Angel of One Wing

A very dear friend of mine sent me that wonderful picture, which inspired this. As survivors, we've always called ourselves one winged angels. Enjoy.

Angel

 with the fractured wing 

whispers

 on a zephyr's snowflake

catches

 the tears of sullen eyes

blowing kisses

 per messages of love

         bubble wraps 

your heart for safe keeping 

floats

    on a periwinkle cotton candy pillow

no broken element

 can deny your potent power

                 like a candle flickering

 in a strong gust of wind &

crashing roar of waves at high tides fury

the cries of great warrior's 

           forging survival in battle

no wreckage

 will snuff your courage nor strength

soaring ever so softly

 to save the lives of myriad crush

carrying the other one winged angels

 with felicitous fortitude's 

conviction

 onto billows of silk

 for a safe place to gently fall

                                                                        

                                                                                       

                        

                                                             

 

Reviews

[Dinesh Sairam]

I found the assonance (sullen eyes, roar of waves) and alliteration (cotton candy, potent power) to be distracting. I'm not sure if you planned those things, but I prefer seeing them in a romantic or humorous poem. Maybe it's just me.

Because, this is much more than just sparks and fire. This is strong and straight-forward. "no wreckage will snuff your courage" is, for me, the lines that best animates the poem.

And I got here from the "heart over mind" contest, which asked to review a poem that's already entered in the contest. I thought it was a great, nimble idea. Hope you reviewed someone's poem too.

Good day. Keep writing.

[Frieda P]

Thank you kindly for your review, as for the cotton candy, I wanted something light and ethereal...delicate like cotton candy.

Yes, I have reviewed as a matter of fact.

Appreciate your critique, pen on....

[Kajal Gulabani]

Very descriptive and dreamy.. Nice nice.. Kudos!

[fiery-san]

Beautifully done... one winged angels... hopefully there will come a time where their broken wings had mended and they could fly freely once more. Good job. ^_^

[DrD]

A step beyond eloquent, your treatment is so delicate and inspiring that it has to be marked as one of your best works.

[Frieda P]

Wow, thanks doc. This one is very special to me. Much appreciated.

[An owl on the moon]

Such a beautiful vision that shines like flaming sunbeams through deep black storm clouds that too often surround us... Yes... we are not meant to be alone... may we learn to fly with the wings of others as well as our own. You inspire us, dear poet.

[Corset]

I love this , it's soft yet strong, quiet yet speaks volumes.

[Frieda P]

Thanks for that great review Corset.

[quinfinn]

this is beautiful , Frieda, and in a more serious mode now, are we? you are the quintessential romance poet when you aren't fooling around and having fun with words, which i know you so love to do (as do i) and this is proof positive of that!

[Frieda P]

You're making me fall in love with you more each day....thanks

[quinfinn]

careful what you wish for...rumor has it i'm a keeper!

[Frieda P]

Hmmm, never had one of those! I love a challenge...

[.]

this is a tender writing indeed. highlights of some marvellous poetry too!
"kisses per messages of love"
"great warriors forging survival"
just,.marvellous - accented by the absence of punctuation, i might add

[Frieda P]

Thanks jay, means a lot coming from you. Yeah, hardly ever punctuate whilst I write poetry, I don't know, don't feel it.

[InsanityWriter]

Lovely. :) Excellent piece. (: