Book One: Clarissa

Book 1: The Beginnings

Ever since I can remember, I have been able to understand people on a much deeper level than others. Some call it being sensitive, I call it being observant. Every night my mother would tuck me into bed and say goodnight before heading to her own room to sleep. Little did she know, I would be wide awake for the majority of the night. Sitting up in my bed, I peered out the large glass window that overlooked my yard. Through the dark outlines of willow trees, I could see shadows shift in the dark. Night after night, I would wake up to a tapping on my window or a loud shout coming from the moonlit hills that rolled endlessly into the skyline behind my small, comfortable home. The time came that I started to need answers, and what I did would change everything I knew about life.

I sat staring at my room in the dark. Moonlight was pouring in through my window, giving an odd glow to the scene around me. The clouds curled around the moon like a snake, carefully caressing the orb making its light eerily dim. As I laid my head down again, my eyelids became heavier and heavier and my body felt lighter. I began to drift to sleep, dreaming of a distant world. I was sitting on a boat fishing and enjoying the life around me, and everything became so vivid that I started to believe I was truly there. The birds were chirping, and the trees were more vibrant than I had ever seen. I was completely content. Suddenly, everything came rushing back to me in a swift and cold chill up my spine. An unfamiliar noise had woke me. This time a faint bell in the distance that rang softly from the bushes. I could feel the ring shake my bones as my mind began to wander and scary thoughts filled my head. I sighed, and tried to relax again but knew there was no point. These constant noises never let me rest. A few minutes would pass by before another noise would reverberate through the woods and the cycle would repeat itself. One time a woman's voice singing a soft melody, another time the clanking of metal. I stood up, put my feet on the cold hardwood, and gazed out the window. The world is a much different place when there is no light. Due to a lack of visibility, the other senses overcompensate in order to keep the body safe. Every snapping twig, or gust of wind, puts you on high alert.

It had all started when I was a small child. I think back to how innocent my life was; The most interesting treasures to be found were new species of slugs and beetles living underneath the stepping stones that lead to my front door. The biggest fear I had was my mother coming out and seeing the displaced stones that never seemed to fit back into their original spot the exact same way. I grew up a shy and introverted kid. I kept to myself, and never told anyone about the things I had seen or heard. The most intense memory I had was when I was around the age of seven. I was in my back yard playing on the swings as my mom washed dishes and watched me through the kitchen window. I kept hearing someone whisper to me from the bushes asking if I would come and play with them. I ran inside and told my mother that a little boy was talking to me and he wanted to play. She told me that this was my imaginary friend and that if I wanted to play with him I could. She was always so supportive of me, she knew exactly how to comfort me. I stepped back into my backyard and picked up a toy car and a ball. I placed the car in front of the bushes and held the ball in my hand. I took the ball and threw it into the bush and waited. I could have sworn that there was someone there but nothing had happened. I walked back to the swing and started to swing again. My imaginary friend seemed so real to me, and I had wished he would just come out and play. Suddenly, I felt something hit my back. The ball had been hurled from the bush at my back. I ran over and pushed the bushes aside but no one was there. I didn't know whether I should be confused or scared. Ever since that day I was so intrigued by the different sights and sounds that I experienced on a day to day basis. Now I needed answers. Answers about where the noises were coming from and what they meant.

Thinking about everything that I had learned, I was struck with a sense of determination and adventure. With a bit of effort, I slid the large oak window open. I took a moment to allow my eyes to adjust to the darkness. A breeze spilled in bringing the scent of fresh cut grass and damp earth. The only thing to be heard was the soft chirping of crickets. I stepped through the window frame and dropped down onto the porch awning. With every few steps I took, I stopped and listened closely in order to see if I could tell the directions of the sounds. Jumping from the awning to a tree branch, I shimmied down the tree and dropped onto the black top. The driveway was cold under my feet and made me shiver. I paused again for a brief moment and took in the world around me. The crickets continued their drowsey tune and the wind rustled the leaves in the trees above my head. Closing my eyes, I focused harder, waiting for a noise to appear from the darkness. Then suddenly, a faint giggle made my hair stand on end.

