I think that in ways it jumped around, yet it still kept this cute rhythm. Like is was meant to jump to add effect :) I liked reading it :)
Always enjoy your work. Absolutely beautiful
I like it and I dont feel that its jumpy. However I do feel as if words are missing that would help connect the lines with each other. Thats all I have to say about the structue of the poem. With that being said I did enjoy the poem and the meaning behind it. Good work.
Hmm, I have to agree that there seems to be some missing content in that the story didn't seem to flow. With that said; I can say that there is a lot of good in this piece where it seems to say that love has to be worked for. I really like how you brought around the ending.
The piece is jumpy, and the subject seems to be dancing around. The continuation of the quotations makes the conversation seem jumpy and almost as though the reader is drunk. There feel as though there are words missing, and in some places, there are too many words, which flow a little strangly. Read it out-loud and see if you can pin point a few of the issues.
The subject matter is nicely done, and the emotions are well conveyed.
I liked this, although I felt as though it were jumpy subject wise, it was good. The material was touching and I like how you speak as though this person can't believe them because they don't have emotion towards what they are speaking of. Overall I liked it. Keep up the good work.
Oh wow! I'm really touched by this poem, it has so much soul and emotion put into it. I could feel the punch into my soul of how well you put emotions from inside through this poem. Wonderful write!
Ok i am a male , English is my second language, so it's hard for me to give a fair review sometimes, so dont expect a lot..
i am a sales manager and, had this attraction to writing more..