your
world crashed unto my ocean's depths thrashing
in wretched luminosity's mediocrity floundering
to breathe in your obscenities, objectionable
metaphor's intended pity greetings
at irony's gate of inconclusive apathy, hypocrisy's
baptism in chanted pretense wiped
your feet on welcome's mockery mat, shut
your own door as the house of cards played a
familiar sing-song of Pharisaism's pretended pious, ace
up the sleeve in blowhard's pontificating pretentious
poohed in double entendre's denial fatalistic
frippery of academic gloss threatens
to reveal stretch marks in your platitudes, imbecilic
renderings of verbal surreality
shoe size hardly fits your mouthpiece's blitz, betray
intentions of a p***y-whipped obviosity mastery
of bated self-stimulation started bolting when
the gag ball was bitten too hard on, solitaire
sighs pouts and twiddles its thumbs in
a bout of truculence awaiting the arrival of
a new deck to replace the one whose
kings and knaves are glued together, cocky
as the king of spades when
you force your own hand cash
in your chips at the door when
you call someone's bluff, one
had better come up trumps a
few cards short of a dick, there's
always a joker in the pack plastic-coated
poster boy of free speech in
a world drowning in the bubbles of
misguided semen shot down, in
a quest for diction in direction double
meanings split like horny atoms in
a triple-X divorce orgies
of misogynistic linguistics, are
just a left-handed mouse click away
ok, my cranky pants pulled up to my neck... "stupid people never "get over it" because "it" is stuck up their arse so far they can't see beyond their own egos... or is that "dongs", but I digress... er...
Ok you two "bad arse peoples" I think each lines points to his "master... fingers selfie" while dreaming for being "gods gift to , well, himself!!! cause noone else will have him, even as those well know seconds... Oh I can prettry cranky when my pants are drawn up to my neck...
Frieda, Steve, you rock and roll and this poem is sooooo damn irreverant that I heard this was why religion was invented.. here is just one (minor) example: "orgies of misogynistic linguistics,
are just a left-handed mouse click away
unfairly arranged split strong suits
results in polyester cartooned burbles" Hot Damn, nothing more to say.. end of story... I love the both of you MUCHLY which is hard to do with cranky pants on you know, so cut me a break for not reviewing this poem earlier...
lastly though, and in all seriousness... honest.... can I get a hollar lulla, praise da jesus with a "a few cards short of a dick,"... amen please!!! This last amen is for all the "D"heads who think they're intelligent... ~~~ red(hashiscrankyassvindictivepantson)zone
Posted 10 Years Ago
3 of 3 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
If I could stop laughing I'd respond to this, your review is muchly more entertaining than the poem... read moreIf I could stop laughing I'd respond to this, your review is muchly more entertaining than the poem. haha.....just the image of those crankypants pulled up high...get over it Curt. Thanks so much, you made my night sweet man!! MWAH! xo :)
10 Years Ago
LOL You have officially cracked me up my friend....I'm really not sure how to follow that up except .. read moreLOL You have officially cracked me up my friend....I'm really not sure how to follow that up except to to say how glad I am that our shameless foray into irreverence resonated to deeply with you...boy did we hit a nerve ;) Most of the lines you have cited here came courtesy of Frieda, including the 'amen' line haha Her cheeriness is infectious as you can see...and I'll probably get the evil eye from Mrs.R for saying that, but I'm sure she'll be fine ;) I'll leave the rest to her, I'm sure she'll be highly entertained by and appreciative of your most enthusiastic review...thank you my friend :)
Whenever you two get together I am always left in a word coma. Which is the only good kind of coma I can think of. I loved the deck of cards theme in here, I expected it to just be a single reference, but you stuck with it throughout, and it really made things work. There were a million brilliant lines in this piece, but the one that smacked me hard in my mind's face was this:
orgies of misogynistic linguistics,
are just a left-handed mouse click away
It sang to the feminist in me. Kudos to the both of you for creating another collaboration masterpiece.
To carry on with the tone and timbre of this delicious double entendre'd (gratuitous apostrophe for Freida) rant, who pissed in your communal cornflakes to inspire this? ; )
Well written, both of you.
Posted 10 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
You crack me up Noel! Caught this on live feed, and still laughing my arse off. :)
10 Years Ago
Haha Let me just say that I can barely taste the milk in my cornflakes anymore...thank you Noel :)
Should've known but true first two words in the title hat this was a collab between you two. Very nicely done as per. Your pens merge when you write. So many lines I could pick from to be honest, fantastic smart poem.
Woah..this one goes like a multi-barrel gun on loose in the hands of most artistically dangerous people causing mayhem in all directions. What an experience reading it...keep collaborating and destroying people's perception that they have already seen the best :)
i didn't have a triple X divorce, just triple divorces...
the pompous poet spouts...the hypocrisy runs swift like the current of a river...
and you two blend like one fast moving wave...
well i have to run now, guys...i have a liguistic orgy to attend to...vowels optional.
oh "the few cards short of a dick"?
Tammy played the hand before i had a chance to say it.
Posted 10 Years Ago
2 of 2 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Ha 'linguistic orgy'...oh my, how does one get an invite? Jazz'd you liked that line jacob.
10 Years Ago
Haha Frieda wins the most iconic line award for this one, and deservedly so, it's probably my favour.. read moreHaha Frieda wins the most iconic line award for this one, and deservedly so, it's probably my favourite line in the entire piece as well...thanks so much Jacob.
I love the energy and pure sass in this one. It is so much fun! There are so many great lines, but I most especially love the allusion to the deck of cards, better play with trumps, etc. Brilliant and awesome! Great job, you two!
If you want to know me, read my poetry, it's all in there. I am a mother of three sons (my finest moments) a sister, a survivor and a little bit crazy. I lost my beloved sister to suicide, so you'll.. more..