To my Muse.

A Story by Chaos

I was lying in bed after making love and I stared out the window. As my lover listened to my words and fell off to the mystical world of dreams, I continued talking and remembering my time in the woods. As my mind drifted back to the glorious time of peace, introspection and calmness, I started thinking about the fall and why I loved it.

I love it because of the touch, smell, and the site of it all. If you can imagine with me for a moment. I will try to take you with me on a journey of a moment in my life where I was alone with my thoughts, but not alone in the room.

After making love, my body was hot, but cooling down from the passion that once consumed me. As my breath slowed down and my mind was stepping away from the twists, turns, peaks and valleys of pleasure, my thoughts were quickly interrupted by the sharp cool air of the wind entering his window like a thief in the night. The wind stealing the last remaining warmth of passion that was waving through my body. A passion we embraced, owned and created together just moments ago.

I felt the cool wind graze over my body like a hand caressing my skin with ice. mmmm it felt good to be shaken and aware of my reality once again. As the wind caressed my naked body, I pressed my body against my lover for warmth. As he pulled me close to him, I felt the wind trying to come between us and it was denied. The wind with it's rejection decided to drift over and around us and I relaxed.

I looked at the window with it's blinds drawn. I couldn't see outside, but I could feel the coolness of the autum wind and my mind began to drift with the path of the wind; left and right until I could see clearly in my mind.

At that moment, I could see myself walking down a path covered with leaves, rocks and dirt; naturally. I could hear the dried, forgotten leaves underneath my feet.They sounded like percussions filling my exitstance; snare drums to be exact; swish, swish and my feet created the rhythem and nature was my melody. Nature and I were creating the beauty of the moment together and it felt good.

Again, the wind touched my face and sent a chill through my body erecting my skin with it's touch. It made my minds eye look up and see the lonely leaf, lingering on the silence of a single branch. It dangeled there helplessly at the mercy of the magnificence of the wind. It swayed and was tossed to and fro, but it held on.

I wondered, did it hold on for the hope that summer would return ? Was it holding on because it was afraid to fall? It was then as I visualized and maybe it's because I too was drifting off to sleep, but I could see the wind push and pull the leaf until it couldn't hold on any longer.

The limb broke. The leaf fell steadily in a circular motion to it's fate of the death of summer and the rebirth of winter. It lay on the earth, in my path as a symbol of another time gone past; like me.

As I looked at the lonely, listless, little leaf, I moved my direction to avoid it. Something inside me said let it go and I did. As I did (let it go), I could breathe and breathe again and as I was staggering in and out of sleep, I once again gazed at my lover and listened to him breathe. I began counting his breaths to make sure I could feel and hear the rhythem that only sleep can give. His quiet breaths and the cool hands of the fall winds sung me to sleep; dreaming of the forest that I missed so much.

© 2008 Chaos

Author's Note

*note*. these are simple words coming from a simple heart. Thank you for the person who allows me to talk so freely without judgement! You know who you are.