~Exhaled whisper'd whirlwinds

I drank in your desire, 

glimps'd in adoration's gaze

exhaled the whisper'd whirlwinds 

       of untamed memories past

    release in your heartfelt sanctuary,

        retreated on the horizons 

                  of transparent clouds

      nestl'd upon lofty sanctum's skies

 ecstasy 's moon collided onto lucent stars,

                 diaphanous sentiments of soft caresses

           feather'd embraces of Ero's empyrean bliss

    spirit soared on exquisite 

                  vaults of heaven's rapture

Author's Note

Reviews

[Jack Wolfe]

Ecstasy('s) moon collided onto lucent stars, (did you mean lucent, it fits the stars perspective but better as luminescent) and then 'onto' seems a bit jarred, perhaps into.

I found this to be quite enthralling, though short, and the rhythm and omissions seemed right it was just the one line, I am in no way a poetic expert, so this just my opinion . . .

[Frieda P]

Lucent is shining and translucent, I preferred it, Tomato Tomahto ;) Thanks for your thoughtful review Jack...

[Quinn]

Flows beautifully and really shows emotion. Very well written with a good sound track behind it to match.

[Frieda P]

Thanks Zoe, jazz'd you enjoyed this one...

[Sophy Freebirds]

Ooooh!! I can feel someone moaning there.. ;) ★winks★ the raw and hot emotions when you find your other half,it just takes a burning touch and a heated kiss to realise and -spirit soared on exquisite vaults of heavens rapture... the state of ecstacy well painted
~Sophy

[Frieda P]

Was it that loud? ha ha....thanks Sophy, what a special review! ;)

[Sophy Freebirds]

Nope.. but i have highly developed olfactory senses. Lol.. ;) it was a pleasure

[Moonie]

You have wrote something amazing here. Love the aliterations and the way it flows. "Transparent clouds"--Lovely phrase!!!:))

[Frieda P]

Thanks muchly Moon, I'm so thrilled you enjoyed this one. :)

[Kelly Scheppers]

"ecstasy 's moon collided onto lucent stars,
diaphanous sentiments of soft caresses"

...dare I say this reads like something from the 19th century! Wow, this is writing I aspire to!

My best,
Kelly

[Frieda P]

Wow yourself, thanks so much Kelly!! I'm smiling like a school girl here. :)

[moo]

This poem is breathtaking!!! It's just beautiful!!! :,)

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much moo, interesting pen name. :)

[moo]

Thanks :) I like cows :D

[Frieda P]

Good choice then :)

[redzone]

Wanted to write a book about how this poem made me feel Frieda. I did actually but ripped it up..lol. so let me ditto the review that Shirlena wrote, she said it well... and perhaps add only that so much can happen that fills a human heart when 2 "exhaled whisper'd whirlwinds".. you sank my boat with this poem, and I loved getting wet!!! ~~redzone

[Frieda P]

Sank it? I was hoping to float it Curt!! :)

[redzone]

Well those whirlwinds were rocking me and I thought you were in the water and so I was happy to get wet... ;0)

[Frieda P]

Ha okay I get it, like a lifeline.....

[redzone]

Yes!! But Frieda, one of us better save the other or we're gonna be in big trouble HA... ;0)

[Matching Socks]

Dripping with love and sensuality.
Where can I find this? Can it be this way 24/7?

(It was, before the darned kids came along)

[Frieda P]

Ha, if I only knew....thanks, but what would you do without those kids?

[Matching Socks]

Well. I'd have a lot more money. That's for sure!
But they're worth every penny.

[Frieda P]

I hear ya....wait til they get older!

[Einstein Noodle]

heady hearts float on the notes of clouds ... what a wonderful poem .. and you mixed it all up with the Celts .. so very pleasant to read!
E.

[Frieda P]

Grazie mille E, glad you enjoyed sweetie!

[Ayushi]

I could feel the soft and passionate love from the very first line..
You are too good at this :)

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much Ayushi :)