“Hello..?” I whispered softly as I took a step in the direction that the sound had come from. I stared into the forest and waited for someone, or something, to give itself away. As I stood waiting, I began to smell the scent of cigar smoke. I stepped into the woods and pushed a few branches out of my way. The grove was deep and winding, and if you weren’t careful, getting lost would be quite easy. Stopping again to listen, I began to hear music echoing off the trunks of the trees that intertwined with each other like vines. Being careful not to give myself away, I placed every step with caution, making sure not to step on anything loud. The trees began to open up into a clearing, and in the center of the clearing sat a graveyard. An immense willow swayed its long hair-like branches in the center of the rows of headstones. The hill was beautiful in an creepy way. As I stood staring, a breeze curled around my cheek and made me take a deep breath in. Not a cloud in the sky was preventing the moon's crystal-like beams from shimmering down upon the rolling hills. A strong scent of cigar smoke was pushed along with the wind, and my fingers became sticky in the humid air. I watched the graveyard carefully, crouched behind the stone wall that stood as a border around the graves.

Little Richard’s Long Tall Sally played as a beautiful woman in 50’s attire appeared from behind the willow tree. She was a skinny brunette with wide hips and bright green eyes. She had an extremely contagious smile and her hair was curled in loose shoulder length curls. She had fragile, smooth hands that were extremely perfect with nails that were a smooth warm pink. Her knuckles were small and free of any cuts. Her long blue dress reached down to her ankles, and she had a white button down shirt tucked into that dress. Her shoes were a small and black with a large golden buckle on the top to keep them tight as she skipped around the graveyard happily. She smelled similar to when rain begins to fall on scalding pavement. I watched in awe for a while. The woman was extremely beautiful, making it hard for me to look away as she continued to dance through the rows of headstones. Suddenly, her eyes locked with mine and she smiled.

"You're not going to let me dance all alone, are you?" She said with a giggle. Everything about her seemed so genuine and fun. I looked behind me as if she had been talking to someone else, but she extended her hand and motioned for me to come closer. Hesitantly, I hopped over the graveyard wall and stopped.

"Isn't it a little late for someone to be blasting music in the middle of the woods?" I asked as she continued her jig.

"It's never too late for a good swing, my friend. I'm Clarissa. I died over 10 years ago" she didn't miss a single beat as she pranced around swinging her dress to the music.

"I'm sorry, died over 10 years ago? I don’t understand." I chuckled as I tried to figure out what the woman meant.

"Yes, I died some time ago. Those cigarettes sure did catch up to me. I blame that old goat for ever getting me hooked on them. That was just the lifestyle back then though." She turned away, jumped up and hung from one of the low hanging branches of the tree above her head. She swung back and forth, bending the branch beneath her weight before launching forward and landing with a thud and a cloud of dust.

"So you mean to tell me you're not alive. That I'm talking to a ghost right now" I said sarcastically.

"You are, in fact. But only because I'm allowing you to do it. You see, I've been trying to get your attention for a long time, Jordan. I could tell that you could here me." Her words came out so casual, as if what she was saying wasn’t completely ludicrous. She made the experience natural. I stood there with a puzzled look on my face for a minute. The song came to an end and she stuck out her lower lip showing me her sadness. She grabbed the 1950's style radio and played with the knobs until and another song came on. Music made her eyes light up. This time, Chuck Berry's "Johnny Be Good" crackled through the old speakers. The woman began dancing again.

"You see, people don't just disappear when they die. They get to live life however they want. So I choose to be my twenty two year old self that grew up in the 50's! I loved my life then so why not live it forever?" she said as she spun around me in a circle. She stopped for a second and noticed the scared and confused look on my face. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to take in the information I was just given. Was I going insane? Clarissa looked me dead in the eye.

“Listen, Jordan. You have a gift. Everyone in this graveyard has a story to tell. We’re all dying to tell someone what it’s like to die and what our favorite memories are. Maybe if you put your powers to good use, you can help some of us rest easier in our eternal sleep.” she put her hand on my shoulder. Her touch was ice cold like the inside of a freezer. This was no joke, this woman was truly just an energy that I was seeing. Her eyes were striking and bright. They acted like a portal to her emotions.

“Trust me on this. Take a seat in front of my headstone, close your eyes, and try to relax. If you concentrate hard enough, I will be able to show you some amazing things.” She said pointing to a nearby grave. I hesitated for a bit as Clarissa leaned over to change the radio station again. This time “Surfer Girl” by the Beach Boys came on and she began to dance a slow and fluid swing. I sat down cross-legged in front of the headstone and read the epitaph. I checked my wristwatch, which read 1:13AM.

