My Animal Totem

about the animal totem that we all can find for ourselves.

For me it's not the mighty Lion, which is my birth sign, but the humble squirrel. And the first time I saw this in a meditation where I was asked to recognize my animal totem, and when I saw it was him, my ego said no, no that can't be. But a little while in just 20 minutes later when I walked out of the little house on the river in Lava Hot Springs I notice a big squirrel sitting just off my path back to the motel I was staying at. And he spoke to me, he was saying something like, so why, why could you not accept me, is it because i am small, what is it? Just last weekend I went to the mountains to try and figure out why I had gotten into this slump, where I did not want to get up in the morning for work, and my energy was really low, and I could not figure out what was going on. And there were so, so many people up in Big Cottonwood canyon after I got to the turn off for Doughnut falls I went about 100 yards with the other ants on the trail and then veered off on a little trail and when I came to a few people on there I just said, there are so many Human Beings here, and I just headed up vertical on the mountain, following animal trail and down trees for a few hundred yards up and I came to this huge log and sat on it. There was this sound of things falling on the ground, it was squirrels up in this 70 foot tall fur tree, and the pine cones they were getting seeds from were falling about every 1/2 minute, and there were squirrels all around me, coming right up to me, and I was listening for there messages, when they would come almost right on top of me then notice me and stare at me.