If I Were A P***y

Inspired by Chris after A Simple Pause whilst he purred at the ladies on his thread.

If I were a p***y

I'd climb upon your lap

I'd purr like a kitten

til you fed me

 & stroked me,

teased me, said 

'here kitty, kitty'

then I'd lick you all over

If I were a p***y

                                         puuuuurrrrrrrrrr

Reviews

[Chris]

Cats have ever followed me home - even if I were walking a Great Dane (true story). I've had them leap into my arms in parking lots...curl on my lap at outdoor cafes. And once home, they curl atop my books, journals, even the keyboard. Watching them play with computer mouse symbols is fun... especially if you connect the HDMI cable to a LARGE flatscreen TV and move the Mouse from across the room.

I've one that stands on the kitchen table and talks with me as I make coffee or clean dishes.

[Frieda P]

Not sure how to read that...but lucky you, either way! ;-)

[Chris]

Every word is true... interchangeable parts remain behind my eyes... chuckling here.

[Frieda P]

Ahh, I can see behind those baby blues sir....

[Chris]

if so then you are rolling on your floor...giggling uncontrollaby at the mind pic.

[Frieda P]

Since I'm still at work, I tried to control my urge to fling myself to the floor in a fit of giggles...payroll is going to be a b***h this week, ha....!

[Chris]

chuckling here... you really have NO idea of just how true THAT statement is about to be...

[Frieda P]

Sounds ominous, not sure which one of us should worry....!

[Chris]

neither - actually...you were just ...teased.

[Frieda P]

Yes I KNOW, big time! ;-)

[Chris]

Puuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrr..."

[Frieda P]

RAWR!

[Chris]

MROWL!! hssth, hisst!!

[J. J. Nightingale]

Wow .. You have a large flat screen TV ... wow ....

[Chris]

cat goes edge to edge chasing the pointer. Of course sometimes when a normal movie is on the cat wants to sit a couple of inches from the center of the screen's surface and wait for the mouse to appear...

[Chris]

is a fairly large longhair cat... has a Lion's Mane...

[J. J. Nightingale]

Ha .. I always had 5 or 6 cats all the time, when the last one died, I never went to get another one ... I love them so, can't bear the loss ... but ....... WOW You have a large flat screen TV ...Wow .... :)

[Frieda P]

ha shiny stuff! Did you forget your little green pill again Jazzy? ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Wow ... I had one long hair like that, the shedding was too much for me .. mostly had tabby's .. but I love them all . Pictures !!! show pics ..lol ............:)

[J. J. Nightingale]

Ha Frieda ... nooooooo .. took two ..lol .. Work to do, and a Jury Summons to get excused from .. sigh ..... >>

[Chris]

One day I'll post some pics of the "guys" - neutered male and female - a third (female also) was put down last November it was aged and fading and at its end.

[Frieda P]

Work ugh, how can we get any 'real work' done here when work interferes? just start hyperventilating Jazz, it works every time ha ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

lol @ Frieda ... :)...................... >>>>

[Chris]

I don't think Freida was teasing!...

[J. J. Nightingale]

I KNOW THAT !!!!!!!!!! ..:) ..............

[Frieda P]

haha I've never actually had to hyperventilate, I carry my burden of proof papers with me at all times to show I've been deemed legally insane...that works too Jazzy.... ;-)

[J. J. Nightingale]

HA HA .......................... :)

[Frieda P]

:-)

[Relic]

What a lovely poem. ;)

[Brandon S. Whitten]

I used to do as I please now I have 3 dogs. Good read and write.

[redflutterby]

Haha... yep I just had to come take a peek!!! You are so good at being naughty with the most innocent of subjects. Or maybe its just my devious little mind.... ;-D

[Frieda P]

Lmao, it has to be YOU!! ;-P

[redflutterby]

Oh sure blame it on the redhead....uhuh... ;-p

[Frieda P]

Hey just be happy you didn't get stuck with red hair AND a penis, then you'd be in big trouble hahahaha

[redflutterby]

Lmfao.....oh really????? Don't even want to know!!! ;-D

[Frieda P]

Ha, you know how that goes, redheaded woman are all moxy & hot stuff, they certainly got the short end of the stick! ha, no pun intended ;-P

[redflutterby]

Lmao... no ones like a short stick....
Oh wait you said short end of the stick. ;-P

[redflutterby]

Feel free to edit that.. geez... illiterate much?? Arghhh

[gcp]

awwww cute

Sandpaper tongue and sharp little claws - a strange kind of affection.

[Frieda P]

Glad you enjoyed it gcp...thanks.

[icelandicblue]

Well, I love the double entendre and enjoyed the playfulness of your words.

[Frieda P]

Thanks for the great review icelandicblue.

[PP]

hahahaha..makes me think how much of a laughter have I missed! Frieda you are a genius. You almost know which keywords to use in the title to get maximum hits eh?

[Frieda P]

Well you know damn well that 'if I were a cat' wouldn't have worked! ;-P

[PP]

hahaha..Frieda your new expertise PEO (Poetic Engine Optimization) !

[Frieda P]

Hahaa, I might just steal that from you!

[PP]

Its all yours baby! haha x

[Frieda P]

Oh I love it when you call me 'baby' *wink* haha ;-)

[PP]

lol..I bet you missed me x

[Muse]

I wish I were a cat..it sounds so easy. Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring to get my way.

[Frieda P]

meoooowww..........

[jacob erin-cilberto]

okay, i'm blushing a bit...and clearing my throat.

[Frieda P]

ha, I can just picture you blushing too...ha

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Oh I ABSOLUTELY love this one!!!!!! Sassy woman!...this makes my inner kitten purrrrrrrrr just reading it. Going in my favs for sure, you grabbed me by the title...and WOW! Such a fun read. What man wouldn't love a kitty to crawl on his lap?...this is delicious. :D

[Frieda P]

Glad you enjoyed it so much! ha ;-D meowww

[Yellow Butterfly]

Oops number 314 now....

It's your wicked sense of humour :o)

Funny write and funny title...

[Frieda P]

I don't really get what you mean by that... ;-)

[Yellow Butterfly]

lol :o)

[Frieda P]

:-D