I've accepted this

Heavy downcast eyes
Beaten and bruised lips
Deep setting melancholy
There’s nothing more tormenting than aiming and shooting for a brighter future only to find that it’s the past just wrapped in different casings

I’ve accepted this. 
I have nowhere else to go other than the bottom of this bottle
I'm only going to make the same mistakes
It was wrong to view myself as the grapevine growing through the rose thorns

I am not words of beauty
I am not of love
I am not the space between us

I am my mistakes. 
I am my mistakes wrapped in gold foil
Trying to seem as if I have learned and changed, for the better, what the point of a story without a redemption arc?

I haven’t given up
I haven’t died out 
I haven’t gone away

I’ve accepted what I am.

Author's Note

Its full of boring self pity but thats what ive been feeling. let me know what you think!

Reviews

[Victor Warui]

It is not self pity, I would call it self analysis. At one point I realised what I have become is from my mistakes.... Though sometimes future is a projection of the past, the poem has a unique way of giving hope to fight "I haven't given up...."
That's all that matters..... I love this poem.

[light and ashes]

You shouldn't accept that. It is not the extent of who you could be, regardless I did enjoy reading this poem.