80 Proof

Sometimes a drink is just fun and sometimes it a necessary evil.

If drinking vodka is wrong, then I don't wanna be right 

how else to escape the demons but yet another one 

this one's a bit kinder in it's effect, although not in the a.m. 

so a hangover is all I'm left with, better than those malformations 

they lurk in the recesses of my mind twisting and churning 

questioning my every movement while my eyes are open  

cutting deep into my sleep when the darkness of night falls 

never any composure for the obsessing of shame, guilt and treachery 

 

Demon alcohol seems more forgiving in the light of day 

there's a reprieve along the way lapsing momentarily 

not the constant badgering of spirits past hauntings 

more fluidity of a spirit that I choose to tolerate 

so my liver will pay the price, better than the mind's eye 

where horrors linger reborn a thousand times over 

never skipping a beat for breath or relaxation's placidity 

decision to break or make it; for now I'll bask in the sun of 80 proof

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

it does seem more forgiving in the day...

i am not an alcoholic, but was married to a recovering one...and another who thought she wasn't---but...

and i lost a best friend, and may lose another to the disease...

it does badger the spirit, and it haunts...and the friend i lost? liver disease and it got her fast once it took hold.

this is a necessary poem...and could really wake some people up.

jacob

[KAOlmsted]

"not the constant badgering of spirits past hauntings
more fluidity of a spirit that I choose to tolerate..."
--that's a powerful line, sister.

Hi, my name is kimmer and I'm an alcoholic...I struggle daily with that 80 proof demon, and I'll be honest, I don't always come out victorious. I don't have near as much trauma in my past as you have, Frieda, so I'm not ever going to pretend I know what you're going through, but I can see we've both decided to salve the wounds we each carry with the same balm ;-) In that, I know EXACTLY what you're going through...I don't know if I'll drink today or not. I do know it's my choice either way, just as it's yours to do as you please. I really took a lot from this piece and I thank you so much for sharing it with us...it's never easy to expose your pale, white underbelly...but good poetry--the s**t that MATTERS--always comes from that place.

-kimmer

[That_Girl]

Go big or go home, right? :D I love this! Alcohol can be your very best friend at times, especially vodka. It is destructive, yes, but sometimes we just don't care and it's the thrill of the ride that matters, not the destination. Awesome poem!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Wow 80 Proof! you guys sure know how to die! We keep it to 40 max. I think many of us can relate to this very honest work. The alcohol does not make demands other than to feed our guilt and make us more dsepressed. A cycle of certain destruction but so hard to ignore its lure.