Do the Croak

Tongue in cheek rant about cheaters, and how women so often say they're going to change sides because of it...it's supposed to a joke guys! ;-)

I want to dance on your heart, 

not some old fashioned love song

more like an Irish riverdance

or a good old fashioned slammin' stomp

cowboys boots were made for a kicker two step

Yeeehaaa!! now I'm gonna line dance over you

 stiletto's will let me tango on your face

crunch disgusting insects the likes of you

Lie to me again about your vile cheating heart

shuffling with my old reliable metal tap shoes

Dancing in the rain ain't  no picnic

when you're the puddle my little pretty

One last hardcore punk dance or perhaps 

a jitterbug would suit that demeanor

when you were supposed to be in our bed

you were doing the  horizontal mambo elsewhere

Now crank crank that cheating heart to death

Gonna waltz myself right to a dip in the lady pond

where no two timing cheating frogs croak on me

Reviews

[kublakhan27]

I'm not sure if this lines up with your theme, but this poem brought to mind the "singing frog" from Looney Toons ("One Froggy Evening")...an animal that hides this incredible talent, showing it off only long enough to tempt its owner with the fame that would accompany the ownership of a "singing frog" but turning into just a boring old frog when the owner attempts to showcase him for profit. I'm a guy but I definitely tip my hat to this exquisite little rant...I promise I'm not one of those "singing frogs" :)

[Frieda P]

Oh that's so funny, I just looked up the little green guy! ;)

[kublakhan27]

LOL One of the best cartoons of all-time ;D

[Frieda P]

I can't believe I've never seen that one!

[kublakhan27]

I'm a LT buff so I probably have an unfair advantage lol :)

[Frieda P]

If you would have said the Tasmanian Devil or Foghorn Leghorn, I'd have been there! ;)

[kublakhan27]

Haha Yeah they're classics for sure ;)

[fiery-san]

The first thing that I thought when I came across this title was that it's going to be about dancing... I got that part down, I just didn't expect it to be about cheaters though despite the intro... and now that I think about it croak could mean die as well... ignore my morbidness...

I like the humor in this piece and its rather vindictive tendencies... good job. ^_^

[Frieda P]

You picked up on that eh? Thanks, I had fun with it, whilst I threw a few plates simultaneously across the room. ;-)

[DrD]

I learned to do the limbo at pay toilets. I learned all my dance movments waiting to get into the bathroom when my sisters were young. Being as innocent as I am, this work does not apply to me but nonetheless, I commend you for your originality and imagination. Imagination because men don't cheat (alone).

[Frieda P]

haha must be Harold speaking, he lives in a fantasy world. Tell doc I said thanks very much. ;-)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

As always a well constructed piece. A touch of humour and tongue in cheek. Take your shoes off at the door please Mam.

[Frieda P]

Sorry, no shoes to be had, I already threw those. ;-)

[Sheila Kline]

Oh, these boots are made for walking, and stomping, and giving a good swift kick to where the "sun don't shine".....cheaters deserve to be permanently sent out of the dance line!
Great write!!

[Frieda P]

Thanks muchly Shelia, now you've got me humming that silly tune. :)

[quinfinn]

omg...shades of "liverdance"! i, for one, have never been a cheater but...i do pity the fool who gets caught by you. this has so much droll and dark humor that i kept laughing throughout the entire read. i loved the "my pretty" line, thought you were gonna release the flying monkeys!

[Frieda P]

Why didn't I think of that?! Believe me, if I had had flying monkeys they'd have been there, really I wanted to RELEASE THE KRAKEN on his a*s! lol

[quinfinn]

hahaha!!!!

[Frieda P]

haha, and 'my pretty' scares the ballsiest of em!! :D

[quinfinn]

even Perseus, holding the head of Medusa, would run away!

[Frieda P]

as they should carrying around my sisters freakin head!

[quinfinn]

oof!

[Frieda P]

haha 'oof' made me laugh :D

[David Scott]

I think someone might have shared a private note with you... Ha
Loved the picture and the satire!
The poetry itself did not draw me to the finish. I would have like to have some rhym to add to the tangy tone here, or at least a rythmic meter, but you said what you meant to say well.
;-)

[Frieda P]

Kiss my arse Dave. ;-P

[Frieda P]

Did I say that? I meant thanks love. :)

[David Scott]

I think you already said that...;-)
But I will pass.
Thank you kindly for the invitation. I would love to read more of your work though. Maybe, if I'm feeling very low and meek, someday... Ha

[Frieda P]

Are you purposely trying to annoy the poo out of me?! ;-)

[David Scott]

Oh my... I hope not. I shall examine my motives and get back to you dear.
"Ribbit", splash! Enjoy your "dip in the pond". lol I know I do.

[Frieda P]

lol, keep it up, I'm calling Uncle Gambino ;-P

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

You sound like the second coming of Nancy Sinatra :) I've been cheated on myself and I must say I love your tongue in cheek approach in laughing at it.

[InsanityWriter]

Nice. :)

[KAOlmsted]

HA! Women cheat, too, you know ;-)

Good rant, Frieda...nicely done with the dance references, although, I have to admit, I am confused as to where frogs got all tangled up in the mix. Meh. Whatever. I liked it. Thanks for sharing.

[Frieda P]

Kiss a frog, lady pond...hahaha I have no freakin clue, I just go wherever it takes me lol :-P

[LA Lorena]

LOL! I've danced that dance a time or two, but I despite it, would simply prefer to shadow dance than dance with another woman. Too confusing to figure out who gets to lead!

[Frieda P]

haha, I've not been there YET! Needed to go the lighter side of life after the night I had, thanks.

[LA Lorena]

LOL! I meant dancing in heels to stomp on a bloody cheater! My halo only swings one way!

[Frieda P]

Hahaha, you're just playing hard to get!