The Essence of Eternity - I - Awaken - Chapters I - VIII

Tita's world changes on her 18th; her true nature is revealed, she is an immortal fairy with royal blood and she falls in love with her gorgeous protector, Dubhghall. In this new world lays danger...

The Essence of Eternity

Awaken

 

 

By

F.P. Chat

 

 

 

 

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PUBLISHED BY:

F.P. Chat 

 

 

Awaken

Copyright © 2012 by F.P. Chat

 

 

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. It may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy.

 

 

Your support and respect for the property of this author is appreciated.

 

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This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locations is purely coincidental. The characters are productions of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.

 

 

Special thanks to my sweet sister, Tania, and my best friend ever, Diamanté, who read and re-read this first attempt and guided my inspiration towards productive paths. I couldn't have done it without them.

 

 

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Awaken

 

 

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Chapter I - The realization

 

 

Friday 00:03, May 14th, 2010

I always thought there was more to come in my life.

My life was not bad but it never felt complete either. I was trembling through my steps all my years. I was living, studying, enjoying, everything with an anticipation that my real life had not started yet. I was never sure of my actions. Never completely satisfied with everything I experienced. I followed my daily routine just to leave behind my days, my years… until this something would appear. Until this someone would appear… until he would appear. I was waiting for this mysterious stranger, this wonderful man that would come into my life and delete all my previous memories. I was looking forward to be madly and passionately in love... to live for him. Aren’t we all? I did not expect anything more than every girl dreams, did I?

And he did appear! Just another day. He showed up and all the rest faded away. Only he was nothing as I expected him to be…well, not nothing; he was damn gorgeous and sexy and smart but brought too many news! Bad news! I could see disaster coming but I did not care anymore.

He had come for me!

 

Chapter II - Parents

 

 

My name is Titania; I was named after the Fairy Queen of the ‘Midsummer Night's Dream’, since my mum really loves Shakespeare. She claims she decided on my name the very first moment she saw me, as even from birth I looked different. I do have red orange hair and green eyes but apart from that, there is nothing special or extraordinary with me. I am quite tall for a Greek girl, almost clumsy, I usually carry a couple more pounds than what I would like to, and I also keep my curly hair really long, so they don’t frizz awkwardly. My skin is white; so pale that seems transparent some times. As a result it gets burned really quickly. Very useful attribute when you live most of your life in a country that is sunny ninety nine percent of the time, Greece!

I am half Greek and half Irish; talking about crazy combination. Greeks are funny, resourceful, loud, charming and always really late, while Irish are… well a lot like leprechauns but really beautiful. My mum, the Greek, spent her University years in London, where she met my dad, Irish obviously, and they fell madly in love. A couple of years later I opened my eyes for the very first time. Their love ended at some point and since then, I spend some days in Greece and some days in Ireland, like a nomad. I am fine with it though. I like Greece and I really love Ireland but last year I decided I didn’t want to live in neither; I wanted to go study somewhere else; somewhere new, so I chose a University in Edinburgh and made it my new goal, to become a student there. Edinburgh is one of the most beautiful cities I have ever seen in real life or photos. Honestly I cannot understand why they call it Athens of the North, as indeed it is way more beautiful than the Greek Athens, with all the chaos, the traffic, the smog and almost five million people. The connection of the old and the new city is unique, the Medieval Castles, the rare views of the whole city from the hills. This city always reminded me of gothic poetry; it hides some kind of magic which I find mostly appealing. The population hardly reaches the four hundred fifty thousand people and of course the weather is closer to my preference than the always sunny, really hot and steamy climate of Greece.

Growing up in-between Greece and Ireland, I learned to love both cultures and I consider myself very lucky to have absorbed the best of both worlds. Both countries have unique history and legends and I always enjoyed reading about them. But if you ask me to choose, my heart goes to the land of the sprites. Last year, and as a tribute to this love I have for my dad’s country, I added two new tattoos on my body - a leprechaun sitting on a red mushroom under the rainbow and a four leaf clover for faith, hope love and luck. Both my parents were really extreme while young, so my tattoos weren’t ever an issue for them. I often feel blessed having the parents I have, especially considering that the rest of my girlfriends had to hide or fight for the liberties I enjoy. There are times I feel the conservative one in the family, imagine that!

My parents are a complicated issue in my mind. I love them both very much and since I am basically an only child I get back double the love I give. But this does not mean that living with them was ever easy; especially with my mum. I do love her, I do, but man she is annoying. The rest of the world would describe her as likeable and very beautiful, even at her forties. She is a sweet talker and apparently her looks wins over even the most demanding and grumpy people. She always gets her way. From the pictures I have seen from her twenties, I must admit she was astonishing. She is a tall and thin brunette with deep black eyes and full lips. She still keeps her hair long and wavy and has a very beautiful melodic voice. She is really graceful and attractive. Unfortunately I am nothing like her, neither my look nor my character. I remember disagreeing with her all my life. I spent most of my childhood in Greece, so I had to go through her second marriage and her second divorce; and although I don’t remember the first one with my dad, it is still there, hidden, fomented. I had to endure all her lonely sad nights and desperations, her lack of good judgment when it comes to men, and the feelings she kept in secret for my dad. Moreover, she was always too protective over me. I know every mum is caring for her child but she was always worried that I would get hurt or something… so much, it felt like she was smothering me. I remember I was feeling sorry for her, angry with her but above all very depressed. And that’s how I grew up…to be sad and mainly irritated!

Emily, my mum, or Em as everybody calls her, used to work a lot. When she met my dad she was studying to be a university lecturer but when she came back to Greece alone, with a four year’s old baby, she decided that the best thing to do, is to have a job that would allow her to keep me close twenty-four-seven, and that is how she decided to open a day care center for kids. I grew up there until I was ten. During my free time after school I either used to help my mum with the babies or do my homework in her office. At the age of ten my mum decided I was old enough to stay home alone after my school and do my homework or whatever. Don’t imagine this was a big thing, as our home was on the third floor of the same building with ‘THE HAPPY SMURFS’. It did however implied more alone time, and indeed I never complained. I never felt the need to be around many people. I enjoy loneliness.

By no means had I ever had many friends. At school I felt a bit detached and since I was so different than Greek ‘brownish looking’ kids I used to be picked up a lot about my hair and my ghost-like skin. It did not matter; I had many imaginary friends, I never needed real ones.

I could spend days without talking, except this usually freaked my mum out, so growing up, I learned how to remember to always reply or even come up with a few words from time to time, to calm her from believing there is something wrong with me. Inside my head there was too much noise; hopes, dreams, nightmares. Since when I can recall my memories, the most joyful experience for me was to paint, to draw, and my mum really found this interesting and indulged it. I remember spending every last moment of my free time over a painting block. I remember my walls having no free space for any new drawing. Usually I could not recognize what I drew; the scenery, the buildings, where all in my mind but I remember my mum looking at them with awe and pride. Maybe this is the only thing that ever made her proud of me; this and getting in the University. Life kept passing by and Greece was ok, but I really anticipated the couple of weeks holidays that I used to spend with my dad every now and then in Ireland.

 

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My dad, Breandan, owned an Irish pub, in the city limits of Galway; a town of hardly seventy five thousand people. When he was young he was studying to be an architect; I guess this is where I got my good drawing hand. Then he met my mum and he fell in love. He devoted himself to her for a few years. It seems that together with the love he lost for her, he also lost his love for architecture. He keeps saying that after the divorce, he did not feel like creating anything anymore, he was lacking the inspiration to do so. So he decided to use his old man’s garage and turn it into a beautiful small pub, mainly for town rock junkies and passengers. I am a big fan of this pub; it feels like second home to me. It is the most relaxing place in the world. I can sit in a corner listening to music all day and dreaming away; sometimes even reading my books or drawing for hours.

I also really love living with my dad. I can understand why my mum fell for him in the first place. He is really attractive, around six feet tall, with light brown hair and deep blue eyes, always a bit unshaven and his body is still awesome. He is exercising a lot, going hiking and running every day and generally he lives a really healthy life; well, if you consider beer good for your health! He has a wonderful voice but he does not speak much and apart from the days that my two Irish brothers invade the house, we can stay in absolute silence for many hours till one of us breaks it. I enjoy these long pauses. I almost can hear my thoughts out loud.

As already clear, my dad also re-married and he made two more kids, and of course re-divorced. But even when he was with Molly, this was his second’s wife name, he had me in a special place in his heart and he showed it to me. I don’t really know my brothers a lot, as they do not visit often when I am there. I don’t think they like me, as I am guessing they knew I was my dad's favorite. I never understood his infinite affection though. I remember the kindness and the sadness he had in his eyes when he was looking at me. I remember he used to take me for long walks and hiking in the fields close to his house and he was trying to teach me the different type of plants, as his father did for him. Even then, I could not understand why he bothered. I could not remember most of the names anyhow, so much for the attributes and the benefits of each plant. I did not mind, I loved spending time with him, listening to his voice. I always wondered though if he loved me so much because of me, or because this was his way of loving my mum.

I have known since forever that they never really stopped loving each other. They used me as an excuse to visit each other for the couple of days or even hours till they drop me back and forth. I could see the air drifting around them every time; I could see the sparkles. They were unfortunately too proud to admit anything. So they stayed apart and the years just kept passing by and I was traveling every few months from my home to my shelter, to my favorite place, Ireland. Just like that I was already in my eighteenth year.

 

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Sometime before my eighteen’s birthday I decided that I did not want to live in Greece any more. Greece is nice, sunny, happy, reckless place, not me though. I decided I wanted to live in UK and that is what I did. I had applied in a University for Fine Arts in Edinburgh and got accepted, so I was getting ready to move there. No big deal, no big fuss; one day I informed my mum I got accepted and I was moving. She was skeptical at first but did not try to change my mind. I was an adult in the end. My only real friend ever had already moved there a year ago from Galway, so I guess that was one of the factors that helped me decide on the city. He also had an extra room in the house he was sharing with other students, I was practically there.

I believe deep in her heart my mum already knew it. I did not fit in Greece. I had to explore my options. So I informed my dad, who was ok with my decision, since it meant I would be closer to him. Then I had to wait. University did not start before September and my dad had a good proposal.

"Maybe you should come here and celebrate being eighteen; we will open the pub, have a band and party. Let’s invite Kellan to come home for the weekend! We should even ask your mum to join us!" If only I knew better! That sounded absolutely perfect at the time. My mum was happy to follow me for the weekend and so the trip was fixed. This is how it all started.

 

Chapter III - The first contact.

 

 

I was planning to go well in advance to spend some time with my dad but I only managed to arrive a day before my mum would. Kellan was there waiting for me when I landed. Kellan was a big chapter of my life.

Both my parents liked him a lot; well there is not much not to like? He is studying in the University to be an engineer and he is so very kind, always a gentleman. He is very tall, more than six feet and really well built. His eyes are the wonderful green of the never ending Irish fields and his hair is so black they almost seem unreal sometimes. He is undeniably gorgeous and open hearted. I loved him so much, more than I loved my brothers, I must admit; which is not that difficult since they hate me and I don’t see them often.

