

"When?"

"This fall."

Weekly calls and monthly visits became quarterly calls and yearly visits. Occasional trips down memory lane produced youthful faces immortalized on the internet. History played backwards with the scroll of a mouse. Nostalgia struck, would their names still be carved on that tree? 

Six more months, another call ending with the only sentence left that they could finish of one another's:

"Best?"

"Forever."

. . . .

Tears pricked her eyes thinking of that last call, scrolling again she stopped at the carved tree. Typing your name she wanted to share that morsel of nostalgia with you. Her heart missed a beat and the tears that dammed themselves, fell like rain. Your name was no longer tagged to the picture. It had to be a mistake, typing your name it wouldn't come up on the friends list or in the comment.

Typing furiously, her page was only half of the whole. 

Staring in disbelief it was as if ten years didn't happen, scrubbed from existence. Wails and cries fell in a silent home. Every stupid grinning picture and adventure, erased at the click of a button. History had no place in your vain world, no harm was meant but her heart shattered that day. 

Walking through town, pain came in tidal waves when a memory of you struck, capsizing her heart like a small ship at sea. Soon the tidal waves lessened, not because she became stronger but because her heart became marooned atop all the shipwrecks before. 

Every picture you since posted had the same come-hither look or false smile, happiness never seemed to reach your eyes.

Your name came up on her call display. Seeing your name flayed a new wound and let it go to voicemail. 

Again you called, this time she answered quietly, wound still ragged at the sound of your cheerful voice. You were stopping for a flight connection and wanted to say hello.

She agreed. 

The beers tasted milky and as bitter as the sorrow in her heart. She tried to be whole as you told her exotic tales of travel and adventure, without her. 

Hugging goodbye in the parking lot she glanced up and the ink dark sky and squeezed her eyes shut. 

Opening her eyes she stood in the forest after a sleepless night. Their names were still carved on that tree. She gave the tree a kiss before picking the dirt out from under her nails and returning to her car. The sun beat on her smiling face on her drive home.

Two could play at that game. 

Best?

Forever.