I'm Fine

I'm Fine

I don't know how many times I've been aggravated, angry,

Don't know why I'm always pissed off or upset,

Maybe part of the reason is because I'm bored, low, even troubled,

I'm tired of feeling blue, insecure, tired of being sad.

I'm not fine all the time with feeling annoyed,

God, it hurts so bad when my heart is in pain,

I'm tired of being this unhappy,

I'm lying when I say I'm not at all vexed.

My entire life I have been baffled, confused, rejected,

Deep down inside I am depressed, glum, feeling unwanted,

And I can’t begin to explain why I am so down, sick, or neglected,

So, yes this makes me irritated, offended, and outraged.

How do I get over being bitter, hateful, insane?

When I'm discovering that I have been forgotten, outcast, stressed,

Left trying to figure out why I am so distressed, heartbroken, and scared,

Feelings are never what they seem when I'm so tired,

After all of this, I will utter the most used lie and tell you, I'm fine...

  9/14/2017

Reviews

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

Yes that’s what most of us do everyday say you’re fine but they aren’t- facing the truth and the feelings inside is the start to self- acceptance and healing without aggression pain and irritation- peace can be found within if we trade it out spiritually- flesh causes confusion- great words🌹

[Ghost]

Thank you for reading and leaving me a nice comment

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Well maybe let her in life is too too short forty one day nearly sixty the next time flies whilst thinking too much or worrying too much a thing I’m guilty of let she who wants in if u like her

[Ghost]

We are actually working on it and talking and we think there is a good chance... Thank you for your thoughtful comment

[Pscanlon123]

i enjoy the sets of 3, i feel they emphasized it very well. the feelings you put into it were very relatable. A very honest and good poem

[Ghost]

Thank you for a nice comment on this write... It makes me feel good to see all the comments

[Kay]

Gosh, I felt the pang of pain with every emotion in this piece. The way you listed them in sets of three really emphasized it. I think it's very relatable, the way you express the feelings of hurt and our compliant tendency to lie in response to "How are you?". I think part of us expects the other person won't genuinely care anyway. I remember I tried this a couple times; someone would ask how I am and I'd say "quite stressed" or "very tired, I had a rough day" and the other person continued talking as if I hadn't said a word. I might as well just have said "I'm fine". It's unfortunate and your poem explains it exactly.

[Ghost]

Sorry for answering your comment so late, my laptop has been down... Thank you for such a wonderful comment on my poem.. I agree sometimes people don't listen and only care about themselves... Thank you again

[barleygirl]

This is one of the best poems of yours that I've read so far. I love the way your expressions are so plaintive & honest. You use imaginative word choices, many series of dynamic verbs to convey the intensity of how this feels. Sometimes I thought your poems can be a little too crafted, even tho your word crafting is always poetic & graceful. Here you are taking a different approach, expressing yourself in a raw way that has no contrived artfulness to pretty up the way it comes across. I find that being raw & honest is much harder than being artfully crafted. Your overall message hits home, something we all do, & we all accept as an answer even when we know it's not true (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Ghost]

Many thanks for the nice comment and the constructive thoughts on this write.. I appreciate that thank you again, Ghost (Earl)

[Cherrie Palmer]

That is a deep groove a repetitive loop that you must cross over.

[Ghost]

I am sorry it took so long to get back to your comment... I know I am trying to beat this loop thank you for commenting.

[Cherrie Palmer]

You can, one small decision at a time.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Your poem and it’s important message are excellent. Great graphic, form, flow, cadence, eloquent use of language. Like a drumbeat, a drone punctuated with stark, staccato self-deprecating words- it shoots straight into a gentle heart. You write such a poignant lament, such a questioning self-castigation that is familiar to me and to so many of us. We hide our feelings, our true selves. Someone broke us along the way. But hidden beneath is that bright light that shines, that loves, that creates- that redeems us. I see your light Ghost, and I thank you for it.

[Ghost]

Thank you so much for such great understanding.. I find I hide myself away from two important people, myself and the lady who is my muse for all of my love poems.. But I do see a light and I know it is within reach.. Thank you again for reading and leaving such a nice comment

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

True true true
It’s easier to say fine sometimes

[Ghost]

Yes it is... I know all to well as I say it to the one who wants in and I keep her at bay..

[Laurierose]

Cathartic yet reserved, if possible. I loved the outpouring of emotion here. The tone seems very weary. Though I see that you've felt outrage with the lie, there's as if there is a long sigh in there somewhere, especially the ending. I believe we've all had to paste on a lie because it's what's familiar to us and acknowledging true feelings is where the real work begins. Great read.

[Ghost]

Such good understanding.. Yes I know we all have at one time or another had to say "I am fine" to someone... And yes I do get angry because of the lie I say, because all I want is to be fine...

[Neville]

Now that is what I call spooky...I was not expecting that amazing ending at all, well done you my friend and sincerely hope all is not so bad as the images you initially created in my minds eye.......All Very Good Things to ya Ghost.............N

[Ghost]

Thank you Neville for reading and leaving a comment... I often feel this to much to not know the feeling...

[Neville]

I fully understand.....my pleasure...take care.....Neville..

[Coyote Poetry]

Sometime easier to say we are fine then to discuss why we are not. A realistic poem shared Ghost. Few people show real face. Because few people truly care. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Ghost]

Thanks Johnnie for reading and commenting... Go back and blow the picture up I used the words in each letter in the four stanzas...

[Coyote Poetry]

You did well and you are welcome Ghost.