After submergence...

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

Survivors astray in the ocean, you having pulled close to rescue the loner now learned the tragedy of your mistake: that despite the calm demeanor, a person is still capable of ripping apart a titanium boat to shreds. What entices me is that you wished to be split open, as you knew your vessel contained precious cargo... Yet the initial damage inflicted by tearing apart the vessel rendered it incapable of floatation, which resulted in the treasure sinking and you realizing the person was not human, but a creature that thrived off the mercy of venturers such as you. But, the creature made the decision to linger among the debris.. and you, as the victim in need of help, only look upon the one responsible with indifference, hence the deep breath. Perhaps you expected it because you ventured so cluelessly into dangerous waters.. or perhaps you expected retribution for past sins. How compelling.. How enticing.. How poignant.. I quite enjoyed this, and the complex tale told in between the lines of the poem.

[Frieda P]

I quite enjoyed reading your review Tai...always a pleasure to have you on my page.

[ms. barrie]

This is a very compelling, emotional write, evocative of one conscious of being
Aware of drowning into the very depths of the wounds upon their heart, yet
Their heart still yearns to open up to once again give love, hoping this time,
Will receive love, unconditionally.

Exquisite poignant imagery your words captured in this write.
Your gift for words, Frieda...is truly astounding! Thanks for sharing :)

[Frieda P]

Thanks for this glowing review Barrie, muchly appreciated. :-)

[wordwarrior]

Oh Frieda this is really clever! Your talent never ceases to amaze me. The metaphors and imagery you use are always so strong and perfectly placed. I think I have more of your poems in my library than anyone else!
This is sad and stunning.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much wordwarrior!

[Michael G. Smith]

So you take all down to the depths like a sinking stone. Are you a Siren of the deep reincarnated? My ex-wife was.

[Frieda P]

Think you misinterpret this one Mike, or that's your own which is fine too....

[Michael G. Smith]

I thought this was a person submerging themselves in another's life?

[TL Boehm]

once the levy broke it took all warmblooded survivors. Formidable.

[Frieda P]

Thanks Tam....

[Ruth]

You can place me in a storm or sunbeam...you know...always a pleasurable dance through your work love xox

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much Poppy. xo

[Leslie Philibert]

I like the way Frieda use very few commas in the first verse, the crazy I suppose gives it a nice converstational felling too, before the slight change of mood in the last verse.,like this.

[Frieda P]

Thanks Leslie...

[Misery]

and the playwright finds a theme…
and her troupe of actors takes the stage…
Eccellente, cara signora!

[Frieda P]

Grazie mille Misery.....

[Rita L. Sev]

"this chambered heart is made of titanium..."

Incredibly strong, but difficult to break through... Great imagery, Frieda

[Frieda P]

Thanks Rita.

[icelandicblue]

perhaps, there's more to this element,

the nature of drowning's decent

gingerly takes another breath

These lines are the jewel of the poem. We struggle and struggle to reach the top, even when it appears to be futile, still we try. You've written a poem of perseverance.

[Frieda P]

Thanks so much Anne, jazzed that's where you went with this one my friend.

[Pryde Foltz]

Drowning in slow-motion, chilling metaphor.

yet, still you linger without a preserver in sight...

perhaps, there's more to this element,

the nature of drowning's decent

Very nice.

[Frieda P]

Thanks Pryde.