Crush'd

Crippled teardrops ache

relief drips crimson pools

fragile heartfelt moments

buried deep within damage

misery rages in aged flames

afraid to breathe in fire,

scars affect hourglass time

dying in the anesthesia

cuts deep to the bone

annihilating freedom's tomb

killer instincts in sorted rush

bitter taste upon the soul

cold truths' pithless shivers 

strangers bared in rhyme

blood cours'd through cursed veins

crushed 'tween hung tooth'd denial

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

I enjoyed this play of words because it speaks of the way unfortunate memories seem to alter our perceptions in life while hardly bringing up an example. Just an outright expression for the way it grows within us, and how the emotions amplify with time. Your reference to strangers in the end intrigues me, though. Is it so that the strangers are actual strangers who indulge each other's memory, or is it that they are two strangers on opposite sides of the spectrum crooning the same tune? Nonetheless, well done, friend. Keep it up

[Frieda P]

I had the thought that sometimes strangers see our pain before those close to us do Tai, thanks for picking up on that one....always enjoy reading your thoughts.

[Saddam]

outstanding part of sorrow and pain...
Love this one.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much Ssadd, muchly appreciated...

[star73]

its very good well written.

[Frieda P]

Thanks muchly star.

[s y e]

// misery rages in aged flames
afraid to breathe in fire,
scars affect hourglass time
dying in the anesthesia //

Wow, wow, wow. I think you crushed me with this poem. This is spectacular and speaks volumes! You took me away with this one.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much noodlebumble, always jazz'd to get a wow from you sweet pea.

[Einstein Noodle]

you are a wonderful artist ... your presentations are always blended ... this one is particularly moving ... for anyone who has had the "cutting" brush their life in any way your poem lets the pain out all by itself ... tho everyone suffering pain can easily relate you have expressed something dark that yearns the light ... Norma makes fun of me when i see, hear or read something striking i put my hand to my mouth to keep my breath from being sucked out completely (like a little girl she says) :))) but that's what " Crush'd" did to me ...
E.

[Frieda P]

Wow, thanks...now you took my breath away E....tell Norma to mind her p's & q's, obviously she doesn't realize what effect poetry has on the lot of us tortured artistes. Grazie mille my friend!

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you young lady! or "go raibh maith agat bhean óg" apparently the Irish need more words to say things :)
E.

[Frieda P]

Geez do you know difficult it is to find an Irish translator, and not so young...ha, go raibh maith agat an oiread sin mo chara, fíneáil ;-)

[Cassie]

This one I have to shelve, you did take me with you here. I love your pen

[Frieda P]

Grazie mille Cassie.

[Robert Strzalko]

I'm not sure what this was about but a strong feeling of pain came through. It makes me wonder what caused so much pain.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much for reading Robert. It's complicated.

[Lyn Anderson]

This is beautiful, with a great flow, rhythm and timing. However, to my ear, I have a tendency to want to say either "dying in anesthesia OR dying in the anesthetic" - but maybe that is just the vet tech in me.

[Frieda P]

I didn't mean it as true anesthetic obviously, more as general loss of senses, thanks KL. So clinical you tech's. ;-)

[timthy]

have to mimic Antonyo's review...loved your profile...carpe denim....seize the jeans

[Frieda P]

Ha the jeans and whatever else you can get your hands on, thanks for the visit and review.

[WE]

truly a dark image that speaks volumes loved the song choice

[Frieda P]

Thanks gracey, much appreciated.