When we first met I was ten and he was just a year older. It was in one of the first trips I had made to Galway and I had nobody apart from my dad to spend my days. I enjoyed staying with him but I was practically alone most of my day, since he also needed to work. It didn’t matter much though. I used to spend time in the fields around my dad’s house. One of these days and as I was wandering in the fields, I saw a huge dog running toward me and I froze. In just some seconds I was lying with my back on the ground and the dog was all over me, shaking his tail, licking my face. I was so scared I almost pissed myself and then I heard someone laughing; I was getting ready to start a fight when I laid my eyes on him. He was small, short and harmless and his eyes were magical. I was so much used to my imaginary friends that for a moment I was fooled to be looking at a midget but no, he was actually real. Lucy, that was the dog’s name, wasn’t his; he was walking her for some pounds. The only thing I could focus on was those green eyes and I knew at that moment that for the first time in my life I wanted someone to be my friend. He came close and gave me his hand to help me stand; he told me his name and I couldn’t help but loving the accent, the innocence and the joyful eyes of him. He asked me for my name and was really interesting in learning everything about me. It was the first time in my life that someone my age was interested in me, without looking at me like I am an alien or something. I appreciated it a lot. Since that day I was spending most of my time in Ireland with him. He had not been outside Galway ever in his life and he enjoyed traveling to Greece through my words, my descriptions and my stories. We had hours of playing around in the woods, walking to the lake and creating different stories or just reading our books and enjoying silence. We made plans to travel the world. We took Lucy out together and then spent every pound buying second hand books from a small old curiosity shop in town. O’ Malley's, best shop ever! I remember the old lady. She was so nice and kind with us. The books in there were unique and the feelings of coziness and relaxation were filling my soul every time I entered that shop.

Around the age of fourteen I spent more than a year away from Ireland. I did not want to visit my father; growing up had made me really depressed and I did not feel like traveling. I was starting to be tall and clumsy and I was ashamed of me, I was ugly. I did not want Kellan to see me like that. He used to send me many annoyed emails and messages at that time. He did not understand why I did not want to see my dad or him but I did not feel like explaining anything. I was really gloomy and miserable. When I finally went to visit, already sixteen, I saw a totally different Kellan. He was seventeen, a full grown up man, very tall and really good-looking, I could not believe it. My dad started thinking, hoping actually, that we would be in love sometime sooner or later but I was just an ugly, clumsy and a bit chubby girl, so I never expected him to like me. Besides I was still seeing in him the short annoying midget that was laughing at me that first day. No way had Kellan liked me and dido. Love was not an option, but our friendship was holding well. That was about to change very soon!

 

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Friday 12:15, April 30th, 2010, Galway airport

 

I walk to the luggage pick up area and there he is, waiting for me to arrive for my big eighteenth party. I am so happy to see him. He looks so nice today. He is handsome as always but also he has a different aura. I guess living alone really works for him. He starts telling me that everything is all set for me moving to Edinburgh, and the guys -he has two more roommates, a twenty years old girl called Sarah from France and a nineteen years old fellow student named Dylan from Manchester- have prepared my room a bit and cleaned a lot, I do not care, as long as I have my own room and I am out of Greece. He keeps going on and on, about the rent being cheap, the bus station being so close, the wonderful castles and the city center that I would love. He is telling me about a really nice bookshop that he spends many hours at and the restaurant they usually eat; how we are going to have long walks and "intellectual" evenings having coffee and reading our books and he actually does not shut up… and all of a sudden I reach up and I kiss him! It is a nice soft on the lips kiss, nothing special but it is actually the first romantic contact we ever have. He is really surprised and he just stands there frozen. I do not know why I did that; maybe just to shut his mouth, maybe because he was so damn gorgeous standing there in front of me, maybe because I am feeling so happy and independent to turn eighteen. I can’t wait for my new life to start. He is speechless finally…He takes my luggage and walks to the car without a single more word.

He drives me to my dad’s house. It’s a short drive indeed but all the way back he does not say anything. Thank God I can fly to Galway nowadays, imagine three hours ride from Dublin without a word…I would die! My dad is at the door waiting for me, to hug me and kiss me and the matter kind of gets in the chimney corner. My dad has prepared lunch but Kellan denies, kindly, and says he will eat with his parents. They are missing him a lot now that he is not living with them. He looks at me really intensively, like he is confused. He does not know how he needs to react. Finally he gives me a hug and off he goes.

I walk upstairs and enter my room to leave my things. I haven’t been in here for more than six months but it is still exactly as I had left it. My dad does not touch anything while I am gone. This room is dedicated to me and nobody enters. Mira, the lady that helps my dad with the house, has cleaned it and changed my sheets, so although it was shut, it is tidy and smells nice. I love this smell. It smells Irish, god I love this country. I take a shower to relax and get rid of all the airport dirt, and get in my pajamas to go in the kitchen and eat, but my mind is travelling back to the airport. I cannot stop thinking about the kiss. Why did I do that? Was it something I need to pay more attention to or was I just fooling around? Where could this lead? I am not in love with Kellan obviously, although it did feel good! I just hope that I did not spoil things with us, especially since I am moving in with him in a couple of months. That would be really weird. He was looking at me strangely. He did not seem so happy and relaxed. I guess it was kind of stupid. Maybe I need to apologize. Later...

Food is delicious and seeing my dad is wonderful. We share our news and he wants to know everything about the University. He talks about the pub and how things are going well lately. It is just like home, even if it's only for a couple of weeks. The most incredible thing in Ireland has always been the naps! I practically pass out once I hit that couch in my dad's living room, right next to the fire place. Probably it is the weather and the heat from the burning woods but indeed it feels very nice and relaxing. Before I know it, it is already evening. I open up the TV only to hear that it is a very sad day for Ireland, as some guy, named Gerry Ryan, is found dead in his apartment. I have never heard of this guy before. In Greece we do not get to see his shows, but it seems it is a big deal for Irish people and I can’t help but feeling a bit down. I decide that since it is my first day here, I have the right to skip bad news, so I close the TV and plug my iPod device to my dad’s speakers. My dad is long gone for the pub and I have the place for myself; I turn the music really loud and Candice’s voice fills the room.

A timeless and forgotten place, the moon and sun in endless chase, each in quiet surrender, while the other reigns the sky....In the wings of ebony, darkened waves fill the trees, wild winds of warning echo through the air...She seems to come from everywhere, welcome to the dragon's lair, fingers running through your hair, she asks you out to play...In all of nature's sorcery, the most bewitching entity, hell can have no fury, like the rising of the storm...

I so love this song, I love the lyrics. Since the first time I heard it, it spoke to my heart. It seems like a message to me. The most beautiful thing I have inherited from my parents is their taste in music. In the early years it seemed like my dad was trying to implant this music in me, by making me listening to the same songs again and again but nowadays I can really appreciate the melody and the beauty of such songs.

The best thing to do is leave the music on and go in my room to decide what I am going to wear; I do not want to look like I am trying too hard. I search my bags for a while and finally dig out my jeans, a black T-shirt and my favorite black jacket. Tomorrow I will wear something special, since it will be my party and all, but tonight I just need to feel comfortable. I will have fun with my best friend in my daddy’s pub, my favorite place in the world, drink a lot and enjoy the music. It is close to 45F outside; ok temperature for Ireland but I am indeed cold, so I take my jacket and my scarf, I put on my gloves and head to the pub. Once I open the front door, I find Kellan there! Sitting on the porch, waiting for me and I freeze, again, as that first day we had met. I cannot understand what is hiding in his eyes and for the first time, since I met him, I realize what other girls find so special in this gorgeous, sexy, smart guy. Today that I can value him as a man and not an annoying midget I find him indeed attractive.

I know Kellan always had a lot of ladies, especially since he moved to Edinburgh and his Irish beauty was unique but it is only this second that I am stung by jealousy. We kept writing to each other and talked about our lives; I always left guy’s details out and so did he, but at the bottom line we know when one of us has a partner, and at the moment none of us does. I split up with my boyfriend about a month ago and lately Kellan seemed a bit overwhelmed by the various partners. I have no time to think anything else as he speaks first.

"Hey pretty lady, how are you? Did you get your Irish beauty sleep?" Oh my god he knows me so well…

"Yeap got some, not much!" Totally a lie…I almost fainted there…

"So explain…"

That’s my Kellan…straight to the point! What does he expect though? An apology? A love confession? I understand that maybe what I did was stupid but I really did not expect to find him here and I lack preparation, I hate when this happens to me. Why has he come to meet me here? Why didn’t he wait to meet me in the pub? Does he want to continue what I started? That should not happen again. We cannot go down that road. I created all this mess and now I need to clarify it.

"There's nothing to explain. Don’t know why I did it….You could not shut up and I was so happy to see you and I did it. I am sorry if it was inconvenient or embarrassing for you."

"So you thought it was a good idea to kiss me to shut up!"

"I don’t know…something like that!" I wish I knew what he is thinking; I hope he is not mad… He takes a long time before he speaks again.

"Ok, no harm done…Nice kiss by the way pumpkin!"

Oh yes, I did not tell you my nickname yet. Well actually only Kellan is using it since he is so annoying sometimes; he says my head is as orange as a sweet pumpkin and therefore the nickname. What does he mean by nice kiss? He is comparing now? How can he be so over it?

"Should we go now? I really need a drink and some nice music. What you listened in there just made me want more!"

How long was he out here? How cute is this Irish accent! I need to stop that…

"You were eavesdropping on me?"

"Uh uh, just your music was so loud; I should have been deaf to ignore it."

Is it really that simple? Is he really ok? Doesn’t he care at all for me? I did not expect that he would be crazy in love with me of course but again, he is so indifferent. It never crossed his mind in the past? Ok, drop it! Better for me; one issue less to think about. I will have fun tonight and tomorrow I will devote the day to my mum, who is arriving, and my party and in a few months I am off for a new life…except that I will see Kellan everyday…with all his girls, every night partying and kissing and maybe even having sex… Well what is this all about? I said I did not care about him. Maybe I was even playing a little bit…what the f*?

"Pumpkin?"

"What?"

"Are you in?"

"In for what?"

"Ok here we go again…I said that Alicia is having a party tonight, at her place since her parents are out of town and I am invited…and so are you " my plus one! Are we going?" Who is Alicia?

"Maybe you go and I will stay at the pub."

"No, we go after we stay at the pub…if you feel like it."

"You don’t need to do that you know. I can take care of myself and stay alone at the pub; anyhow my dad is there…"

"Yeap and usually he carry a gun, so I will not be held responsible for abandoning his favorite person alone, the night before her birthday. We are going together, or not going together, if it’s too much of a problem."

"Ok fine…we go." Again…who is Alicia?

"Who is Alicia, Kellan?"

"Oh, you do not remember her? She is the blond girl from the bakery, next to O’ Malley's."

Oh s**t…Alicia is just drop dead beautiful. And I am in my jeans and a t-shirt. What’s the matter with me? I should not care about these things? Kellan is my friend and I am fine in my jeans, actually I have lost that extra pound I wanted to get rid of. My hair is fine and I smell nice. It will be fun. And if Kellan wants her, fine. Maybe I need to start getting used to this, before I move in with him. Maybe I find somebody else to flirt. In the end it will be a big party. I guess…

Entering the bar I see all my dad’s old friends and everyone wants to give me a hug and a kiss, so Kellan takes his pint of beer and he is off to our favorite table; at the back corner of the pub, next to the window. Once I finish socializing I grab my drink and join him.

"What is this thing you are drinking? Can’t you just enjoy a nice pint?"

"Well that my friend will make me happy before it makes me pee ten times per hour!"

