A Love Story [TWO]

As people started getting out of their seats and talking loudly to their friends across the room, I realized it was recess. I looked back at the scoring table; she was still there. Moments ago I had been daydreaming about a dream about her. And now she was just standing there. I picture a scene in which some coma patient awakes suddenly to find his lover right beside his bed. They're both so happy to see each other. He jumps out of bed, she's crying tears of joy, and they embrace. Roll credits. Just another little fantasy.

 

When I came back to reality, she was no longer at the scoring table, but instead talking and laughing with her friends, probably talking about something trivial. I could never understand why girls always travel in packs. One of them started giggling really loudly and pointed at another guy in class, tuning his guitar in a corner. He was the popular one. I watched as the girls all stole glances at him, smiling as they pulled her towards him. She was blushing such a bright red but it only made her seem even cuter. The girls now sat around the guy, obviously playing some kind of joke on my girl.

 

My girl. I had written that by accident. She was obviously not my girl. She was smart, pretty, and beautiful voice. Not beautiful in the sense that she sings well, but I would talk nonsense on the phone with her for hours just to hear it, it wiped my brain blank. She had no reason to settle for a guy like me. No reason to even notice me. I was just another one of the 7 billion humans on earth, and she was my goddess. My goddess; I had done it again. Typo. Even as I said it in my mind I knew it didn't make sense.

 

She's just another girl, surely you stand a chance? 

 

No, another little voice said. I have nothing for her.

 

Go ask her out, what's the worst that could happen?

 

I'd embarass myself. Besides, why would she even go out with me?

 

Why wouldn't she?

 

I thought about it. 

 

It was true in a way, why wouldn't she go out with me? I've been her best guy friend for a considerable time. At least a year. I could just ask her if she wants to go out for a movie or dinner. Just like in the movies. I've been out for a movie and dinner with her before. But not alone, you haven't. said the voice. Does it matter? It was essentially the same thing.

 

But I knew then how much it mattered. I won't share her with anyone. I want her for only myself. I want to be the only one to make her smile, to listen to her problems, to wipe her tears, to comfort her when she was sad.

 

My girl.