surviving survival joy alive

this dark hole 

once built for survival

made amends

suffering

thought I deserved

 

see the sun

disappearing behind clouds 

see light glimmering 

out of the cracks 

made to build a new foundation 

tore the old one down with an axe

 

sew new clothes

planted new seeds

rooting 

in fertile ground

 

gone is the corpse 

called home for centuries

gathered all the bones 

burned them in the woods

buried the ashes 

planted a tree 

 

growth 

comes out of loss

 

once black and lifeless  

green and pulsing

blood through my veins 

unfreezes 

black ice 

red liquid

heart pulsing 

woken up from stiffness       

so known 

 

frozen 

when I heard the beating in my body 

again 

stillness rotating in it for ages 

 

transforming into a rhythm              

once lost 

hearing universal sound 

discovering new songs 

chants

sound of music alive 

translucent notes 

floating around 

 

yet unseen 

not in a haze 

in soul and spirit 

 

cages I built 

unessential metal 

turning to dust 

 

faith in building

dreams arising 

out of the residue.