I always had a thing with beer and the need to go take a piss. Vodka on the other hand is not giving me the same need and with the second drink I am already "happy". My dad knows that, so he is pouring more cherry juice than vodka in my glass, but again three or four drinks will do the job and tonight I want to get drunk.

"So tell me about your Uni."

And I tell him. All about the University, about my classes, Fine Arts, and how I hope that I will have time to devote myself to drawing and writing, as I always wanted. About all my fears that I will be average compared to the rest. And he listens. As he always did. We are back to normal. I don’t see gorgeous, mysterious Kellan sitting at the table opposite of me, I see my best friend; the one that knows me better than anyone else in this world, even if we spend most of our time away from each other.

And then he starts telling me about the house, the guys, Edinburgh, how it feels to live alone, his work as a bartender; he is working to be able to pay rent as he has decided to take no money from his parents. And I admire him. Now I understand why this person has been my best friend ever, I respect his courage, his passion, his humbleness…he is my Kellan; my best friend, my brother. And before we know it, it’s already long after midnight…

"So… Do you want to go to this party or you feeling sleepy pumpkin?"

"Let’s go…and stop calling me pumpkin, especially in front of other people. Btw, I will kill you if you bring this up in Edinburgh!"

"You are my pumpkin…no one else needs to know!" He twinkles and I sigh…

We walk directly to Alicia’s house and after the three vodkas my head is already spinning a bit; the clear cold air feels so nice on my face. The house is an old and very big mansion, made entirely out of wood and stone. It stands there manorial and imposing and reminds me of Alicia herself. The garden is trim and the small bushes are shorn in different shapes. You can see statues all around and a small fountain in the middle. It’s not overloaded at all and indeed is really impressive. A woman opens the door for us and I find it quite strange for a family that owns a bakery shop to have such a mansion, not to mention the maid. The inside of the house is as impressive as the outside. You can see vintage furniture everywhere and large frames with portraits of various people. I guess they must be her parents or even grandparents. I would hate to live in such a house as it would remind me of a mausoleum; I prefer smaller residences, like my dad’s home, which is still big though, or my mum’s apartment. However, I cannot deny the fact that this house displays wealth and power. That’s another thing Alicia is way ahead of me!

The party is overcrowded but I do not know, or remember, anyone, so I go straight to the bar to pour myself a drink and give some space to Kellan to socialize. After I prepare my favorite vodka with cherry and then I see her. She is walking toward him, all elegant and sexy. She is hugging him and kissing him on the cheeks. She is damn gorgeous, what in hell do they eat here in Ireland? Or is it the water? She has long blond hair, blue eyes and a model-like body covered only slightly. Her legs seem so well built and sexy and of course you can see a lot of her front! Kellan can have access to much flesh if he just moves his arms around her but he does not. He is standing there like a solid rock, watching her and talking to her, casually. Maybe he is feeling sorry for me being alone here. Maybe he does not want to make me feel uncomfortable. Or maybe not; he knew I did not know anyone when he proposed to come to this party. She laughs and continues touching him and he stands there. I so want to throw something to her beautiful face, like say my drink. Is this what Kellan was aiming for? Making me jealous or showing me how much other women desire him? Fine, I got the point. It is better that I leave the room before I do something I will regret when I am sober. I need some air, so I turn to go out on the balcony and the minute I step my foot on the terrace I feel something different. There is something strange out there, pulling me to it. Someone else is here; I am not alone. Someone I have not seen before. I look around and at the far corner of the terrace I see is his back...and instantly I know. He is here…finally!

He is extremely tall; taller than Kellan or my dad, as if anyone is short here. He has long black hair, the color of ebony that falls in waves on his neck and he wears black clothes. There is nothing identifiable on him from behind but I know he is special. Something is pulling me to him. I approach waveringly and then he turns and faces me. He stares but he does not smile. He cannot be real. No, no way. He is not real! He is a God! I am lost in his sexy, dark blue glare. His perfect lips stay sealed and his awesome body is rigid and tensed. He has the most incredible gaze but he looks dark… very dark. He seems so mysterious and sad thought. I just stare into his eyes and I am stuck. I hear somebody talking to me from behind.

"Tita, are you ok?"

"What?"

As I turn my head, just for a moment, to see it is Kellan, he is already gone. It is like he vanished…evaporated. Where did he go? I scan the people around but he is nowhere to be seen. Did I just imagine him? Am I so drunk? Was I just annoyed by Alicia and Kellan and I created him in my mind? Before I met Kellan, when I was really young, I used to create fantasy friends all the time. Then Kellan covered that empty spot and until today I had not imagined anyone new. Did I really see him? He was way too … divine to be real. These men do not exist in real life. Irritated and confused, I turn my attention back to Kellan who is standing next to me, asking me something.

"What? What do you want Kellan?"

"I said are you ok? Why are you standing out here in the cold alone?"

"I was not alone!" Was I? I am sure he was here. My first urge is to say "Oh, well maybe because I did not want to see you drooling over Alicia any more" but then I am thinking, is this even fair? Didn’t I think it was totally the opposite way? Kellan only stayed there, but she kept touching him, so I decide to let it go and keep calm.

"I needed the fresh air…"

"Do you want to leave? Do you feel sick?"

"No I am fine. Just feeling a bit underdressed in here…"

"Come on…You are beautiful. How many times do I need to tell you?"

When has he ever told me before? I try to think…well the drinks don’t help! I put on my flirting mode and I smile…

"Just once more I guess."

And now it is his time to approach and kiss me. But this kiss is not as mine was. Soft and gentle, this kiss is deep and passionate and breath-taking. His hands are touching my face and then they travel my body lines. It lasts long…and I do not want him to stop, I know it's stupid but it feels nice. I open my eyes and I see Alicia standing inside the house, looking at us and I break free. Kellan looks confused and discouraged, so I try to give him a mental sign and let him know we have company. He puts on his good smile and turns to face whoever this is. Without a second thought he informs Alicia that we are going to leave, because I am so tired by my trip this morning and since tomorrow it’s my birthday and all, we will be at the pub, and she can drop by…it’s an open party. Did he just invite her to my party? Even with a smile after he kissed me? And she is standing there smiling back and telling him she will be there. No, all these did not just happen. I am starting to hear things now apart from watching them.

He grabs my hand and drives me outside the front door.

I barely manage to grab my coat on my way out, and I feel so annoyed. I am freezing now, so I put on my coat and I try to roll a cigarette; yes I smoke! Only when I am nervous…But Kellan seems to have other plans. He puts the partially rolled cigarette back in my pocket and drags me in his arms. He starts kissing me again and since we are all alone in the street his kiss becomes more enthusiastic and strong. And then it hits me, I really don’t mind him kissing me…his touch is so sexy and strong and yet so familiar to my body without having him touched me ever before. His hands fondle me. His arms are all around me and we cannot stop. It’s like I have lost my ability to think clear. I know this is stupid. This cannot keep on going; we need to be just friends if we want to live under the same roof with no problems. But it feels so good.

And then I remember that I am so annoyed by him for inviting Alicia to my party and I push him away. He is watching me like hypnotized and tries to bring me close again and then I start yelling at him, for everything. For Alicia drooling on him, for flirting back, for inviting her to my party, for dragging me to this party just to see him flirt around and I go on and on. He does not say anything but shuts me up with another kiss and this time he is too strong for me to free myself. I have no option but to stay there enjoying it. His kiss is sinfully erotic. Anyhow, tomorrow we will be just friends again and he will not be able to blame me, this is all his doing, well apart from this morning and my jealousy crisis before! I need to stop thinking now and just enjoy this kiss. Maybe it’s the last one we will ever have. Well for sure it MUST be the last one…

After like a really long time kissing me, he pulls back. Just like that! He is looking into my eyes but he does not speak for a while. Like he is evaluating the situation, or maybe reconsiders what he did. Does he regret it? Will he say something…ever? He touches his lips, as he does when he is nervous, I love this habit he has.

"Should I walk you back home?"

"Ah?" I am left there stunned and move less. I try to sound calm. My heart is beating like crazy.

"No it’s fine, I can walk…it’s just two minutes walking and Galway is the safest place in the world…"How do I even say these cool words? Inside me I am still panting!

"Ok then…I guess I wanted to wish you a happy birthday…and tell you I am really happy that we will celebrate them together for the first time."

He kisses me on my nose and turns around to leave. I know he is nervous but this…this is awkward. I am still standing here… What did this mean? This was my present? No refunds I guess…

 

*****

 

 

I watch him walk away and I decide that I need to turn around and start walking as well. I head back home thinking about my strange day when I start shivering. Somehow I have a strange feeling that someone is around, again. A different aura! It is like déjà vu although I haven’t had this feeling for a long time; I don’t even recall when I had it before in my life. But now it is strong, as something inside me is warning me. I turn my head around to see who is there, I am terrified but before I lose it and start screaming Kellan's name, he is standing in front of me, again. Oh my GOD! Am I imagining this? How drunk am I?

I cannot speak of a single word, so I stay there staring at him, like an idiot. He is indeed the most incredible man I have ever seen, or imagined. So beautiful, so magical, but yet intimidating; his eyes are like the deep threatening sea, his lips are red as blood and then he speaks and his voice is melodic and dark; even more dark than his eyes.

"Hello my lady, I am Dubhghall."

He has the strangest accent I have ever heard. It’s partially Irish, but I cannot understand the foreign part of it and then I am thinking I must have heard this name before, because it does not seem new or strange to me. Where do I know it from? My dad used to tell me Irish stories, about the past, myths and fairy tales and I loved them. So who was Dubhghall…I know the name is called Dugal nowadays, as one of my two brothers is named after it, and I try to remember the meaning. And then it hits me…it means dark stranger in Gaelic…I know this because my dad used to tease my stupid brother that there is nothing dark in him, although he is indeed an alien. I remember there were a couple of folklore stories about him but I cannot recall what they were saying. So I keep quite. I do not know if I must speak or the magic moment will be lost. Did he just call me his lady? Oh my God!

"You are Titania. It is very nice to finally meet you in person."

I feel I will faint. He knows my name! He knows me…how? But I still do not talk and then he leans forward and takes my hand and kisses it…like they used to do thousands of years before! Like a soft touch, not quite a kiss…a unique feeling. He touches my cheek with his and inhales deeply. It feels amazing and scary at the same time. He smells like syrup or sweet red wine or cherry juice…I do not know how to explain this unique feeling. Kellan's kisses were very nice, incredible even, but this! This is something coming from another reality! And as I close my eyes to enjoy it, I feel he is gone!

I open my eyes and indeed he is nowhere around. What the f*? I know I swear more than I should, but he should really stop disappearing on me like that! Also now that I re-consider, people should stop kissing me without my permission. Him, Kellan; what is going on? Not that I did not enjoyed it though. Does this make me easy? I sure hope not!!!

I start back home and now I am not sleepy at all. My heart is beating like crazy and I feel my blood pounding in my veins. I want to understand who this guy is. Where does he know me from? Have I seen him before? Where? I would remember him I guess. I have a million questions in my head, so I run home and I head directly to my dad’s library. I am searching his books. My dad has a huge library. I remember he has a couple of big books that talk about the Celtic myths and Gaelic stories. There it is! I start scanning the pages and but I cannot see his name anywhere. I have a feeling I heard a story from my grand mum about him but I don’t really remember, something about the dark stranger; the one that came from a different world, the warrior who fought next to great kings. I am trying really hard to remember a fairy tale my grand mum used to tell me and my brothers. All I remember is scattered sentences. He came in dark clouds with his army and landed on the mountains of Connaught and brought darkness over the sun for three days and three nights. He can walk the Otherworld. I start panicking…I know this myth; I have heard the stories so many times. The part with the Otherworld was always my favorite part. It was my imaginary heaven.

