If I Were A P***y

Inspired by Chris after A Simple Pause whilst he purred at the ladies on his thread.

If I were a p***y

I'd climb upon your lap

I'd purr like a kitten

til you fed me

 & stroked me,

teased me, said 

'here kitty, kitty'

then I'd lick you all over

If I were a p***y

                                         puuuuurrrrrrrrrr

Reviews

[Chris]

Cats have ever followed me home - even if I were walking a Great Dane (true story). I've had them leap into my arms in parking lots...curl on my lap at outdoor cafes. And once home, they curl atop my books, journals, even the keyboard. Watching them play with computer mouse symbols is fun... especially if you connect the HDMI cable to a LARGE flatscreen TV and move the Mouse from across the room.

I've one that stands on the kitchen table and talks with me as I make coffee or clean dishes.

[Frieda P]

Not sure how to read that...but lucky you, either way! ;-)

[Chris]

Every word is true... interchangeable parts remain behind my eyes... chuckling here.

[Frieda P]

Ahh, I can see behind those baby blues sir....

[Chris]

if so then you are rolling on your floor...giggling uncontrollaby at the mind pic.

[Frieda P]

Since I'm still at work, I tried to control my urge to fling myself to the floor in a fit of giggles...payroll is going to be a b***h this week, ha....!

[Chris]

chuckling here... you really have NO idea of just how true THAT statement is about to be...

[Frieda P]

Sounds ominous, not sure which one of us should worry....!

[Chris]

neither - actually...you were just ...teased.

[Frieda P]

Yes I KNOW, big time! ;-)

[Chris]

Puuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrr..."

[Frieda P]

RAWR!

[Chris]

MROWL!! hssth, hisst!!

[J. J. Nightingale]

Wow .. You have a large flat screen TV ... wow ....

[Chris]

cat goes edge to edge chasing the pointer. Of course sometimes when a normal movie is on the cat wants to sit a couple of inches from the center of the screen's surface and wait for the mouse to appear...

[Chris]

is a fairly large longhair cat... has a Lion's Mane...

[J. J. Nightingale]

Ha .. I always had 5 or 6 cats all the time, when the last one died, I never went to get another one ... I love them so, can't bear the loss ... but ....... WOW You have a large flat screen TV ...Wow .... :)

[Frieda P]

ha shiny stuff! Did you forget your little green pill again Jazzy? ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Wow ... I had one long hair like that, the shedding was too much for me .. mostly had tabby's .. but I love them all . Pictures !!! show pics ..lol ............:)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Ha Frieda ... nooooooo .. took two ..lol .. Work to do, and a Jury Summons to get excused from .. sigh ..... >>

[Chris]

One day I'll post some pics of the "guys" - neutered male and female - a third (female also) was put down last November it was aged and fading and at its end.

[Frieda P]

Work ugh, how can we get any 'real work' done here when work interferes? just start hyperventilating Jazz, it works every time ha ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

lol @ Frieda ... :)...................... >>>>

[Chris]

I don't think Freida was teasing!...

[J. J. Nightingale]

I KNOW THAT !!!!!!!!!! ..:) ..............

[Frieda P]

haha I've never actually had to hyperventilate, I carry my burden of proof papers with me at all times to show I've been deemed legally insane...that works too Jazzy.... ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

HA HA .......................... :)

[Frieda P]

:-)

[Marie]

Cute. I'm surprised at Chris's comments. Most cate are stand offish till they get to know you, and even then they show reserve. If you were a p***y, you wouldn't be like that, of course.

[Frieda P]

ha Marie, was that a dig of sorts? ;-P

[Marie]

Not at all.

[Jack...]

This is Purrfect. Do you think you might cough up a hair ball for me as well?

[Frieda P]

LOL I'm not touching that!

[MAC]

i really need to get a cat. :)

[Frieda P]

Someone's on a roll today I see! ;-P

[kelvin]

Nice one here here kitty kitty meow hahaha you have a talent for words as always keep writing fellow writer.

[Frieda P]

;-) ha ha I know what you mean by 'talent' ;-P

[kelvin]

hahaha do you now haha

[Frieda P]

As if you guys were that hard to read! ha

[kelvin]

haha leave it to the writer of this piece to take away the innocence of a little kitty wanting food and some TLC hahaha now that's a good one for you haha

[quinfinn]

nice thought. being licked by a p***y. makes me really miss my cat, Tigger. she was the apple of my eye. thank you for taking me down that memory lane with this delicious little piece. i used to love to wake up to her purring in my face whilst making biscuits on my chest. there is nothing quite like the love a sweet little p***y gives you.

[Frieda P]

Biscuits? Seriously...ha, that's one p***y I'd not miss, or you, whatever.... ;-P

[quinfinn]

ooh, you got me, okay ....buns! knew you'd see thru this one.....

[Frieda P]

ha bad p***y...

[quinfinn]

never heard of such a thing

[Frieda P]

hahaa....you keep overfeeding them, that's why...................

[quinfinn]

meeeeeeeeeeeeeeowwww! i just saw this, you little tabby!

[kublakhan27]

I think I can live with that reality as you portray it here ;P

[Frieda P]

Ha of course you can............................

[kublakhan27]

;P

[Kaylor Mason]

My cat Shadow would love this

[Frieda P]

Can he/she read?

[Kaylor Mason]

I don't know--never asked her. She can manipulate me like a Queen, though. She rules, and she knows it :)

[Frieda P]

ha p***y rules ;-)

[Lover Of Words]

"clears throat" Jaw drops to the floor.... She has an intreging side.... Nice

[Frieda P]

LOL!

[Lucien Maier]

great word play, really well done

[Frieda P]

Word play, whatever are you talking about Lucien? ;-)