The Seeds I sew

I'm not quite awake
but I'm not asleep
the fear it eats away
And I can't tell defeat
I'm falling and I'm clinging...
and sinking in too deep
I know what I have sewn,
and now it's time to reap...
the seeds have fallen,
spreading my deceit,
my anger flares...
Every mistake, I'm fated to repeat...
I drove you away,
allowed you to cheat,
There's now a blackness
that my heart starts to secrete
You could have kept quiet
You could have been discreet
But my energy is gone
which you chose to deplete
And Every man who falls
Will have to learn to compete
Because without you
my heart is incomplete
Everything is clear
the evidence so concrete,
I marginalize
My life is now effete