Emotions

I needed to write this.

Emotions,
confusion,
fear,
hurt,
bouncing off each other,
ricocheting around my brain,
slamming against my head. 

It's like an ocean,
swelling up to swallow me whole in its black water,
drowning me. 

I thrash and scream but the cold, 
black fingers of emotion clasp my ankles,
dragging me down as I fight and twist,
intent on sinking me. 

I can't take it anymore,
my lungs are filled with emotion's water,
making it impossible to breath,
impossible to think. 

I need to end it the only way I know how. 
I can't survive another second,
I need to get out. 

Emotion churns faster and faster,
dumping more and more water on top of me,
I can't see light. 

My lungs start to burn and it's useless to fight,
My throat contracts as I gasp, squeezes tight. 
The end is near, I can see it now,
as tears stream across my face I sink deep, deep down,
desperate to end it all I breath in and drown.

Author's Note

This isn't my best poem but I just needed to get something out. What do you think? What things can I change/improve?

Reviews

[Mark Anthony Games (Hum..]

superb, deserved winner unquestionably!

[Isabelle Faye]

Thank you very much.

[Mary]

Emotions certainly behave like a raging sea, and if one is not mindful, can get swallowed whole. Good write! Effective use of metaphor.

[Isabelle Faye]

That is very true. I'm glad you liked my writing and the metaphor. I often feel as if an ocean's current is tugging me in so many different directions and I can't do anything to fight it, no matter how hard I try. It is determined to, and will, tear me apart, my emotions pulling me in so many different directions that I will never be whole again, not ever. I wrote this when I was feeling swamped by a bunch of different emotions, to try to figure them out I guess.

[Bewitching Sensations]

Very good... i was catching my breath here and there :)

[Isabelle Faye]

Thank you, I'm glad that you liked my poem.

[Bewitching Sensations]

thats ok.. my pleasure

[Poppy]

I thought it very powerful - with good imagery that told the story well.

[Michaela]

Very powerful poem, makes me remember some of my harder times. I commend you for putting your feelings out in the open, I know it always helps me feel better. Great read

[Isabelle Faye]

Thanks, It helps me too.

[Legolas]

Great job! This was really well written with powerful descriptions to boot. Keep it up!

[Isabelle Faye]

Thanks, I wrote it last night if that clarifies what it was about a bit.

[Legolas]

Yes that would clarify it.

[Isabelle Faye]

I thought so.

[Whiskurz]

I don't think you need to change anything.....This was Brilliant....if this is not your best poem then I can't wait to read it......Bravo my friend......Whisk

[Isabelle Faye]

Thanks