dream scars

I had a dream that 

My scars had reopened. 

That I was bleeding again,

That I could see into my body,

That it was rotten and septic and 

I did not know what to do with it. 

What does this mean? 

Does my subconscious know that

My problems are resurfacing?

Is it trying to warn me? 

I am not in the same place I was in

All those years ago, when those 

scars were not yet scars. 

I may be having very similar 

External conflicts at this moment,

But I am mentally not the same. 

I recognize my own strength,

I’ve grown to realize I have power 

Over myself and what I do-

But now I’m back to being 

In a childhood bedroom.

Im back to being spoon-fed lies 

And gagging on the foul taste. 

Back to being told I am weak and

I feel weak, because nothing I do 

Will ever change or affect the situation. 

The difference is that before, 

I felt helpless and that 

everything was out of control. 

But now, I am being forced into 

A helpless state, and I know 

Everything is under control. 

Someone’s control,

But that person isn’t me. 

I had a dream that 

I looked down and saw 

Severe gashes all along my thighs. 

Like a ladder from my hips to knees,

There were muscles and bones 

Visible inside each and every rung. 

Perhaps there was a truth 

That was trying to climb its way

All the way back up to my heart. 

I still don’t know what it was trying

to tell my sleep-deprived self. 

All I know is that it didn’t hurt,

And I was not scared of it. 

Did I somehow expect to be broken again?

Maybe I am like a puzzle,

And I am trying to 

Rearrange all of the pieces. 

Perhaps they just did not 

Fit together right the first time. 

Reviews

[Unspoken poet]

this is a wonderful intriguing write, enjoyed

[Lathen Griffiths]

I liked your poem ‘Dream Scars’ a lot, (such a unique title BTW). The complexities of dreams are totally baffling, how the mind works to process all the stuff that happens and that we see and hear is intriguing and your poem captures that wonderfully.

Best wishes

Lathen.