The Otherworld was the world of immortals, the world of eternal life, heaven or hell. Situated on the islands of Ireland, hidden from mortal eyes by strong magic, in some myths it was located in a subterranean fortress called Sid, the ‘Fairy Fort’, while in others at the ‘Land of Youth’, Tír na n"g, which was also the home of Danu and her people 'The Tuatha Dé Danann'. It was also called the House of Dead. Gods and spirits moved from and to the Otherworld and made themselves visible to mortals only under specific situations.

According to Lebor Gabála Érenn, the book of the taking or Ireland, the people of the Goddess Danu came to Ireland from four magical cities of the north: Falias, Gorias, Finias and Murias, in which four druids lived -Morfesa, Esras, Uiscias and Semias, and brought with them four magical treasures or lucky charms, the Lia Fail -the Stone of Destiny, the Sleá Bua -the Spear of Lugh, the Claíomh Solais -the sward of Victory and the Cauldron of Dagda. These four treasures were offered to the people of Ireland. All these myths and fairy tales are so beautiful and imaginary; the different cities, the druids, the kings and the battles. I used to read them every time I came to visit my dad. Suddenly, I feel the urge to reread everything. I miss my grand mum so much now. She could tell me what I need to know. She was really wise and kind. I want to know more about the tradition of this place, of this country. There is a poem about the arrival of Tuatha De Danann in this book. I read it and I feel electricity penetrating my body.

It is God, who suffered them, though He restrained them, they landed with horror, with lofty deed, in their cloud of mighty combat of spectres, upon a mountain of Conmaicne of Connacht. Without distinction to discerning Ireland, without ships, a ruthless course the truth was not known beneath the sky of stars, whether they were of heaven or of earth.

They landed, in a cloud, without distinction or ships; they were from heaven or earth! This poem is so allegorical. Does it speak of people or of gods? The people of Danu were thought to be more than mortals, as the Goddess had inherited in them her wisdom, creativity, and attachment to the earth, along with several magical affinities. They were direful warriors who traveled in the form of mist. Finally, after various battles, they were led to live underground into the mounds. Was it there where the Otherworld lay? Many humans have reported seeing Immortals, even talking to them, but these were the stories, the myths. How can this actually be reality? I keep reading and my pulse is really overwhelming now and then my dad is standing behind me, curious of what I am doing.

"Tita!"

"Oh s**t, Dad! You scared the hell out of me."

"What are you doing here? Are you drunk sweetie? Do you feel sick?"

I close the book instantly and turn around to face him, with what I believe to be a peaceful face.

"No dad. I am fine. Just wondering about something…"

"At three a.m.? Why don’t you go to bed? Tomorrow is a big day…"

"Yeah I know…Kellan was telling me something and I needed to check it out, but you are right. I am going now. Goodnight." I give him a kiss and put the book back on the shelf. I head to the bathroom when I hear my dad mumbling something about strange women! If only he knew!

I put on my night gown, wash my face and get in my bed. All I can think of is his face, the dark stranger, the Otherworld, the land of the dead, the immortals, the fairies. This is the land of the elves I think, everything can happen here. I was never really very down to earth, so all this does not seem completely impossible, which is I guess a bit crazy anyhow. The vodka and the exhaustion do their job and I fall asleep as soon as I lay down; in my dream he is here again. But he is not the gorgeous dark hair man I saw on the street; I see these eyes, his eyes, in all my fantastic friends. All the creatures I have ever imagined painted or just formed in my head and I start seeing this more clearly. I start having this feeling that indeed I have met him before, this aura, this dream. I wander around in a different place. A beautiful place and I see him somewhere in it, but I cannot reach him. It’s like I am floating on air and I feel…happy, and safe! That’s not new… I remember being here. Again, in Galway in my sleep…I remember this.

And I wake up!

 

Chapter IV - The party!

 

 

When I finally manage to get out of bed I see that it’s already half twelve… Oh s**t! I missed my mum’s arrival. I was supposed to pick her up from the airport. Oh s**t! Oh s**t! I go directly to the bathroom and wash up, put on a tracksuit and a T-shirt and I run down the stairs, when I hear them talk. I pause and walk silently in the living room, to find my mum and dad sitting casually, drinking coffee and discussing, like they are best friends ever and I sigh. Then my mum sees me and gets up, we hug and kiss, like it’s not only a day that I have not seen her. So many things happened in that day, they seem surreal to me now in the daylight.

"Happy birthday my love. I wish all your dreams and hopes become your future and indeed it is the future you are looking for!" Is this a wish or a curse, I am wondering.

"Happy birthday sweetie. I hope you know your dad is always here for you. I love you so much."

"I know dad. Thank you both. I am so happy to have my birthday celebration here this year. Thanks mum for coming all the way."

I get my presents and go to pour a cup of coffee while my dad inserts a disc in the disc player. Irish music fills the room and already I feel so happy. I can’t wait for tonight!

Sitting on my dad’s comfortable black sofa, I open my mum’s present first and I am really surprised to see it’s a dress. Well actually it’s like THE dress. It’s a beautiful little black one, with the most incredible back I have even seen. It has nothing special at the front part but once you turn it around the top part of the back is made out of black lace, like spiders have nettled it, so beautiful and sexy; the see-through part stops right above my waistline. I never expected that…It’s only like the best present ever.

"Oh thank you, thank you so much mum. It is the most beautiful gift you have ever given me."

"And it is special indeed my love. This dress is not new. It was mine. It is the dress I was wearing the night I met your father."

Holly s**t! We both turn to face my dad and there he stands, completed stunned and speechless, full of emotions, full of memories and suddenly he turns and disappears in the kitchen. My mum has a satisfied smile on her face which means she got what she expected from him! Well, what do you know? Maybe there is still some hope for these two.

I decide to give him some space, so I stay there with my mum and open his present. It is a pink gold four leaf clover hanging on a leather string, engraved with these four words I so much love and my name at the back. It’s very beautiful, and hopefully it will also be lucky! My day is already much better, so I decide that there will be no confusing thinking today. No Kellan, no Dubhghall, no Otherworld, no myths, no stories. Just me, a normal girl having fun on her eighteen birthdays!

My dad comes in the room, already back to his old self, to inform us that he is leaving for the pub, as he expects a big order to arrive and he wants to prepare for the evening event.

"I will be in the pub until late afternoon so if you want to join me for lunch you are welcome…" this goes to my mum.

"Ok fine, maybe I will do so. Let me check with her first…"and she turns to me and I instantly know the answer.

"Who me? No…I have made plans with Kellan, so you two can plan ahead. I will grab a sandwich afterwards." That is a lie! Of course I do not have any plans with Kellan. I do not want to see him alone before tonight anyway, to avoid previous incidents, so I plan to visit O' Maley's in town and wander around as I used to do. I plan to enjoy a quiet day to myself. Maybe even find a book or two about my 'issue'. I spend some time with my mum in the house and around half two I decide to go get dressed to get going. I put on my jeans and a top, my boots and my green army jacket, I take my bag, my mobile, my wallet with some money and my sun glasses, you never know, even in Ireland, and I head to town.

I put on my earphones to listen to some music and start walking. I pass through the fields where my dad’s house lay. It’s only a ten minutes’ walk to the town but I always used to enjoy this pathway surrounded by nature. Everywhere around there is shrubbery, low plants and small trees and so much green, I start feeling like Heidi, the girl of the Alps!!! I am giggling to myself…Ireland has these unique parks and lakes and at this moment I start feeling so attached to the plant life around me. I remember when I was young I used to lie on the grass and make angels with my arms and my legs, as we do in the snow; it felt like I was creating a special bond with the earth. Well, I guess my mum had something in mind when she gave me the name of a fairy.

Inside the city limits I see the canals that lead to the lake and the port and it feels so relaxing and beautiful. Coming from Athens, with the huge population, all the traffic and the noise, Galway is a paradise for me. I enjoy walking practically to everywhere. You can use a bus or something but there is no reason. I love walking, especially when I am alone and I can enjoy the area undisturbed. I reach the place that I am looking for and once I enter the shop, I see the old couple that owns it. I realize they recognize me too…it must be the pumpkin’s hair! I wave at them and they give me a head bounce. I immediately start looking around in the shop. I go to the library area that holds books about Celtic and Gaelic myths and Irish history and I start reading the titles. I grab a big leather dressed book and I find an armchair to nestle down and start reading. This is another thing I enjoy about this place. It is not an average bookstore that you go, buy your book and leave. Here, you can sit comfortably and search the books for whatever you may need.

 The book recounts the first years of Ireland, or Iwernia as it was called, the Iron Ages and the Celts, the various tribes that have landed the island for many years, the Norse Viking invasions, the Norman’s invasion, the knights and the kings but nothing special that I can connect with the Dark Stranger. This is more of a history book, so I decide to search for something closer to myths, The Celtic Myths and Legends, or Lebor Gabála Érenn itself. I find a book about Irish legends and I rest comfortably in my chair again to continue reading, only this time the content is more exciting. It talks about Danu, the good Gods, and Domnu, the bad gods of Celts but again I see nothing I can relate to him.

After a few hours reading I decide that it is time I go grab something to eat and go home to prepare for tonight. So I close the book and put it back on the shelf, looking for another one to buy when the old lady approaches me.

"You will not find what you are looking for in there." I turn my head to face her and deny that I am looking for something specifically only to hear her saying…

"The Dark Lord appeared to you. He is dark indeed, but in darkness you can find truth and light! Never fear of him! He can walk you through your destiny! He is indeed the one to do that…" It is like she has thrown a glass of freezing water on my face and I can only say…

"What do you mean? Who are you talking about?"

"He, who has many names…he, who walks our land for centuries, he who searches for his lady."

"Dubhghall?"

"Yes, this is the name we call him."

"What other names does he have?"

"The Dark Lord, the Mighty Warrior, the Earth Walker…"

"Who is he? What is he? What else do you know?"

"He is from another world, he was always restless, but lately he is satisfied!"

"What do you mean? How do you know him?"

"I can see him too you know. He appeared to me for the first time when I was really young but I was not what he was looking for."

"How do you know?"

"He used to be really sad! He is not so sad anymore…" Then the old guy approaches and asks his wife to leave me alone.

"Come on Aisha, leave the girl in piece. Don’t believe what she says. Lately she has lost her mind a little bit. Will you buy this book my beautiful girl?"

"What? No thanks. Maybe I come back on Monday!"

I keep looking at the old lady and she does not seem lost to me. She seems aged and wise; like she has seen many things in her life, like my grand mum, only younger.

I leave the store and I keep playing the dialogue with the lady again and again in my mind. I do believe what she says. And this maybe unstable old lady gave me more information than the previous four hours reading. This is one of his names, she says. The one he likes to be called? Who is he searching for? His lady? Which lady? He called me 'my lady' yesterday night. He is from another world. I start panicking now. Crisis attach is on its way. I need to calm down and hold the thought for later. I said today would be a relaxing day! Let’s get out of here.