“Here lies Clarissa Marie Moyer. She was a loving wife, a caring sister, and a friend to many. Born: April 13th, 1933. Died: July 8th, 2006.” The headstone was intricately carved with flower covered vines chiseled in as a shallow border. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. My heart was pounding and my mind was racing. I controlled my breathing as much as I could and tried to relax my brain. The music around me started to fade out and there was a sudden rush of air around me. I opened my eyes and I was sitting on the floor of a house. The furniture was old fashioned and looked to be from the early 50’s.

“This is a bit homier than a field full of grave stones, now isn’t it?” a voice came from the kitchen. Clarissa appeared through a set of swinging doors with a smile upon her face. She was wearing a maroon dress with a big white apron. The smell of chicken wafted out behind her as if she were preparing some sort of meal. I stood up and looked out the window. A group of kids were walking down the street with big square metal lunch boxes in their hands.The boys had their hair slicked over and the girls wore long pink dresses. By sitting on Clarissa’s grave, I had been flashed back in time.

“The year is 1956. I'm 23 years old and this is my home. What do you think?” she waved her hand as if she were showing off a trophy or a medal. In the living room, there was a couch and a rocking chair. The couch faced a fireplace that had a mantle covered in picture frames. I stepped over and grabbed a frame to see the picture.

“It's… lovely.” I said with a small laugh. In the picture I was holding was Clarissa and two other girls. They were all sitting at what seemed to be a diner with milkshakes in front of them.

“Those are my sisters, Bonnie and Marcy. Bonnie is married to Dale and they live in the town over. They’re the best sisters a girl could ask for. Dale can be a real prick sometimes but then again that's every man these days. Marcy just graduated high school. She's had her eyes on that neighbor boy for years. We will see where that leads. Pa always tells her that if she doesn't get serious about settling down, she’ll never find a man.” Clarissa slid around the room with a feather duster in hand. She scrutinized every corner of the room making sure that there was no dust build up anywhere.

“Why did you bring me here?” I asked abruptly. “I'm sorry if that was rude I’m just still confused about this whole situation.” She motioned for me to sit down in the rickety rocking chair. She sat down on the couch and crossed her legs.

“Just let me tell you my story. Who knows maybe you will learn a few things along the way. I graduated high school in 1948. Being a woman during this time period really put me into a predetermined role. I was born to be a housewife and nothing more than that. I couldn't go to college because women didn’t usually go to college. After my senior year of highschool I spent my summer going to sock hops held in the gymnasium of my school. It was a sticky july night and my friends and I had snuck down some alcohol from our parents liquor cabinet. My father was far too much of a drunk to notice. We sipped some drinks and walked from our neighborhood to the big lit up merrywood high. It was always such a fun time at these dances. We did dances like The Twist and The Mashed Potato. I’ve never had more fun than when I was with my girls.” her words wandered off and she got a nostalgic look on her face. Her eyes dropped and she let out a sigh.

“Can we go to one?” I asked the sullen woman.

“Just close your eyes for a second and concentrate.” she said with a smile. I closed my eyes and tried to quiet my mind again. My eyes shot open with the sound of a car door slamming right next to my ear. In front of me was a big high school lit up with red and green lights. A pile of shoes sat outside the big wooden doors next to a sign that read “Drop shoes here”. Clarissa grabbed my hand and ran towards the school with excitement in her eyes. She pulled off her shoes and dropped them in the pile. I did the same and we followed a group of clean cut teenagers into a large gymnasium. There was a band playing on a small stage and an enormous crowd was dancing around having a blast. She immediately let go of my hand and dove into the crowd. I watched her appear throughout the crowd spinning in circles and talking to many different friends. She came back out and put her hand on my shoulder again. This time, her touch was warm.

“Man! I just love these dances. You really missed out on a fun time.” she wiped the sweat from her brow and tried to catch her breath.

“Can these people see me?” I asked, embarrassed with the way I was dressed because it was so out of place.

