Hanging up my heart.

Hanging up my heart.

A Poem by Freeman

You,are the one I fell for
BANG,
Without doubt.
Like the crashing of a tidal
Uncontrolled,
go without
a condition,contract
a scream or a shout.

You are the one I fell for
BANG,
It hits us all
so I clasp so very gently
And pin my heart upon the wall.

© 2010 Freeman


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Reviews

Yes when love hit us. No turning back. A powerful poem. Direst and to the point. I like the complete poem. It is outstanding.
Coyote

Posted 14 Years Ago


Like a sucker punch that leaves you gasping, I picture buying a heart at the cash register for a buck, writing my name on it and hanging it with the ten thousand other hearts from people that have checked out through the same line. Nice work, I really liked this.

Posted 14 Years Ago


Inspired by Solomon Burke

Im hanging up my heart for you

Posted 14 Years Ago


I was going to nail it but wanted to keep the delicateness at the end of this piece.


Thanks for reviewing

Freeman

Posted 14 Years Ago


Sounds more BANG, like your, BANG, nailing your heart up on the wall.... which in some cases might not be a bad idea.
You have a solid feel and clear words with your poetry, a recognizable voice.

Posted 14 Years Ago


And pin my heart upon the wall..if only it was as easy not to fall..:)
a delight to read..

Posted 14 Years Ago


At times, it's not my heart I'd like to pin on the wall, but my mind.....gets me in all kinds of weird situations that end up in worse than BANG.....Nice writing.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I the how you distributed the emphasis of the "bang" its sts the tone in the opening and then is reallized throughout the body of the poem. really nice write

Posted 14 Years Ago


[send message][befriend] Subscribe
...
. you write beautifully ... with passion and precision ...


Posted 14 Years Ago



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9 Reviews
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Added on October 16, 2010
Last Updated on October 16, 2010

Author

Freeman
Freeman

United Kingdom



About
Hi I am new to writing poetry, Although I have been writing songs and it would seem that they go hand in hand. I have set myself a task to write something new everyday whether it good or bad,So take .. more..

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