~Surrender~

   Write  in passion

          your  word upon my soul

give me your promise

            and your breath

look into my eyes

                    before you declare

sweet nothings

                 upon  my breasts

echo into the winds

                  of storm force gales

trace your blood 

              in the sands of eternity

sign no convenant

                     before its time

do  not rise 

                 in your manhood

place no sword 

               upon my loins

     until you have forsaken

                 all others

    to surrender

           in the arms of eternal bliss

Author's Note

just a thought...

Reviews

[quinfinn]

and a very beautiful thought this is...such a realistic and lovingly prepared declaration of gentle expectations. what man could resist the charm of this? anyone who has a heart and a gentle and fidelitous nature would run, not walk...to the arms of this enchantress. you write the most gorgeous undertones in your prose....love it, love it, love it!

[Frieda P]

As I love your reviews quin. Love the word 'enchantress' by the way, you won my heart with that one big time!

[Benita-Staebell M - Kin..]

So stunning and
a gorgeous piece.

I loved this😁💛👏




Write in passion
your word upon my soul
give me your promise
and your breath
look into my eyes
before you declare
sweet nothings
upon my breasts
echo into the winds

[KeelyJane]

Beautiful demands. And for good reason. I've always loved your way with words.
I've been gone for a while and it's nice to come back to the cafe and see old faces still shining.

[Robbie~xoxo~]

I love this... to surrender, a declaration of love for eternal bliss...
"give me your promise

and your breath

look into my eyes

before you declare

sweet nothings

upon my breasts"~ This is lovely...way to have the respect you deserve, Frieda!..with passion comes a deeper part of the giving and taking...duly noted!..a great thought!

[Relic]

It's an intelligent way of thinking a thought. The message is loud and clear and I think it speaks for a lot of woman who want to be much more than a toy for a man's temporary pleasures. Nice work Frieda.

[lee von cleef]

"Just a closer walk with thee" blue grass" dear lord let it be"" if I falter who cares?" Strum bass thump, "Let it be dear lord let it be" "Time for me will be no more" "To thy shores" "Dare we walk" smooth Freida,....

[Frieda P]

Thanks lee.

[Priscilla Sayers]

Beautiful love! And a very great message in there;)
You have woven sensuality with love.

[Frieda P]

One would think they'd be mutually exclusive or in the very least attainable! Thanks sweet Priscilla. ;-)

[Priscilla Sayers]

Not always unfortunately, there can be sensuality without love. Lust is all passion and sensuality, savage, yet a shallow desire. But love, it can contain all those elements of desire giving depth, breathing one soul into another. Much more powerful. My favorite part of your poem is the message to surrender, to commit to only each other, forsaking all others. When that is done, mutually felt, the infusion becomes intense and no other can satisfy that need for connection except the ONE. And it does exist, and can exist many times over. Sorry. I had more than 2 cents as always, but if I didn't have a banging headache it would have been a dollar:)lol

[Frieda P]

Ha I'l take whatever you have!! Love hearing from you, you're wise beyond your years...headache and stuff must be going around, feel better, and thanks again love!

[luviva]

wow,love the helplessness in this poem, am all yours nice write

[Frieda P]

Thanks luviva, glad you liked it....seems to be a part of life that we all cope with at one time or another.

[MAC]

and a well worded thought! love your opinions and passion :)

[Frieda P]

Ha thanks Mark, that's what most people can't tolerate! ;-)

[MAC]

you are welcome Frieda...IMO, most people are idiots! :)

[Frieda P]

Haha, I will agree with you there, most annoying at times! ;-)

[MAC]

LOL...at times AKA all of the time

[Frieda P]

Shhh, I was trying to be nice! ;-)

[PP]

I can't agree more with you today !

"do not rise
in your manhood
place no sword
upon my loins
until you have forsaken
all others"
Guess should be printed on wannabe lovers' heads !

[Frieda P]

Ha, now that's a thought! Why didn't I think of that? Thanks Tink!

[PP]

haha..my pleasure :)