This poem captures the music in words, which is no easy feat. I am glad you included the music along with your poem, it was great to see your thought process in an otherwise thoroughly sensual poem. The visualization was great; the almost giddy babble of eloquent words and phrases such as "rhythm of sun's betrayal". This line flows so well and ties in with the feeling of a flower waving and bending under the hot sun in a field.
I won't try to over-interpret it, because to figure out the poem's meaning to a T would be to destroy it, but even without meaning it is a beautiful read. Great poem, every word was almost tangible.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you so much for such an in-depth review, thrilled you enjoyed.
Picturesque quality amalgated with lyrical character -this poem is a beauty to behold.. took me back to the romantic age of poetry.Magnification of your thoughts when the flower withers under the scorching heat of sun and finally falls to be buried in the soil..I also guess it may have some deep underlying meaning too- like transient life which withers away in the sands of time.. Lovely work Freida ;)
~Sophy
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thanks for such an animated review Sophy, muchly appreciated. :)
A very melancholy vibe to this, especially coupled with the song. Some really nice lines, especially the sun's betrayal -- such weightiness to this line -- one thing, with your apostrologic, should essence'd be essenc'd or just essenced ?
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Snagged! Thanks KL, how did I ever live without you before? ;)
Amazing! Your words are filled with soft and clear images that really wrap around the reader in my opinion. I loved the line with the word "dither'd" =) It reminded me of how a turkey might feel knowing it's going in for thanksgiving dinner.
I like how you wove music and tone into the piece too. It really brings across the feel of some lonely place in the cracks of society, a feeling of isolation and age expiring, the heat of the summer beating down with the water dried and away, not wishing to play with that small little plant.
Thanks for sharing!
Hugs! - Kate
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Ha turkey part made me laugh, thanks so much for your lovely thoughts Kate!
This poem captures the music in words, which is no easy feat. I am glad you included the music along with your poem, it was great to see your thought process in an otherwise thoroughly sensual poem. The visualization was great; the almost giddy babble of eloquent words and phrases such as "rhythm of sun's betrayal". This line flows so well and ties in with the feeling of a flower waving and bending under the hot sun in a field.
I won't try to over-interpret it, because to figure out the poem's meaning to a T would be to destroy it, but even without meaning it is a beautiful read. Great poem, every word was almost tangible.
Posted 10 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
10 Years Ago
Thank you so much for such an in-depth review, thrilled you enjoyed.
If you want to know me, read my poetry, it's all in there. I am a mother of three sons (my finest moments) a sister, a survivor and a little bit crazy. I lost my beloved sister to suicide, so you'll.. more..