“They’re all dead as well and frankly I don’t think they take the time to even notice you. This is a free world. When you die you can re-experience anything you want that you've endured in your life. Since we all loved being teenagers, we come back and visit the time we loved the most.” her face lit up as the band started up another song.

“I LOVE THIS SONG” she yelled as she grabbed me by the hand and drug me into the mass of people. Just like that, I was experiencing another culture. It was as if I were a part of them and their free spirited aura. They were living life as a generation of confident and strong teenagers and I was one of them. Earth Angel by The Penguins was being played and the group began to slow dance. She grabbed me by the hand and led me across the dance floor with her feet. She made dancing feel natural. It came so easily to me and I began to feel as if the whole crowd was one fluid motion swaying back and forth with the beat. It was a feeling I had never felt before. We were together in a disconnected, but uniform way. We were all one. We danced for the entire song and as the music came to an end she spun away from me. I was now alone in the crowd. I took some time to notice the looks on everyone's face. They were all a pale white, with eyes burning brighter than I had ever seen before. The couples were locked in a mesmerized trance, holding hands and swaying to the music. The bliss was radiating off of everyone and it warmed my soul in a way I had never been effected before. I was at peace. I closed my eyes and smiled, breathing out a sigh of relaxation. It was like Clarissa had said, what a time to be alive. I opened my eyes again and I was back in the rocking chair in Clarissa’s house. She looked at me and smiled.

“Welcome back” she giggled as I clutched the wooden arms of the chair. I doubt I will ever get used to that strange time shift feeling.

“That was… amazing. It felt as if I were in some sort of dream. Everyone was so happy.” I said with my voice trailing off. I longed to feel that way again, as if my body were craving it.

“That’s a combination of the afterlife and you just never really experiencing a fun time. I visit there all the time. This is the home where Dennis and I lived.” she looked out the window as if she were waiting for someone.

“Who is Dennis?” I peered out the window as well and noticed the vibrancy of nature. The trees were thick and a brilliant green. The sky was the bluest I had ever seen before. If heaven were a real place, I believed this is how it would appear.

“Dennis is my husband. He died two years before I did. We met at a dance, actually. I still remember the day perfectly. The way he stared at me and smiled made my heart melt. After that day, it was history for us. We were married within the next five months.” Clarissa’s eyes burned even brighter when she said his name. It was clear that she was truly in love with him.

“Can I ask you something?” I spoke hesitantly.

“Go ahead!” she said with a smile. I wanted to work delicately into the question in case she found it offensive.

“I’ve always been fascinated with the afterlife. Was it scary..? Were you afraid of dying?” I hoped that I hadn’t offended her or brought back any bad memories with my question but my curiosity had gotten the best of me.

“Oh, honey. Dying is like falling asleep and dreaming. Look out my back window.” she pointed through the open kitchen door to the back yard.

“See the cornfield? Funny thing about Dennis was how sweet he truly was. I have never met a more spontaneous person in my entire life. Sometimes, I would wake up at three in the morning to his strong, calloused hands shaking me. I would look at him and ask what the hell had gotten into him. All I could see in the dimlit room was his big smile as he asked if I had seen the moon tonight. In one motion, he would scoop me up in his arms and carry me out back to our 1956 Lincoln Premier convertible that was already idling quietly in the moonlight. Smelling that exhaust in the cold night air made me feel so alive. With the top down, we would fly along gravel paths to a special spot only we knew of. There were a few hills along the edges of the cornfields and one of them had a tall maple on the crest. He would park the car and we would lean against the trunk watching as the stars slowly faded away into an orange sunrise.” talking about these memories made it impossible for her not to smile. She sat in bliss for quite some time.

“He may have been a grouch, but we loved without question. One day he complained of heart pain so we took him to the hospital. His heart just gave out and that was it. I was devastated…”. Her green eyes turned pale and discolored.

“I lived here alone for quite some time. The neighborhood kids grew old, and they had their own kids. I would wake up every morning, kiss my picture of my husband and we would read the morning paper together. Just as we always had. Many tears were shed on that couch you're sitting on!” she laughed in a hurt way, and I couldn't recognize if she were crying or laughing. The room grew cold and the sunlight hid behind the clouds. I couldn’t help but feel the pain of this poor sweet woman.