I enter the first take away store on my way back and I get a big sandwich and a diet coke. I am starving right now… I also get a bar of dark chocolate and go to pay; then I see the cashier. I had not noticed her before, as I am literally somewhere else in my mind, but Alicia is standing there. I am in the bakery shop.

"Hello…"

"Hey I know you. You were with Kellan yesterday at my house."

"Yes, how are you? Great party…"

"Well, I would be better if I had not seen you all over Kellan…"Wow, straight to the point…What is it with people here? No sense of courtesy!

"Yes, I am sorry you had to see that. It was nothing though. Nothing is going on between me and Kellan…"

"You think so? Ha! It’s not what it looked like to me. So, just FYI, Kellan and I used to be together before he left to study and I am planning to regain this…"

"Good for you then. I will not be in your way. I have no romantic interest in Kellan." You can piss off now; I have other issues to worry about…

"Ok, bye then…"

"I will see you tonight…" And that I guess is a threat!

I walk out of the shop and on my way back home, my mobile is ringing…Kellan…Well I guess it was about time he calls. He hasn’t even wished me Happy Birthday. I pick up and…

"Hey pumpkin, where are you?"

"Happy birthday to you too Kellan!"

"I am not going to give you my wishes over the phone. I am standing outside your dad’s house and I have your present. I do not care where you are but nobody is here, so get your butt back here and let me in. Don’t be late!

For f**k’s sake he is so annoying!!! I start walking faster and in five minutes I can see the house. I see him sitting on the porch waiting and he looks so handsome. Today he is also wearing a green army jacket and I can’t help thinking that in Edinburgh we will have trouble separating our clothes. Sometimes we are so much alike. This thought makes me smile and when he sees me he smiles back. He stands up and gives me a big hug. He lifts me in the air and puts his nose in my hair to whisper in my ear…

"Happy birthday my Tita. I wish for crazy love, tones of happiness and great achievements in your Uni. You know I keep you in my heart since that first day we met." And he gives me my present.

We enter the house and go inside the kitchen. I leave my food on the table, still starving, to open his present. It is a very beautiful gold charms bracelet, like the ones you add as many charms on the chain as you want, but for the moment it has only one orange gold pumpkin and one little green gold fairy. I love it and ask him to help me put it on. I can see he is satisfied with my reaction.

"Thank you so much Kellan… for the present, for your wishes, for letting me staying with you in Edinburgh, for keeping an eye on me and being my friend all these years. You know I love it. It’s perfect!"

"Well, it reminded me of you!"

I sigh, but before he talks, I start telling him about my day. I leave everything about the strange man out but I tell him how I went to O' Malley's shop today and how I met with Alicia and she threatened me. More or less I explain that she made it clear she is still interested in him…

"So what?"

"What do you mean so what? You never told me you were together before leaving Galway?"

"I believe you were the one that wanted to leave relationship details out of our news!"

"Hell yeah, but yesterday that we went to her party you could have said something. And then you kissed me in front of her. Was that to make her jealous?"

"If you remember correctly I kissed you again after we left the party, so obviously she could not see us and be jealous about that, huh?"

"Yes but…"

"No but…I kissed you because I really wanted to do that. And anyhow you kissed me first if my memory does not fail me."

"Yes I did, and I said I was sorry…"

"Well, I am not!"

"Ok fine! Enough with this…No kissing from now on. We need to keep things simple if we plan on sharing an apartment successfully…Kellan?"

"What?"

"Am I right?"

He does not speak so I ask again. "Kellan!"

"We will see…Now go put on some music! It’s your birthday. You haven’t eaten, have you?"

"Nope, not yet."

"Ok, put on some music and I will keep you company while you eat…"

I put on some good old Metallica songs, I know Kellan really likes metal music and I start eating. Things get back to normal and I am telling him about seeing my mum and dad this morning sitting together, and the fact that they made plans to have lunch, and how it is the first time after a long time that I see my mother happy and my dad a little bit excited as well, although he is hiding it better! It feels so normal and relaxing to speak to Kellan about my parents. He is my closest person in the world and I could never thought of sharing such issue with anyone else.

With all the talking, it is already eight in the evening and I want to get some rest before I prepare for tonight. Kellan is gone and I am really wondering where the heck my mum and my dad are. They are already too late; after like twenty minutes half asleep on the sofa, I hear them entering the house, making jokes to each other and looking very cheerful. I pretend I am sleeping to save them any embarrassment and I hear my mum going straight to the shower…

After a while I get up and go in the kitchen to find my dad preparing coffee for him, listening to some kind of Irish rock music… I don’t recognize the song but I instantly love it.

…We were halfway there when the rain came down of a day, and she asked me up to her flat downtown of a fine soft day, and I ask you, friend, what's a fella to do, 'cause her hair was black and her eyes were blue, so I took her hand and I gave her a twirl, and I lost my heart to a Galway girl!...

I look at him and I smile as I understand what he is really thinking of. Why on earth did these two people ever get a divorce?

"So everything ready for tonight?"

"Yes my sweetheart. Everything ready…The band that will play is called ‘Black Souls’, you do not know them, as they are local, but they will play you favorite music all night long. A night full of rock! Frank, the singer, has an excellent voice."

"And your favorite music…and mum’s too! It will be great! Thank you so much dad for making all this fuss for me!"

"No problem my princess…"

Now my mum is getting ready in the guest’s room and I ask my dad to hit the shower first. I want to pay extra attention to me tonight. I feel like I am with two friends preparing to go out. My mum and dad are young, not compared to me but compared to parents in general, as they had me when they were in their early twenties, so we always had a more friendly relationship…especially with my dad!

It’s almost ten and both my mum and dad are off to the pub. I promise not to take long so I start preparing and feeling excited; tonight is my night…I need to look fabulous; obviously this is not a simple task, as it is for girls like Alicia, so at least I will cover all the easy parts…I wash my hair, brush my teeth, save my legs, take a nice shower and use body lotion and perfume. I try on my mum’s present and it fits perfectly. It’s a bit short though, as I am taller than my mum, but not so short it would look blatant. The lace at the back is perfect; the fitting is actually very nice. I start blow drying my hair and apply makeup. Tonight I will look like one of these girls that know how to wear makeup and eyeliner. After quite some time I look at the mirror and the result is not so bad. My eyes look bigger; eyeliner always reminds me of cat eyes, my lips are full and slightly red and my hair is not like a big bush. Plus…I actually intend to put hills on tonight!!! I pack my converse in my backpack, together with my black little cardigan, in case I get cold or tired, put on my coat and my scarf and I leave the house. No need for money or mobile tonight…drinks are free, I don’t need to drive back and everybody I love will be there to celebrate with me…I cherish the thought…

I am reserved and keep an eye around but on my way to the pub nothing special happens. No surprises…

I enter the pub and say hello to people, give a kiss to my mum and dad and I head to Kellan, who is sitting at a table with a couple of people I recognize. He stands up to give me a happy birthday kiss but when I approach and take my coat off, I see him looking at me with his mouth open…speechless.

"Are you planning to give me a heart attack tonight? You look stunning...When did you start wearing such dresses?"

"It was a present from my mum…" I turn to face my dad and my mum, who are actually looking at me from behind and in their eyes I see they recognize I am a woman now…They both approve the dress!

"It’s the first time I see you like that. Do you keep all this for your Greek guys?"

"Uh huh, Greek, Italian, Spanish…anything but Irish!" I sigh and give Kellan a big smile but he cannot take his eyes off of me… Now that I look around I see most of the guys in there are looking at me…Well I did not see that coming. Maybe it will piss my dad off! Maybe the dress was too much…

"I can’t believe you are actually making a scene here?" I tease Kellan…

"Well I would for sure make a scene if you were my girlfriend…"

"Maybe that is another reason why I am not!"

"Maybe you should reconsider this…I am offering pretty lady!" I sigh again and go take my drink.

"It looks better on you than it ever did on me!"

"I do not believe that for a second…Dad?"

"It looks equally gorgeous on both of you…Be careful though, I see how everyone is looking at you! I still have my gun in here…" I laugh and give him a hug…

"Now, I would like to drink some expensive Russian Vodka with cherry juice please…"

"It’s on the house!!!"

"It better be, I plan to charge you a lot tonight…"

I stay there with my mum to chit chat and then the group is on stage. Indeed I have not seen them before but as they start, I recognize the song. Placebo is opening the show and although my dear Brian is not here, this guy Frank really earns his spot. He keeps singing and his voice changes to fit everything. Well my daddy was right about him. He is excellent. The song passes and now they are playing Violent Femmes’ Kiss off…I love my dad…he knows me so well… I devote myself to their music and I sing along…I go back to Kellan and sit next to him. He puts his hand behind my back and holds me tight…and I rest there in his warm embrace. Before we finish our drinks my dad sends another round and I turn to blow him a kiss. I see him with my mum, talking closely; they look so much in love, if you didn’t know you would think they can’t live without each other. But they do, they live so far apart; I don’t think there is a chance for them, but at least they can enjoy tonight and maybe even tomorrow.

The party is great, the music is perfect and I have fun with Kellan's friends and then Alicia is entering the door! She comes straight toward us. I smile at her but she does not look very happy to see me next to Kellan. I try to get up but Kellan is whispering to me.

"Do not even think about it. Tonight is your night. There is no one else."

"It is fine; I don’t mind…I'll just sit on the other side of the table."

"If you as much as move, I will kiss you here in front of everyone!"

"Kellan…"

"I will, you know it! She can find another guy to play tonight!" I sigh and smile at him and he winks at me. That is what I like about him the most…he is not the guy that will leave a friend even for sex on the plate…

She sits there, opposite of me looking really annoyed but start chatting with another guy immediately. Flirting actually, just to make Kellan jealous I guess… She is very beautiful as always. Her skin is flawless and her clothes look like they are from a fashion show. She is in a very tight long dress, with an opening up to her thigh and her breasts look firm and full. Obviously the guy next to her enjoys her attention.

"Do you want to hit the bar for some shots? The air is better there!" Kellan seems annoyed but not jealous. I don’t know what to make out of it. We go to the bar and my dad is already preparing shots for everyone, when the band starts playing an old loved one…

Why can't I get just one kiss? Believe me, some things I wouldn't miss, but I look at you pants and I need a kiss.

And I hear Kellan saying:

"This is for you Tita…"

And he looks so deep in my eyes that I feel like he is trying to feel me, touch me. I am afraid he will do something really stupid, like kissing me in front of my parents, so I find it a good idea to grab his hand and drive him outside to avoid any embarrassment. We go to the back of the pub and I turn to face him but before I open my mouth to speak he is all over me.

And we are kissing…intensively…again. He is touching my body… goes on and on…his kiss as before, harsh and passionate, it takes me away, his hands so strong and his feel so sexy…Oh, my God! What are we doing…two days now we cannot seem to stop this…is it just the excitement of the drinks? I start believing…it’s not! How long was this feeling there? Is he in love with me or is he just playing me? Am I in love with him? All these years the love I felt for Kellan was one of the most stable and sheltered things in my life. He felt like a brother to me; an older stronger brother to whom I could always rely on, even from distance. And now we are jeopardizing this…for what? Is it just sexual attraction? Of course I had been with many boyfriends before, but I have never had sex with anyone. I wanted this to be really special…Is he the one I have been holding myself for, even without knowing it?

Shut up and kiss him back I command myself. Nothing more can happen here so at least enjoy this! He stops the kiss and looks at me. I am left there, kind of frozen looking back at him when he drops the bomb.

