~Fierce Hush

there's a fierce hush aloft my heart

it flew the wings of love until~

the promise inside crashed and burned

now all i can do is play the saddest tunes

the sounds are haltingly wry

as if butterflies escaping certain death

as they flutter by your stark indifference

Reviews

[David Scott]

I can see this magical butterfly. Trapped insde a building of expectations and approval. She should be wild and free. Landing only to drink in fresh nectar and finding her way to a "home" that is a natural draw to all who share her "kinship". It is the weight of us all that she carries that leaves her to "flutter" on the floor of unlit hallways. Ah, but with the slightest breeze through the smallest window, she will feel a "fierce" longing and be born again to the clouds of her purpose. Let her rest in the "hush" intil she feels that welcome and know it is her calling. It may just be the rest she needs to fly to her highest reach.
Loved the write Frieda. You pull the words out of my own heart.

[Frieda P]

Hey David, I truly appreciate you from the bottom of my heart, but your review shouldn't be better than my poetry! Geez, what I meant to say was thanks so much, you're awe inspiring in your responses. xo

[David Scott]

Again Frieda, your words are the wings that carry the hidden thoughts from my mind. You inspire dear.

[KAOlmsted]

That last line knocked this one out of the park...awesome.

[Frieda P]

Thanks the kimmmer, I kind of like that one myself...

[KAOlmsted]

It's a pretty fantastic line...always my pleasure ;-)

[InsanityWriter]

Wow. This is great, I love it. :)

[Frieda P]

Thanks Insanity :-)

[Baby Ricochet]

I like the last two lines best

[Frieda P]

Thanks Baby, I like the last one myself too.

[Blue Ivory]

I love how you used a light color to make it feel like a "hush". It feels all hollow. Like sad whispers floating around...I really love this!

[Frieda P]

Oh I'm delighted you picked up on that Siren! Thanks so much....!

[luviva]

great, poem!
love the decriptional change from what it was and what it became.. you know
great work ma darling GO ALL THE WAY!!

[Frieda P]

Sweet review, thanks luviva!

[luviva]

welcome dear you are always wirth it you know,

[Frieda P]

You're too good to me :-)

[luviva]

no, am made too good by your poems... remember??

[beautiful dreamer]

wow! beautiful frieda!

[Frieda P]

Thanks Jen, glad you liked it!

[Tarry Franck]

Love this!

[Frieda P]

Thanks again Tarry!

[SimpleMind]

It speaks of the unwanted truth.
You are really amazing Frie!

[Frieda P]

Ha you just put a big smile on my face, thanks so much SM ;-)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Warning signs and red flags cannot be ignored... the butterflies escaping certain death is brilliant.

[Frieda P]

Oh thanks muchly Dale, so happy you liked my butterflies :-)

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

I want them to live :)