“Then one day, I had finished making myself dinner and I felt cold. It was so strange because it was a warm summer night. I grabbed a sweater and wrapped it around my old, feeble body. I didn't like being old. My skin looked like a dried out leather couch. Life was such a bittersweet thing. I looked out the back window at the long driveway and pictured my sweetheart mowing the back lawn. He would have loved a night like that. The crickets were drowsily humming in the tall blades of grass, and the moon was shining its shattered light through a single oak tree that sat on our farm land. It was a full moon, just like he had loved. I turned away from the back yard because I actually began to choke up. I missed that old b*****d, more than anyone would ever understand. I walked into my bedroom and sat down on my bed. I looked at the empty space in my bed that laid untouched since he had passed, and said goodnight. I then laid down on my side and pulled the blanket up to my chin. I simply couldn’t chase away the chill. Within minutes, I was asleep” she turned and looked me dead in the eye. Time had seemingly stopped again as I had become captivated with her story.

“Death is like falling asleep, Jordan. I woke up to a strong gust pushing through my window. A storm must have rolled through and I was being blasted with air through the open window. I got up to shut it and stopped dead in my tracks before reaching the window. That smell. It smacked me harder than any deja vu I had ever had. The smell was unmistakable. It was car exhaust from a classic car. I peered out the window, and a 1956 Lincoln Premier convertible was sitting idle in the driveway. My heart began to race. I was confused, but unusually calm. Suddenly, a chill shot up my spine as I heard the back screen door open. I was in no position to fight an intruder, nor did I have a weapon. Then a voice rang from the living room.” she was on the edge of her seat.

“It calmly said… ‘EXCUSE me. I hate to barge in so late at night… but have you seen the moon tonight? It's quite beautiful’. My heart fluttered as a tall, handsome figure stepped into the doorframe. It was Dennis. I asked him what he was doing here and ran over and embraced him. He whispered ‘I’ll explain the details later. Let’s take a ride for now’ and he took me by the hand. I must have been skipping down the front steps because I was so happy to see my long lost love. He put the car in drive and paused for a second. He told me that we were going on a long trip, and that I should trust that he was going to take me on an adventure like nothing I’ve ever seen before. I felt just as alive as I had when we had first gotten married. The chill was gone, as were the aches and pains. From there we drove, and we never looked back. Before I knew it, we ended up back in my driveway. We’ve been here ever since, and that is why dying is like falling asleep. Before you know it, you’re already in heaven with your loved ones. All your aches and pains are gone. Pure bliss.” she stopped to catch her breath. The sun shot through the open window again and warmed my left leg.

“I understand. This is what it’s like to be dead then. It’s no different than living. You can go where you want, and relive memories. You can set the scene you want to live, and visit your grave.” I was slowly piecing together where I was. My head throbbed because of all the information that had been thrown at me. Clarissa stood up and smoothed out her dress. She looked me in the eye again for some time.

“Telling my story makes me feel so alive. It makes me feel important again, like im not just some skeleton in a coffin. Thank you for listening. For what it’s worth, you helped me rest here. I can finally rest easy. I know the others buried here would want to talk to you too. I can’t make you do anything, but if you ever want to chat just come to my grave and whisper my name. Close your eyes, focus, and then open them. I’ll be there. I can give you guidance… I can tell you things about your life… and that's all I really have to say” she leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. A shock went flying through my body and her green eyes beamed. I was single handedly giving her life by listening to her story.

“When you’re ready to go home, just close your eyes and focus.” she winked at me and slid through the opened kitchen door. I stood up from the couch and looked out the window. This world was so vibrant and amazing. I stared for what seemed like an eternity, taking everything in. Heaven was even more amazing than anyone could possibly conceive. I turned to the kitchen and it was empty. Clarissa must have been off in another one of her memories. I closed my eyes, clenched my fists and focused. My hair ruffled a bit and I heard a loud gust of wind. When I opened my eyes again, I sat crossed legged on Clarissa’s grave once more. I checked my wristwatch and it was still 1:13AM. After all that time I had spent with the strange woman, no time had passed. I held it to my ear to see if it had stopped. A soft ticking came as a shock as the watches hands were operating normally. I felt very peaceful. The vines carved into Clarissa’s grave glowed a subtle green. I stood up and felt off balance. The night was clear and quiet, but my head was spinning and I felt weak. I turned back to the thick woods and started the journey home. I was drained and ready for sleep. Becoming light headed so quickly caused me to trip over my own feet. I fell to my knees and a branch tore a hole in my pajama pants. I gathered myself and pressed on through the thick grove. I came to the tree outside my window and looked up. I pulled the big blue trashcan my family used for garbage next to the trunk and stood on top of it. I climbed up, jumped onto the wooden awning, and slinked through my open window. I laid down in bed, pulled the covers up to my chin, and immediately fell asleep.