"You know I love you all my life, don’t you? The thing is that until yesterday I did not know I loved you this way…romantically or whatever you wanna call it. I always thought of you as the best part of my life, as a sister even… but yesterday something changed. Your kiss changed that! And I finally started seeing things clearly… I am in love with you Tita!"

Oh jeeze!

"…but you do not feel the same…"

"I do not know how I feel Kellan. I love you for sure…I do not know how…but I know that I am not ready to be in relationship with you, living in the same house…it will feel strange. Don’t spoil this for us now Kellan…let’s leave things roll and see where this can lead us to." He does not talk. "Kellan?" He comes closer and kisses me again…and now it is more desperate…a bit sad and after a while he whispers.

"Fine, let’s do it your way. I am here for you…always!"

After a while hugging me he decides to go inside, but I need to stay, to clear my head; so I sit on a bench. I am getting really cold and I wish I had my cardigan, when I feel a warm aura around me…It’s like the air is getting electrified…I feel him!!!

He is standing there behind me…and I hear his incredible dark half Irish accent!

"Hello my lady…" I turn my head to face him and as always he is so handsome, but something in his eyes shows he is depressed. He looks so sad that I find myself feeling the need to comfort him. He does not look dangerous tonight, so I decide that this time I will get some answers.

"Hello Dubhghall!"

"You remember my name?"

"Of course I do…"

His eyes seem a bit happier but he does not smile. He preserves his mysterious expression. I am trying to think what is better to ask first. What do I really want to know? Well everything but as he may disappear in like five seconds, I pick the first question that comes in my mind.

"So who are you?" Da...Stupid question I guess...

"I have had many names but I am Dubhghall or Dugal nowadays"

"Yes I got that…How do you know me?"

"I have waited for you even before you were born; I have met you the first time you came to Ireland, you were very young and I have watched you ever since."

"But I do not remember meeting you…" And then he reaches out to me and places his hand on my cheek. Once he touches me, I feel an electric shock going through my body; and now I see him in various moments in my life, having different forms. I see him as a small child I used to see every day on the street outside my house back in Greece, or as the first imaginary friend I had, a wolf cold Simeon, or as the old lady always sitting on a chair outside her house close to my dad’s pub and indeed I am shocked! I know it is him in every shape but I cannot understand how. I remember what the old lady told me back in the shop earlier today:

"He is from another world, he used to appear to me too, but I am not the one he was looking for…"

I decide that I need to ask him, I need to look in his eyes and keep him here with me to explain. I cannot lose him again! I prepare to speak when he beats me in time.

"You see now, my lady?"

"I do. Well I think I do…please stop calling me your lady. I am Tita."

"I know who you are, I already told you so…I know you better than you think…You are supposed to be my lady!" I am very reluctant to believe what he says but I look at him and I know that his sadness is not fake. He thinks about something.

"Where are you from?"

"From a different world?" Should I dare making the question or I will sound stupid or ignorant? I know it seems unreal but this is indeed what my heart is telling me. I cannot keep it any more. I need to know.

"…From…the… Otherworld?"

"Nobody calls it like that nowadays…"

"So how do you call it?"

"Home…"

"And where is this home?"

"Everywhere…You should know better! Where is 'home' to you?" Now I understand what he is talking about…the fields, nature. Earth! The way I feel when I am close to nature. It’s like time has stopped and there is no pub, no Kellan, no mum and dad, just me and him. I do not want to lose eye contact, because the moment I do, he may disappear on me, desperation rises in me…

"You look extraordinary beautiful tonight…"

"Thank you."

"…and I am not going anywhere if you want me to stay!"

I am shocked…

"No way…Do you…? Can you read my mind?"

"No not really…just… I feel things. And now I feel your desperation and agony."

"Can you feel when I am afraid or sad?"

"Yes, which is why I disappeared the other night…you were afraid of me…"

"Intimidated is a better way to describe it."

"Indeed… So what else do you want to know?"

"Why are you here?"

"I am here to see you. I know you have initiated your change tonight."

"What change?"

"You have changed to a woman, my lady. I wanted to wish you…"I expect him to say Happy Birthday, and I find the situation so ridiculous, when he says…

"Welcome…and beware!"

"What do you mean? Welcome where?"

"Welcome to my world. This new life you will live."

"Which new life? I have a life. Beware of whom, or what?"

"You will find out in time. Until we meet again..." He is putting his strong arms around me, drag me closer to him, his hug is infatuated and possessive and then he kisses me. Initially he is kind and sweet, but as I kiss him back, he is encouraged. He is kissing me with more passion than anybody has ever kissed me before. I love his way. For the first time in my life I feel the desperate need to be connected to somebody, to really feel him. In my mind I beg for him to stay. I want him here with me. Don’t go! I am thinking and as he speaks…his words touch my heart;

"Now that I found you, I am not going anywhere. We will separate for now but before you know it I will be back close to you! But you should know that if you choose me, you are my lady…and I am in pain every time somebody else is touching you…I don’t like that!"

Should I feel threatened? Is he talking about Kellan? No s**t Sherlock! I really don’t care of much right now apart from him. I really need him to continue kissing me. I am so taken away by his touch, by the feel I get from his aura, by him. He is the one. The one I have been waiting for, all my life. I know that now. There is no one else. And I start having a stressful feeling. I start panicking…what if he is gone and I don’t see him again? I don’t want to just enjoy this kiss, as I did with Kellan, in case it is the last one. I do not want this kiss to be the last one. Time passes, and we are standing there kissing and touching and feeling each other and indeed it is like I have been doing this my whole life; like I was meant to do this. To meet this guy…To love him, to cherish him…His kiss is so sweet and intoxicating. It is like getting high on something really strong. Will this addiction ever stop?

He pulls back and gives me another, softer kiss; he looks in my eyes and I see his promise. He will be back. And I sigh…I let him go whispering;

"Please come back soon!"

 

*****

 

 

I go back inside to find nothing has changed. I have lived these wonderful moments with him and I feel different but for the rest of the people, everything is exactly as it was half an hour ago. The rest of the party goes smooth. Kellan is holding back and after a while I really feel like sleeping, so I walk back home. My dad has stayed to close up and my mum offered to help, so at least they will have fun tonight! I really don’t want to think about that now or I may even puke…Ewww!

I undress and go straight to bed…Tomorrow I will be like a little panda with my eyes totally messed up but tonight I do not care…I close my eyes and wish to dream of my dark stranger…

 

Chapter V - A new world!

 

 

In my sleep I feel the sun is rising… the flowers are thriving, I smell sweet humidity and aroma; I open up my eyes to see it is early; half seven in the morning. Oh s**t, why am I up so early?

"Go back to sleep Titania." I murmur to myself.

After almost four more hours I wake up and I feel strange again… Maybe it’s the drinks. Did I have too much vodka last night? I get up and go to the bathroom. I pee, wash my hands, wash my face, de-make up, look myself in the mirror and am I different? What is different on me? I do not seem awful as I expected. I seem fine. Nice actually. My eyes are bigger? My lips are fleshier; my hair is not a mess. That’s a first! Could I still be drunk and imagine this? What happened here? I also feel different though. I feel the cold air blowing outside; the soft touch of the sunbeams coming in from the bathroom window; the spring touch on the flowers, what the hell? I even feel the dust jots touching my skin. Is this real? I think I need some coffee and a painkiller. Do I need a painkiller? I always used to need one after drinking but today I actually don’t. I do not have a headache. Not at all; my head is fine. As already said; what the hell?

I go down the stairs; the house is empty. No sign of mum and dad sleeping. It really feels empty. No human presence in the house. Where did this come from? Human presence? What am I then? Something is going bad, really bad. Could I be dead and I haven’t realized it? Usually in the movies it is the dead person that has such an experience. Another crisis attack comes…what did the school advisor told me last time? Think of happy thoughts. My dad, Ireland, Kellan, the dark man…One, two, three, four, flowers, five, six, seven, the University, my own apartment, eight, nine, stop that, breathe, ten. I am sure everything will be fine. I am sure I will solve everything out. Make coffee, have some breakfast, I will be fine. Make coffee, make coffee, make coffee!

After I relax, I go in the kitchen to prepare my coffee and my bowl of cereal. I pick up what I need and go out to find my parents sitting on the wooden kiosk my dad had carved for me some years ago; I remember I used to complain about not having a place to eat or rest in the backyard, so for a whole summer he was preparing it and next time I had a wooden kiosk and an hammock, a gorgeous swinging bed. Now they are sitting there having their coffee, talking and laughing. When I approach, they stop talking. The both look at me really oddly; like examining me.

"What?"

"Big night yesterday ha?"

"Good morning to you too…"

"Are you ok my sweetie? You seem strange…"

"I am fine dad, thanks."

"Spit it out then…"

"Mum…"

"Come on honey, you are eighteen now and we both saw how Kellan was looking at you!"

"Should I bring my gun?" I see that they are both in a very good mood and I can’t help wondering if they slept alone last night!!! Dad is teasing me of course, but the truth is, I know how protective he is and I really don’t want them to know anything about what is going on the last two days. I am not talking about D of course; this is out of any discussion, but not even for Kellan.

"Nothing happened, mum, dad…really. I had a great time with Kellan, and the other guys, and I was so happy you were both here. It’s the first birthday I remember, that I have you both with me."

They look at each other and smile but they don’t say anything. So I sit down and start eating my breakfast. My mum is caressing my hair and suddenly she says…

"Indeed you look different today. You were always beautiful but today you are glowing…I thought it was love but if not…"

"It’s not love mum…"

"Then becoming an adult really works for you…"

I smile with my mouth full and it’s not a nice picture! I ask what time is my mum’s flight and if she wants me to take her to the airport but my dad jumps in and says he is going to the town this afternoon anyway, just before he opens the bar; he can give her a lift… I look at them now and I am actually able to see the air around them drifting, as it always did. I can sense something, like I know what they are thinking; only I do not know…I experience it. What did D said yesterday? He can understand what is in my mind from my feelings. What is going on with me? Is this what he meant? How can this even be possible, is that contagious? I need to behave normally now. I do not want my mum leaving for Greece worrying about me. I can spend time understanding what is going on with me later, when I am alone. I sit and chat with them for a while.

"Ok, so your flight leaves at four, what would you like to do now mum?"

"Let’s finish our breakfast and go hiking…" Of course this is something my dad would say.

"That’s a wonderful idea…"

"What?" That's definitely something my mum would NOT say! What’s the matter with these two? Hiking…my mum?

"Nope, nun, no way… I just woke up and I plan to spend my time here resting, I am not going walking around. You two can go, I’ll stay here and rest in my hammock reading a book…"

"Ok fine…just for a quick exercise walk…are you in Em?"

"If that’s ok with Tita?"

"Go go…"

They look at each other and I sigh; they do not seem to pay attention though; they get ready and leave. I am left there alone…finally actually. Some privacy! I go in the house to leave the dirty dishes and on my way out I find myself grabbing a small quilt, my dad once bought to fit my hammock, but it’s more out of habit. Suddenly I realize that I feel the cold air but indeed I am not cold at all. I can even take off my cardigan and be in just my T-shirt and it is still fine. I don’t understand how this can happen. I have always been cold in Ireland, or even chilly and now…nothing! It’s strange. However, I do not plan to spoil my limited alone time thinking about all the crazy things in the past couple of days. At least for now it all feels positive, so I rest in my swinging bed and open my book. Since I am staying here for another two weeks, I will have plenty of time to figure out what is going on and of course enjoy some time with this new man in my life… I think of him and I smile. I miss him. He promised to be back soon…it is not soon enough I guess!!!

