Echoes of your stare...

I drank from your cup of darkness

     my lips turned cobalt blue

the shadows whirl'd engulfing,

   your piercing eyes pour'd into me

there was no taste left for breath

i lie gasping, waiting for a miracle

   only thing i could hear,

      was the echo of your stare.......

Author's Note

Reviews

[redzone]

"the echo of your stare", great line to end this poem Frieda.. I would say back away from that"cup of darkness", but probably too late for that huh.. I don't think there are miracles for these shadows, just our own resilience and the help of friends who would shout Breathe Frieda, Breathe.. one of those wonderful poems you write that tears at our hearts... ~~redzone

[Frieda P]

No hope for the darkness, now you tell me, I'm fook'd. Thanks curt, always appreciate your thoughts. Are you ready yet sir? ;-)

[redzone]

remember that song "Anticipation"?? well that me.. all nerves and silliness.. the real question is and will always be.. "ARE YOU READY FOR ME!!!! this is way too much fun Frieda...

[Ahena MK]

there was no taste left for breath
i lie gasping, waiting for a miracle
only thing i could hear,
was the echo of your stare.......

wonderful read!!!
101/100 :)

[Frieda P]

Grazie mille my friend!!

[gabrielle]

this warn me not to ever take a sip on the cup of darkness. very haunting frieda but beautifully penned as always.

[Frieda P]

Ha yeah best to keep away from that stuff, thanks gabrielle....

[Leslie Philibert]

Read both of the poems that you sent me, and enjoyed both.What I like in both poems is the mixture of endstops and final enjambment, in this case the longer last line that contrasts to the other shorter lines. Well done.

[Frieda P]

Many thanks Leslie, always appreciated.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A haunting piece of dedication to another told in tones of the blues my Lady!

[Frieda P]

Thanks John, jazz'd you enjoyed!

[Kylie]

Stunning Frieda - Just like I said.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much Kylie.

[Pryde Foltz]

I drank from your cup of darkness
my lips turned cobalt blue

Nothing is sexier than aloof. Great one, Frieda.

[Frieda P]

Grazie mille Pryde.

[m.s.early]

Skilfully crafts the bitter taste of darkness and its intoxicating affect.

Lips are blue when deprived of oxygen, our life source if you will. Certainly sipping darkness will do that.

You make it so surreal by blurring the senses. How love and lust and madness displace us. I fear I've been violated, left abandoned and trembling on the floor.

[Frieda P]

Wow that's some effect, thanks xavier, couldn't ask for more......

[kublakhan27]

Ah we're all waiting for the miracle to come, aren't we Mrs.R? ;P Some of us just have that look...a stare whose echo reverberates for miles, or years...we'd do anything to win that person's eyes, if just for a moment...

Another slice of seductive goodness from your pen my dear friend...I envy that pen ;P xo

[Frieda P]

Doing the happy dance, was it Cohen who got you here Benji? ;-) We always are, yep...thanks dear, you've been sorely missed. ;-) xo

[kublakhan27]

Haha Nah just trying to channel some of his charisma ;) I've missed you as well my love :) xo

[Tam Warink]

This one exudes a sort of translated and rotated kinesthesea, Frieda. It seems about surviving (or not) another... or maybe it's just about "the darkness."

[Frieda P]

Always surviving Tam, thanks for your wonderful insight, always.