Growing Pains

Coming through a bit of a difficult time, but I'm making, I'm shaking It.

I just came through a period where I was letting things get to me to the point I could not hear them for a while. I missed them so, and I wrote on one of the notes in the Fire on the full moon, that I wanted to hear them, and to get back to writing more again. Well, I am so glad I am hearing them, of course I'm speaking of the Ancestors. About three years ago, poems started coming to me, and one day I heard them say I should call myself Healing Star and that my work should be called Healing Passages. And I've only modified that slightly and they are okay with it. My work is Healing Passages: Whispers Of The Ancestors. One of my favorites is "Holy Nation: Ancient And Young". It is about the Ancestors coming to us the Young Ones today, they are helping us to bring in the New Day, the day of Peace, the day of Change, the Day of a Whole New World that we are creating, dreaming now, and the Ancestors are just as much a part of this as we are. They have lived it all before. Open your Heart to them, they are trying to speak with us all, to help us all, and we all hear them in our own way if we just open to them. I don't hear them like I do people in a room, they speak without words, it is subtle, well sometimes not really so subtle for me now when I'm writing, but especially at first. It is usually impressions for most people and you need to pay attention, try to be aware of it, be open to it, allow it to come to you. But anyway I'm so glad I came through it, so happy to be hearing them again, feeling of their energy, it is a comfort to know that they are always there, just like God they are always there, I count on them, I trust them, and they trust me. Their energy moves through me, their understandings come to me, sometimes when I am writing they just come in and write and I can just kind of watch it happening, it's hard to describe it in words, but it really is amazing. Someone once asked me why do you think they came to you, and I answered I have no idea as a tear came to my eyes and my voice cracked. And he said to me it is because you are the Beauty that they are. That someone that asked me was DZAR - channeled energies of compassion of the universe come to help us remember who we truly are. We happened upon Mary and Gary O'brien in a Art Gallery in Sedona when all the galleries were closing and we were invited in to experience this channeling that we knew nothing about. You might say a coincidence - but I would say it was by design of the Universe. The next day on Bell Rock - sacred site I started writing Holy Nation: Ancient and Young - and finished it the next day. It was by far the longest I have ever worked on a poem in the last three years. I am now nearing 600 writings and 90 percent are poems. I think I'm at about 590 poems right now, so I'll probably hit 600 this weekend - another amazing milestone that I have been blessed with. They are all gifts of the Universe. May you be Blessed.

About 2 1/2 years ago, I woke up one day really sad, it was not long after I had been listening to some talks by Eckhart Tolle, especially the one about the fish in a fish bowl. If you ask the fish what is water, the fish would swim around all confused, thinking and thinking and would come back and say I been trying to find this and know what it is but I have no idea what water is, he is so immersed in it, it has always been there, but he cannot tell you what it is and he cannot find it.  This is like us and instead of water, the water is love.  Well, through Eckhart I saw my illusion self, and I realized after I thought a while that the reason why I was feeling sad was my illusion self passed away, and it was like I was in morning for that illusion self, for all my life it was all I knew myself as.  Well, now I am thinking this time I just went through is partially at least do to another part of my illusion self passing on.  About a month ago, I decided to make a big change within myself to let go of something that has been an escape for me for years, or at least so I thought, it was a way I felt better for many years, a way I felt a part of a group for many years, but also a way that denied me many blessings, and over the years there were many long years that I did not use this escape, but I would always drift back to it sometimes after about 6 or 7 years of not using this escape, or what I saw as one.  And so I think it is feeling a loss of this part of me, I'm a little nervous about this too, will I stay committed to leaving this behind for good, or perhaps again maybe even after years again drift back.  A little worried how I will be without it forever, will I be the same.  Well, no I won't be I will be better, I will be more my true self, so there is no reason to be nervous, see how Ego is trying to put a little doubt in me, just a crack is all he needs, and he knows it.  Blessings to you, blessings to me, I'm blessing you, hoping you will bless Me.