Once it is really quiet, I start realizing that I can hear something around me, like the leaves moving with the wind. I look but there is no one there, I am imagining all this I guess, so I do not pay any more attention. I am wondering where my mum and dad would be now and suddenly I have a vision of them in the middle of a green field making out. Ewwww, I do not want to see that. How can I see them? Dubhghall said he could only feel what is in my mind. I guess, every thought is causing a reactive feeling in our brain and this is how he can manage to understand what you think. But apart from sensing their experience, I actually see them. It is like I am living this through their feelings and I understand what they are doing…as I already said ewwww! I so do not want to feel that… but it is strange. It is like every pore of my body, every cell of me is like a receiver. Like the wind and the sunbeams transfer information to me. Like someone is whispering in my ear and I am terrified. I run to the house quickly, as if by getting in and closing the door behind me, I will be safe. The whispering stops, the images are gone for the moment but this strange feeling of being somehow different is there… Ok, let me think.

D said yesterday that I changed into a woman and that I should beware and welcome, welcome where? His world he said. This morning I started feeling strange about things and people around me and I look better. I do not feel the cold but I can feel the wind and the sunbeams, I hear things, like someone is whispering to me and I can experience what people feel and do, well at least for my mum and dad! I am wondering if I can do that for Kellan also. I go out again and sit on the stairs of my dad’s porch. I am focusing on Kellan and no, I do not feel him! Nor do I hear something. That’s good…maybe I was getting paranoid before. I walk to the hammock again, this time just to take my book, and once my feet are on the grass I get his picture; he is outside his house in his garage feeling sad, he is doing something with his bike and he misses me, he feels really ashamed of something. Hey! S**t, I do feel Kellan when I am attached to the ground, to earth? I turn and go inside again. Now that is a problem. What will I do? Who will I tell? Only one name is in my head, Dubhghall. I need to find Dubhghall…well actually he needs to find me. Where is he during the day? What is he doing? I have only seen him during the night before.

A couple of hours later they are back.

"Titania?"

"In here…" They both have the look of content and happy people. They make jokes to each other. I guess it was true. What I saw then.

"We thought you would be outside."

"I was a bit cold…"

"Hey let’s start a fire till your mum prepares her things…"

"Ok dad…"

Now I am sitting there next to the fireplace and I am hypnotized by the flames licking the twigs and the wood, and it’s like I am seeing little fairies dancing around the fire. I am losing it for sure. I am so wrapped in my thoughts. How can this be happening? Why is it happening to me? I don’t have any conscious connection to facts around me.

My dad is gone, taking my mum to the airport. I waved goodbye to them without even noticing when they left. Then he will go to the pub; I promised to meet him there for dinner, since we are only the two of us now but I have plenty of time before I need to move. So I sprawl on the sofa, lost in my thoughts and watching a stupid TV show I fall asleep.

I wake up and I look at my watch; although it felt like a really short time, I see it is way past eight in the evening; it means I have slept for more than five hours. No way, I used to have long sleeps here but this is too much! I am really hungry now, since I have not eaten for so long, so I start preparing quickly to join my dad and have dinner. I get dressed, put on black tights and a top and having my army jacket on, I leave the house. Once I am out I feel the air and the scent of the wet earth surrounding me, entering all my pores. They fill me with happiness and power, a good sleep is everything I guess…so I walk to the pub and before I enter I notice that in the peace of the night I hear the whispering again, only now it is like someone is calling my name; it is not scary, it is tempting and interesting…

I enter the pub to find Kellan sitting with my dad on the bar, waiting for me. I play cool. Anyhow it’s nice to have his company during dinner. It can keep my mind detached from all this…He looks a bit different today. He looks guilty of something. Maybe he regretted what he told me yesterday night. Well I am not going to open this subject for sure.

"Hello Kellan…"

"Hi Tita. How are you?"

"Fine thanks, I have been sleeping most of the day, so really tired less!"

"Good…"

"What were you doing all day?"

"I was fixing something on my bike…It made a strange noise. Now it’s fine though…it just needed…bla bla bla…" He keeps talking but I do not listen. I am stuck to the part of fixing his bike. So I actually had a vision of him. I did see him before.

"Tita?"

"What? Sorry, I lost focus…"

"I said where do you want to eat? Will we go to our table next to the window?"

"Yeap that’s fine. Dad will you join us?"

"Yes honey in a while…"

We settle down at our table and my dad is sending us a diet coke for me and a pint of beer for Kellan. I guess no alcohol for me tonight! Well, anyway I need to have a clear head for the meeting I plan to have later! I don’t know if I should initiate such a discussion with Kellan but I need to know…

"Were you sad Kellan?" The question finds him totally unprepared; at least he will tell me the truth.

"What? When?"

"Before, I don’t know…the whole day; where you feeling sad?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

"I do not want you to be sad…"

"Or else?"

"Not or else…I cannot do anything to fix it, if I am guessing right about the reason you are sad, but I still don’t like it…"

"Yes I was, I was a little bit sad…but now that I see you it’s better. I was afraid we would lose what we had because of how I treated you…"

"How do you think you treated me? Apart from tenderly!"

"I treated you like a girl I can fall for. I treated you like a girl that could fall for me…and obviously you are neither. So I did not treat you as I should…"

"Kellan I enjoyed what happened last night…and the night before for what it matters, but it is not the smart thing to do…"

"Smart?"

"Let’s not talk about it again…let’s just spend time as we used to…before all the kissing…"

"Fine…"

"Fine…I love you; you know…even when you are so annoying!"

"Love you too…you are never annoying!"

"Kellan!"

"Ok really fine…let’s eat."

My huge dinner is here. I gulp down my burger and my salad and my fries and it is so delicious…Miss J, the cook here, has made a perfect job. Thumps up for Miss J!!!

 

*****

 

 

In about half an hour I have finished my dinner and I am looking forward for the dessert. I love hot apple pie with custard and as I never have it in Greece, I do not mind for the extra calories now. We are having casual conversation with my dad and Kellan. It is Sunday and the pub is not very busy. I plan to walk home alone to have the chance and meet up with D, if indeed he decides to appear today. My dad doesn’t get home before one or half one in the morning, so just after eleven I make goodnights and start for the door. Kellan is on his way to join me. I want to avoid him tonight, otherwise there is no chance I see D, so I am telling him I am going straight to bed. Finally, he decides to stay for a drink with a couple of his friends that have arrived in the meanwhile. Good for Kellan…good for me!

When I exit the door I see Alicia entering and she is giving me a very strange eye. She smiles but it is not a good smile. She says something like 'just in time'. Hell yes, she is just in time to drool on Kellan. My God, this girl is cheeky. Anyhow, I am not going to spend time or energy thinking about her. I start walking back home really slowly, trying to open up and leave my senses free to enjoy the night and then I start feeling excited and impatient. I know I am alone on the street, so I call out for him. First with a lower voice; I guess I do not need to scream. If he can feel me then he can also feel this.

The wind is transferring his name far away, for me; I look around and in the dark of the night the trees seem alive. I reach home, sit on the wooden kiosk and call out for him again. This time I call his name a bit louder and try to really focus my mind on him. All of a sudden, he appears from behind a tree, walking straight towards me. I cannot stop smiling. I know I must look like a stupid, romantic, little girl but I do not mind; all I think about is how gorgeous he is, how extremely handsome and attractive and how he is mine…at least for now. He is wearing black clothes again but nothing identifiable or special; just a t-shirt and a pair of black jeans and although they don’t look old or torn or from another age, they look basic and simple, clothes that you wouldn’t notice. I can’t help but thinking that this man can go really unnoticed, if he likes to. I can’t stop wondering if there are others like him unseen among people. How many others? I need to ask him so many things but they can wait. For now I only want to hold him. He is here for me; he is going to kiss me…

Just in a flash he is standing in front of me in very short distance and my heart aches from agony and desire. Without a single word, he takes me in his arms and we start kissing, there on the bench and then on the table and I do not want him to stop. His passion and strength is unique. The way he handles my body is extraordinary. He lifts me up with no physical effort or pain. Please never stop kissing me. His arms are all over me, his hands are touching me everywhere and it’s then that I realize that I want him to be my first one. My first and last and only…It’s only him for me. I do not want to wait anymore. I am eighteen now and I know most of the girls of my high school have already lost their virginity. Until today I never thought of it really. It crossed my mind from time to time but I knew it was always with the wrong case of man. But now…this is the right one!

Suddenly, he is pulling back. He bows his head, as he is having second thoughts; like he has done something really wrong. I am left there a bit ablaze and even confused, when he starts apologizing.

"I am really sorry my lady…"

"For what?"

"I shouldn’t have gone this far but I am so attracted to you. I have been waiting for centuries and now that you are here I don’t seem to be able to hold back my feelings, my need for you...The way you also feel and think of me make it even harder…"

I am flushing now, as I am thinking I really need to restrain my thoughts when he is around. It is so embarrassing but still, I do want him…a lot!

"I do not want you to withhold. I want you to kiss me again. I want to be in your arms and stay there. It feels good and safe…"

"I am not here just to be your lover my lady…The fact that you want me is an extra benefit for me, but I am here to be your protector, your fighter, your partner in the long path you have to walk…"

"Can you please explain? Tell me what is going on? What do you mean? Which path do I need to walk?"

"You do not need to walk any path; you need to choose if you will walk it and if you do I will be there standing next to you…always."

"If this path includes you, then I am walking it…"

"My lady, this is not funny! It is not something to be taken lightly. You live in the now and it is fine, but the time is coming that the past will try to revive! By then you should have chosen your path…will you lead?"

"Lead what?" I need so many explanations but I understand he is reluctant to talk to me; to be open with me.

"Who are you really Dubhghall? What are you? Please talk to me. If it’s not you then who will explain?"

"I want so much to talk to you about all this but you need to understand your nature first. Look into your family’s roots, your history and look for the lady that connects the two worlds…Once you know who you are, I will be there to help you choose, if you want me by your side. Whenever you need me call out for me. I will be there…"

"But only at night?"

"I am always somewhere around but I can have this form only after the sun sets."

I start feeling anxious now and really worried. He is leaving me again? I don’t want him to leave. Suddenly I realize that now that I have met him I don’t miss my lonely time that much…I reach up and kiss him again and although he is not unwilling, he is not carried away either. It is like he is indeed limiting his passion. I don’t want to impose myself over him, so I stop the kiss. I am feeling a bit disappointed.

"The sooner you find out the truth the sooner we can be together. You should keep in mind though that I am not as pure as you want me to be. I have been dreadful and lethal in the past. I will never harm you, but if you find the truth and decide to never see me again, I will not hunt you down. I will respect your choice."

"What are you talking about? I have never felt safer in my life than when I am with you. I will never leave you."

"I can only wish my love."

"Will you stay with me for a while?"

"What would you like me to do?"

"Stay here. Lie next to me."

"Let me carry you to your room if I am allowed to enter."

"Please do so…"

He is scared. He does not want to be the one to tell me the truth, because he is afraid I will reject him. How can I ever think of rejecting him? Since I met him, he is all I can think about. It is like I have known him since forever! He is mine and I am his. I will let him know of that the next time I see him. First thing first…tomorrow morning I need to do some more research! I am so lost in my thoughts and without knowing it I fall asleep.