That night I endured one of the deepest sleeps I had slept in ages. I woke up energized and my head was clear. I stood up and stretched, feeling great. The sun was shining bright through my window and I walked over to look at the beautiful sunrise. The sun shot its warm rays over the rolling hills and into my squinting eyes. I could not help but wonder if last night had actually happened. Everything seemed so surreal that I had a hard time believing it myself. I turned and walked down the large oak steps that lead to my living room. I was met by the smell of eggs and bacon as it seemingly curled around me and pulled me faster towards the kitchen. My mother was standing at the stove with the radio on.

“Good morning.” I said quietly as I sat down at the table. My mom turned to me and smiled.

“Good morning Jordan! Did you sleep well?” she slid a plate of eggs across the table to me. I stood up and grabbed a fork from a drawer.

“Actually yes, I slept really good. I haven’t had a sleep like that in a while.” My voice trailed off and I stood there still thinking about the night before.

“What did you do to your pants?” my mother asked. I looked at her with confusion.

“What do you mean?” I looked down and inspected my pants. There in the right leg, was a small tear across my left thigh.

“Oh… that… I got it caught on.. My dresser last night.” I lied. She looked at me with suspicion and then shrugged.

“What a shame. Those are nice pants. I will try to sew them up for you” she said as she turned and walked into the living room. I sat back down at the table with my mind racing. The tear had happened last night while walking home from the graveyard. The proof was staring me in the face. It had actually happened.

Reviews

[MuteB912]

An interesting idea. You have very beautiful descriptions but they seem to take over the story and really slow down the plot. I suggest you tone down your descriptions a bit. As tempting as it is, it's best not to try and describe every intricate detail to the reader. Doing that can cause the reader to doze off/lose focus. You also have some repetitive description in your story. When describing Clarissa's physical appearance, You already showed the reader that Jordan thought she was beautiful, so stating 'she was beautiful' to the reader is unnecessary; however, I do like how you show the characters' personalities, especially Clarissa's. Very nicely done. You do have some minor grammatical errors but those can easily be spotted if you go back and examine your writing. Now, I have a few points I need to make on your dialogue. You have quite a bit of noisy taglines. Noisy taglines are used after a character has said something. Some examples:
"Do you want some pizza?" Clark asked.
"Yes please." Jenna said.

Stop poking me!" Johnny snapped.
"Make me!" Tina teased.
Snapped, teased, said, asked, are all noisy taglines. They're not necessarily bad, in fact, there are times when you need them, but the last thing you want to do is over use them/misuse them because they can become distracting and break the dialogue flow for your readers. You generally only want to use a noisy tagline if it will give more insight to the readers on how the characters are speaking. For example:
"Do you think they can hear us?" Beth whispered.
See, here, the noisy tagline is okay because we are showing the reader how Beth is speaking. Since the reader can't hear her whispering, it's proper to tell the reader that's what she's doing. Certain taglines like asked, said, exclaimed, etc. are all basically repeating what was already said. In the first two examples, the reader already knows that Clark was asking a question because of the question mark. Same thing with the word 'said'. The period shows that Jenna simply stated that, yes, she would like some pizza. What I like to do in order to avoid noisy taglines (though again, they're still fine to use in some situations) is to just describe the body language of the characters. It helps bring them to life and it's fun to use in certain situations in dialogue (like if a character is telling a lie, or they secretly have a crush on someone). I encourage you to play with that a little bit. It's fun! Also, you want to avoid another form of an obvious noisy tagline. When it's clear that a character is doing something like flirting, lying, etc. it doesn't need to be stated after the dialogue. One last thing I have to say is to make sure you indent the beginning of each paragraph so it's easier for your readers to read. To sum it up, you have a good story idea going for you, but I would encourage you to go back and edit it a bit. Thanks for sharing your story.