The Shame of IT

The aftermath of sexual abuse.

We take on the blame, we inherit the shame
wallowing in the aftermath of an apocalypse
proportions to take down the most resilient warrior
we fight to the death our right to a voice
trust is crushed beyond reparation
truth is heard in the distance by some
stark realities knock in darkness and light
sleep filled with the incoherent disgraces
seeped into the soul's consciousness'
assaulting all reason and sanity
sanctioned for self destruction
the shame that follows engulfs 
innocence admonishes all evil 
still stuck in the turmoil of self hatred
unjustly bestowed on the naive guiltless 
shame's name branded on the psyche
slammed by the brick wall of inertia
sabotaged lives go astray and unfold
the real shame of it all, its not our onus 
yet, life no longer flows naturally..............

Author's Note

Sexual abuse leaves behind not only scars but guilt and shame, feelings of disgrace, dishonor, and being de-valued, especially in children. Often a person will see themselves as flawed and take on much of the blame and feelings of self doubt. Not to mention the debilitating reactions after disclosure of disbelief and total rejection of the truth.

"Over 90% of sexual offenders are someone the child knows and trusts – a parent or other relative."

Reviews

[John Stussy]

Grammatically, in this line, distant ought to be switched to distance.
"truth is heard in the distant by some"

As far as the content and message go, this was brilliant and potent. A certain section of lines really stood out to me, I re-read them several times just because they caught my eye so. "the shame that follows engulfs / innocence admonishes all evil / still stuck in the turmoil of self hatred / unjustly bestowed on the naive guiltless" I felt that these lines in particular caught the ugliest part of the abuse that's the subject for this piece. That someone would inflict the mental torture upon any human being in a position of the victim that they are the one at fault is horrid, monstrous really. I think the death penalty is too kind for one who inflicts such trauma, and I've been known to be a big fan of the dp. My deepest and most sincere condolences go out to anyone who has suffered in such a way.

[Frieda P]

Thanks John, very sweet and touching review. I'll fix that typo.

[John Stussy]

No problem, thank you for sharing your words Frieda.

[David Scott]

You have penned some very real truths here. I felt the line, "slammed by the brick wall of inertia" and the last line, "life no longer flows naturally".
I wish I did not understand this...
Yet life does still "flow"! The beauty if it now more profound from the very insistence of the "inertia" that is generated from a soul that will not be left to hide alone in unjustified shame.
Great write!

[Frieda P]

I wish no one understood it, but that's not real life, is it? Thanks so much for your kindness.

[Ahmad Cox]

Its a horrifying statistic that I think we should be looking at and really asking ourselves what are we going to do about it

[Frieda P]

Good question indeed, it's a tough battle. Making people aware is the first step, but that goes with much heartache and sometimes further damage of an already delicate psyche...

[Ahmad Cox]

This is true as well

[Relic]

It's always so sad and yet infuriating to her of someone going through this, especially when it's a friend. I once read about a man who was sexually abused by a woman and others at a very early age. He wound up slitting the woman's throat before killing himself. He made a video explaining it all before he carried out the murder/suicide. All abusers should be castrated at the very least.

[Frieda P]

I hear of these types of stories all the time on the survivor site I'm on, it's truly heart wrenching in the aftermath.

[James William Dyer]

it's almost uncanny how the most prolific molesters are also very capable of "seeming" to validate normalcy, they hide in the wide open. The hatred and all the horror-show emotions they bestow on their victims, though, can be useful to them, if employed correctly. Nice job with the words

[Frieda P]

Shockingly true, when I've spoken of this, I've had people say 'no way', in total disbelief, 'he's such a nice man'.

[Frieda P]

OMG I hate that saying! Makes me livid.

[Frieda P]

I've gotten 'this too shall pass' Oh really? Like I broke my arm or something...maddening.

[Relic]

I think the emotions involved are too much for anyone to fix with words. You can't make something so horrible disappear from the mind when its so much a part of it I guess.

[Frieda P]

They can't be fixed, they barely lighten up, that's why I'm on a constant search for mind erasers.

[Sethnicity]

So freaking sad and terrible... I lost the love of my life to Sexual abuse... She is still alive but her scars leave her on emotional life support.

If I wasn't in public right now I think I could write about it because of your poem... the deepest emotions are bubbling inside me... maybe on a day I have some more strength. Your thoughts are beams of light piercing through boards over my heart.

[Frieda P]

Such a touching review Sethnicity, thanks so much.

[Elvis Gilley]

Found this to be a great write. I appreciate you sharing and I enjoyed the journey. It led me down a path that I am thankful until now I have never met. Thanks E

[Frieda P]

thank you for taking the time out to read this Elvis, much apprecitated

[DrD]

The manipulaton and sexual control of a child has to rank among the most heinous crimes and I have always felt that the penalty standards were never high enough. An excellent treatment of this social problem that I had to read twice.

[Frieda P]

Thank you doc, means a lot.

[Aidz]

I will not comment as you know where this heart lays, except to say thank you for sharing Frieda

[Frieda P]

Thank you for being supportive Aidz x

[That_Girl]

It's a sad world... it's almost commonplace at this point. Terrible. Great piece though.

[Frieda P]

Thanks Avy, it's horrible to think it's 'commplace' isn't it?

[KeeD]

"slammed by the brick wall of inertia" you're mind I tell you, brilliant.
This has a really deep meaning to it, I hope it gets published in some journal, paper, magazine, it needs to be seen, to be read to be spoken about. Nothing can take away the shame, not only guilt and shame but the victims feel some what responsible that they weren't able to protect themselves, do anything about it, tell someone and it haunts and eats them forever. My country is in an uproar at the moment, a 23 year old was gang-raped in the capital city, Not only did they rape her but they brutally attacked her, tearing out her insides. She's still fighting for life in a hospital. The entire youth of our nation has rally'd for the past week protesting, demanding the death penalty for the rapists. The politicians use this as a chance to shed light on their political parties etc.. by joining it, at the same time urge the police to stop this rally and attack the kids. Chaos, the world didn't end in 2012,but it sure feels like it got a lot worse.

[Frieda P]

You are the sweetest dear Kee, yes, unfortunately that poor girl died since you wrote this here, it's an atrocity that men get away with this brutality, I say take that metal rod and do to them what they did to her.

[Baby Ricochet]

Very powerful. Thank you for posting this

[Frieda P]

Thank you for reading Baby.