Hollowed Soul

A hollow stippling of a soul in the breeze

    hiding in the bushes of perilous vexing

there are days when the wind howls

    whispers darkly  at the ominous night

 feel the chill that passes through 

           dances coolly on pressed eyelids

                   floats tepid beyond the senses 

             know it's the emptiness that comes

        right before realities' disenchantment

Author's Note

Reviews

[Travis Gibson (poetic h..]

Wow... that sat with me, we done!

[wynn]

I love this.............I have been feeling this for so long.....morning and evening becomes a blur as you worry into the midnight darkness....

[TL Boehm]

right before reality's disenchantment. This one is sad - and it has a chill to it. A bit of a poetic distance if you will. Its hard to be saturated with emotion and still write chilly but you did it and you did it well. Brrrrr.
Love this.

[Einstein Noodle]

should be published thinks i. wonderful command of the language. packed with emotions and the deep. last two lines are a train wreck about to happen. no power to avoid it. i like this a lot! thanks for sharing.
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i see a double meaning for "soul" here...

the spiritual soul, but also the idea that we have soul...like motown kind of soul...like something deep inside us...and if we do, we feel the emptiness and dissolutionment stronger than most...
we are affected...deeply.

you write this essence so well, Frieda.

jacob

[Foxemerald]

The scenic beauty provided speaks to the core of this piece of poetry. It thrives on the slipping words, meandering out from this bone-chilling piece as though it were itself the picture that you have crafted of 'soul.' I get the image of the spirit, or the soft, and unrevealed soul that is yet undescribed- I wonder if 'soul' is in actuality the essence of our dreams? Perhaps it is what makes poetry. I think that it is hard to image him as a realist. But, who knows . . .

[ShelleyA]

Hi Frieda. Elegant verse. A lovely write and skillfully crafted free verse. Excellent presentation. Vivid visuals that any reader can appreciate. Smooth flow and tone with deep expression of emotion. I especially like these two lines:
"there are days when the wind howls
whispers darkly at the ominous night"
I sense in these lines sadness and discontent.
Well penned. Write on!

[icelandicblue]

A great use of sensory images. Those senses as pleasurable as they can be also leave us open to the devastation of disillusionment.

[emmajoy]

If only we could bottle pain and disillusionment then drop it into a vast nowhere. Your words are so powerful in their sadness, weeping for arms to hold and protect; words that touch others who are too helpless than just be here for you. ' .. feel the chill that passes through .. ' tis how it is.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Richly intense... life has many defining moments good and bad and a dark epiphany can feel like your epitaph but there is always life after death(metaphorically speaking)