Biblical farce

Tried to drink your sentiments out of my bed

   still I long'd for you in my thought-laden head,

      chanted in braille verse to my vowed resolution

            written on empty coffee foam's contention

                  in conflict's diversion of indifference,

hostility's warnings pen'd on the dotted line,

   pulled the trigger in Russian roulette's toying mind

      wedded bliss but a myth of yesterday's yearning,

   you were never there, now spare me

                         the empty poetic promises,

dissed in disillusioned, dissolution, distributional destiny

    manifestations of a higher power demoralized,

 dematerialized in human emotion's obsolete conjecture

            'let no man put asunder', a biblical farce...

                                                'So what?'

Author's Note

captcha - reaward

Reviews

[Rene Salinas]

There is feisty involved on this, better not cross the path of this feeling. Lingering male issues from the past unresolved although apperently in retrospection he wasn't even there to begin with. All empty promised and make believe then. Isn't it a wonder that you would feel that level of frustration? To turn the page and create a new space , For the next maybe? Maybe not but what is clear is this time there will be no pulling apart.

Thankyou

[Frieda P]

My muse was feeling all feisty, not where this one started out, but landed with a big thump, thanks Rene.

[Baby Ricochet]

I think the entire book is a farce

[Glen Yumang Manese]

The usage of the tone of language in the plot lines...I see you used your favorites...that I see often in your work...Braille and Russian roulette...are two...the sequence of this verse...you do not let go with the vindication of what's on your mind...the last four lines do give this a tongue twister with barrage of "D" words:

dissed in disillusioned, dissolution, distributional destiny
manifestations of a higher power demoralized,
dematerialized in human emotion's obsolete conjecture
'let no man put asunder', a biblical farce...

'So what?'

but may be that was the point...to get the feel as you break this to the ending...and the cliff note in the finale...

[Troy Henson]

The song worked so well Frieda:)

This has a sting to it...said promises left scattered and unfulfilled as though they are worth nothing more than crumbs on a dinner plate. Nicely done

Troy

[gabrielle]

Promises especially made in the state of bliss are meant to be broken...Let this piece serve as a warning. Truly feisty write, Ms. F!

[Rita L. Sev]

The promises made on a wedding day are so unrealistic... of course, only 'man' (kind) can tear apart each other, in spite of those lace-covered forever words... Some great metaphors in this one, Frieda.

[Sean Allen]

Well, after I was able to stop the annoying music, I calmed down and read this. very well done Frieda, and I was most impressed by the use of rhyme is the beginning of the words as in the Dis's.... and the De's.... Don't know what they call that in Mr. Keating's class, because we tore those pages out. "chanted in braille" is certainly proof that the piece was inspired however rather than generated by an instant poem App on an iPhone. Not getting the Biblical part, but I'm not quite focused at this moment.

[Lydia Shutter]

Once a marriage has imploded, it is impossible to remember the reasons why the couple loved one another to begin with. Wedding vows be damned....sometimes it is not meant to be no matter where it has been sanctioned. I especially liked this line, "Tried to drink your sentiments out of my bed" but it is seldom that easy, is it? There is a sense of empowerment in this write, Frieda....a "I am gonna save myself" attitude...that I liked a lot. Quite the video you chose to accompany your words! Great work. Lydi**

[Damien Thibodeaux]

And might I add, disconnected and dissatisfied? Drinking may not work, but it at least dulls the pain. I loved the words, "chanted in braille." Great use of metaphor. I had to let that sink in. Your poems reflect your complex individual idenity. That's what I love about your work.

[Laejeon]

This play with words would wake me from sleep anytime,
love it

[Zakari Schmidt]

Distributional destiny, that was amazing. Honestly, kinda gave me a shiver. So glad I read