~Life in abstention

_“If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.” Mahatma Gandhi

  hung your suicidal smile around our necks,

   branded the skin, tucked it in shirt pockets

took a leap off the ledge of abysmal distortion,

  sucked the marrow from the bones 

                   of shattered bystanders  

choking on the bloody tears of life in abstention

   dripping in assimilation's destined antagonism 

feasting on the afterlife's apocalyptic rewards

   remaining ashes scattered on epic wind's archives

        as bookmarked collectible's blinded keepsakes

written in braille contrition

                    of recall's token heavy heart 

Author's Note

Reviews

[AprilRN1210]

Holy Hell... this reached out and punched me in the gut... I am honestly speechless.. This one hurt... Makes me want to reach out and give you the biggest hug ever... seriously.... so powerful and intense... the pain sears into our soul and brands our hearts forever leaving us to choke on our tears and blindly try to rustle through the ashes to find our way out of the black hole that we find ourselves in.. but that light is up there, may not seem like it sometimes.. but it is... damn... this one hit me hard... sorry still reeling over here ma'am...

[Frieda P]

I've been pretty much speechless the past few days, add insult to injury and this is what happens. Thanks so much April, I knew you'd fully understand where I was coming from. xo

[AprilRN1210]

I can only imagine... throwing gasoline on burning open wound.... and....unfortunately I do girl... you punched me hard... powerful dark magic in this one.... ((big squishy southern sassy hugs))... come on... lean in....

[Frieda P]

Oh good, I could sure use one of those, does a southern iced tea come with? MWAH! xo

[AprilRN1210]

duuuuuuh!!! but be careful... I might've spiked it... lol
but the disco ball is in the trunk.... the rabbit is on the hood and the dirty bird is spinnin the tunes in your absence.... might wanna fix that before he is yakkin in your head again....

[Frieda P]

Doh yourself, I was counting on it! I'm chuffed with the disco ball, the dirty birds, not so much...haha

[AprilRN1210]

lmao.... hatin' on the dirty bird... fine... he's fired... get your butt on the cd player then ma'am... rock me a tune... make it SASSY.... and I know you were.. uhhh hello.. great minds....

[Frieda P]

Ha it was fine the first few times, after 50 it was way too much & starts to grate on your nerves ;)

[AprilRN1210]

awwwww... it still makes me chuckle... guess, I got more patience for the bird...

[Frieda P]

Patience is a virtue I don't possess muchly. .....

[Ashira Macy]

This is just incredibly heart breaking and I am sorry you are feeling this so much lately. Suicide is an awful thing. The people who feel pressured by life enough to take their own lives are beyond being able to comprehend how others will feel after they are gone. A very dear friend took her life years ago when I was in high school and it was absolutely devastating, and more recently a family member tried to. It leaves scars on everyone they touched. Just know that we are here to support you if you ever need to talk.

[Avinash]

This is a song of after life. Not sure how to confirm but soul says it must be like that wherever it is.
Love it when you write for her. Making us feel how unlucky we are not have come across her.

[Latifa]

as bookmarked collectible's blinded keepsakes
written in braille contrition
of recall's token heavy heart

brilliant peotry, I love the images your words paint in the reader's mind

[MAC]

a brilliantly expressive piece, sad yet very honest

[Einstein Noodle]

i don't know what to say .. and if i did .. i would not know how to say it .. :( and Robin Williams is gone now ... your poem is very powerful
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"written in braille contrition"

and those who silently suffer, eventually leave us of their own accord...

life is about honesty, and being honest with oneself...and as Dan Hill sang...sometimes" the honesty's too much"

a very moving poem...after reading the Balm piece, i have come to this one...wished i had read them the other way around....the other poem soothes the pain that is writhing in this one.

[Nusquam Esse]

This was difficult for me to review; the emotion in this was palpable, and I felt so much from it. I don't even know if I can discuss something like this... for me, suicide itself isn't the tragic part, it is being in the point of your life and/or mental health, that it seems to be the only or best action. It is much more complex than people make it, and it isn't just the act of killing oneself, but rather the years of self-loathing that culminate to that moment... and then the years that follow in which people try to understand. ugggh, point is, you hit me in the feel goods, with something so personal. As for the writing itself, you continue to show that you are a master of unique, tactful, and invoking imagery and metaphor. I love every line in here, each holding some subtly that twists at the heart and mind. Despite how hard this hit, this is one of my favourites from you.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Sometimes suicide is not even intended, we just let go of ourselves when we feel all is lost and finds subliminal ways of killing ourselves… a hard gripping poem with a dramatic punch.

[Rita L. Sev]

I generally keep focused on all that is good in Life, but this past week has had me looking through very dark glasses... the difference being, I suppose, that I can remove those tainted glasses eventually. The pain that prevails for those that are left behind... a smorgasbord of regrets and if onlys... Frieda, you make us feel along with you.

[Lyn Anderson]

I don't really have the words to review this one. Only someone who has been there truly gets it. A long time ago I thought life wasn't worth living due to the bullies I endured. Luckily I woke up. Two people would not be in existence if I had made that choice, and who knows what the implications would have been for my family. I have lived the broken trail left by suicide too long. I try to understand but I can't, and instead I just pray to pass through the pain when it hits me. As I recently told Noel, suicide is a b***h that just keeps on giving. Done. HUGS xo.