 

Chapter VI - Revelations

 

 

When I open my eyes, it is already five past ten. I see I have slept with my clothes on. I remember Dubhghall putting me in my bed and giving me a soft goodnight kiss, wishing me for a dreamless sleep and then I do not remember anything else. Did I sleep instantly after that? I feel refreshed and full of energy. I am thinking of breakfast and at once I am out of bed. I re-dress to put on my jeans and my favorite black converse. I wear a top I had bought some time ago, just for fun, with the motto ‘Beware…Queen B***h inside’ and it actually seems hilarious with everything that is going on in my life. I go in the kitchen and prepare my breakfast. I want milk and honey and fruits and some muesli and I realize that my appetite is getting bigger every day; the last thing I needed now is to put on extra weight. I need to reduce my food…well I will eat now what I have prepared, it’s a shame to waste it, and I will start the diet from lunch time!!!

Having a really good breakfast, I go out to find my dad carrying woods in the yard. I volunteer to help him, as if I could ever carry anything, and he does not want to reject me, so he points to a pile of smaller sticks. I lift one up and in fact it seems quite light. Hm… Am I getting extra powers here? Interesting. I try with a couple of them, bigger ones, but still they don’t seem too heavy to carry. I am thinking I need to hide my enthusiasm, by no means should I start carrying around woods as they are matches. My dad will understand there is something different in me. I don’t want him to freak out. I probably need to get out of here anyway. I was thinking to go back to the old curiosity shop and find the old lady. Maybe she will tell me something more. And if not, at least I could find a book to buy, like The Book of Invasions or something. I tell my dad I won’t be long, I need just a couple of hours and I am off.

 

*****

 

 

Entering the old shop, I see the lady sitting at the cash register, with her husband next to her and I understand that now is not the time to go to her. I go to the back of the shop and start reading the titles of the books, as I did last time, only to find a new addition on the shelf. It is not a new book though; it seems like somebody has put it there. I start getting intensive feelings and thoughts. It is strange; it is the first time I can do that when I am not connected to nature. Maybe my power is growing, or maybe it has to do with fact that I welcome it now. I understand that the lady is frustrated; she wants to come speak to me but her husband is watching her. There is something strange here. Why would he have a problem with her talking to me? I focus on him and I hear him thinking it is too dangerous. I am too dangerous. The Queen said she should not get involved or she will suffer. Which Queen would that be? He is afraid for her. He loves her deeply. He is wondering if I know something about his wife; about her being the connection; about the two worlds. I am bombarded by their thoughts and I try to focus and make some sense out of them. As I am standing there move less, I feel her hand on my shoulder. I turn to face her, when I see her husband locking the door and vanishing behind a curtain.

"Follow me child please."

Speechless, I follow her, as she opens a secret door behind the library and she is leading us in a smaller room with a round table and a couple of chairs. The table is covered with a tablecloth of deep blue velvet and the walls are painted purple. This room has no window, no decoration, and no curtains; only a thick soft carpet of blue color. It is the darkest room I have ever been in my entire life, but although it is lightened only by a few candles, I can see really clear.

"Please sit down my child and ask me whatever it is you want to know."

"First of all let me thank you for taking the risk your husband thinks you are taking. What risk is this?"

"I may lose my affinity. My connection to the two worlds, and once I am mortal again I may suffer physical and mental pain. Nobody I know of has ever survived losing his affinity."

"Oh! So you are immortal too?"

"No my child, I am a semi mortal…I am not dying any time soon but I cannot live the life of an immortal; as you may see I am aging…"

"Immortals don’t age?"

"They age until they reach adultness, immortal adultness this is, and then they stop. This is a gift for creatures existing in the Otherworld."

"Are there many...immortals?"

"Indeed…"

"Are they evil?"

"What would you think of yourself?"

"I don’t know…I am not a saint but I am not that bad either I think…"

"It is the same for all of us, mortals and immortals, we have purity and evil inside; mixed in different portion each I guess."

"What is it that you do exactly?"

"I transfer knowledge and information between the worlds. I have walked both worlds for many years and I have the right 'connections' as you would say."

"And what is the message you need to transfer now?"

"There is no message for you now my child…You came to me! I had once met your mother when you were young and I tried to help her release you from your destiny. I had delivered a message for you then. You would live in silence and peace, have you not known anything; but I guess there is something stronger calling you to your nature…your people…"

"My people? I have no people."

"You will learn everything in time my child. You will meet them all…You need to know your past first. Open up… liberate… Sense the change and welcome it. You are different and you have a great supporter already."

"You mean Dubhghall? You told me last time he carried darkness…"

"I also told you that in darkness you can find truth and light. He has been good and evil in the past. He has lived many lives and taken as many as well. But for you he will always be your shelter, if you choose him."

"I do not have a choice…I think I love him! Is this even possible? I know him only for some days."

"I know you think you do but you will also love another one…of different nature. Maybe once everything is revealed your heart will lead you differently than you think…"

"Who do you mean? Kellan???"

"All you need to know now is that your destiny has taken a different path than the one you had a few days ago…Many facts have led to that. You need to learn your past, communicate with your tribe, and connect with your protector. You have less than a few months. If you decide to embrace all these you may have a chance to change the future of this world. If again you decide to cast them, visit me and I will delete everything from your mind."

"What is going to happen to the world then?"

"Honestly, I do not know. The Samhain festivity may mean nothing to mortals but the immortals were preparing for this for many years. These, who had been banned to live underground, only demand their fair chance in the upper world."

"What is the Samhain?"

"It is the entrance to the second part of the year. The darker part. It is the greatest Sabbath. A festival to celebrate the lives of those who have passed on, the time to pay respect to elders of the faith and other loved ones, who have died. It is the time when the two worlds are divided by the thinnest veil; the changing point between light and darkness. It is the beginning of the New Year."

"New Year?"

"Their new year! They do not follow the Christian Calendar; they do not recognize Jesus Christ as they savior."

"When is it then?"

"November 1st."

"And I need to stop them?"

"No child you cannot stop them, you need to lead them bloodlessly with purity and kindness."

"Why me?"

"I was wondering when you would ask me of this… You were born at the beginning of Beltane. The beginning of this part of the year which is light and fertile, along with your bloodline brought the Goddess closer to you and she blessed you with the connection to Fay. You are exactly the opposite of Samhain. You can balance good and evil. And you have royal blood inside…your family withhold great secrets."

"You said so many unknown words here. What is fay?"

"Nature…I know you always felt this. Even when I first saw you as a child, you had the ability to see what other humans don’t."

"What is Beltane?"

"The festivity for light and fertility. The entrance to the other half of the year. The lighter part."

"When is that?"

"Beginning of May, when you were born."

"Which Goddess?"

"The Mother Goddess of us all!"

"You need to go now my child. I know Eoden keeps an eye outside and in this room we are not visible to anyone but indeed there are many eyes watching us. Keep what you believe most precious to yourself, if you are not sure who you are revealing it to."

"One last question please…"

"Tell me…"

"What am I?"

"You are different."

"Am I an immortal?"

"Yes."

"A vampire?"

No. Why would you ever think that? You are indeed of immortal nature, but you were not created, as a vampire is. You were born with the gift; with the blood! You are much more than a vampire. You should not restrict yourself with such definitions though…Immortal nature can take various forms and in all of them you can find interesting aspects."

"Like what?"

"Well the world has known vampires for a long time but there are other undead creatures hiding in the dark. They may seem beautiful and harmless but they are not…not always!"

"Thank you so much for helping me out and again I am sorry for your risk. I really am!"

"Don’t worry about me. And also, if you want my advice, you should stop wearing this T-shirt…not everybody has a wicked sense of humor!!!"

And just like that she breaks the ice and the formalities and it seems, as if everything she told me is small talk you have every day with your grandmother. I thank her again and on my way out I give her a kiss on her cheek. I know I will meet this woman again in my life; I am already feeling really grateful to her. She smiles at me and I smile back when she says...

"Above all you are still a very good girl!"

I sigh and leave the small shop only to see them hanging the closure sign and disappear at the back. I go out in the street and put on my glasses, despite the fact that there is not much sun; the darkness in there must have affected my eyes. I walk back to the house and all I can think, is that this old lady is the only person until now, that has given me straight answers for so many things. Was she for real? Could any of this just be lies? I know they could. They could be the talk of an insane woman. They could, but they are not. I know. I can embrace all these because they seem closer to my reality than any other explanation I could give. Still what I do not understand is the how!

I am of immortal nature. How can this be? How can I be immortal? My parents are not. They seem young but they are aging far after eighteen obviously…I need to find information about my family. Both Aisha and Dubhghall told me that. Could I really ask my dad? Would that freak him out? Is it even my dad’s family or is it from my Greek part? My mum would definitely freak out. Aisha told me she had met my mother and spoken to her. She has never talked to me about that. I may ask her sometime. I guess now should be the time for me to start panicking again, but on the contrary, no crisis attack is knocking on my door at the moment. The news do not seem so out of this world to me. Deep inside I always knew I had something different. Maybe I just waited for someone to confirm it.

I reach the house only to find my dad gone…what time is it really? I look at my watch and I see it is already half two in the afternoon, so much for not being late…I missed my chance to talk to him for today. Most probably he will spend the rest of the day at the pub. The phone is ringing.

"Hello…"

"Hi pumpkin, how are you?"

"Hello Kellan. I am fine thanks."

"Where have you been lost?"

"I was chopping wood with my dad this morning and then I went to town for a walk…" I hear him laughing really loudly and I start getting annoyed.

"Why are you laughing?"

"I am imaging you with an axe!"

"I did not actually cut them, I only carry them…" He is laughing again…so annoying!

"Sorry sorry, again the image is hilarious…what did you carry? A match?"

"If you must know, I did help him out with light sticks…anyway, did you want something or just called to laugh at me?"

"Did you cut a finger this morning or something?"

"No."

"Then you could have called me all day but you didn't!!!"

"And again, what would you like my dear friend?"

"I am coming over to spend some time. It is like I have not seen you at all since your birthday."

"Ok fine. Bring lunch, I am starving."

"Fine. CU in a bit…"

"I guess I cannot miss you either!"

I was not planning on Kellan's visit but I welcome the change, and the forthcoming food. I am a bit tired from all this supernatural issues and I still haven’t met Batman, maybe in reality he does look like Christian Bale, I would so much love that! I am giggling to myself now and it is indeed remarkable the fact that I have courage to fool around with all these issues in my head. Well, I am partially Greek, so I am excused to say "I will deal with it later".

I go in the room and open the TV. I find some stupid show, about some really brainless people living in a house full of cameras and I can’t believe how insightful G. Orwell was, when he was describing the big brother, only these silly people are in there by choice. Where is this world really going? I decide to watch a movie and I remember that I have with me an oldie, my favorite movie of all times, Reality Bites. I put it in the laptop, my dad does not own a DVD player, actually he does not watch any TV, so I guess he really doesn’t need one. I know Kellan will whine; it’s not that he does not like this movie, but if you ask me, I think he is jealous of Ethan Hawk looking all gorgeous and sexy, or maybe he is jealous of me drooling all over the laptop every time Ethan appears. I don’t mind. It’s the best way for me to be carried away for a while. Kellan, and the food, is finally here, so we sit comfortably on the sofa with our big sandwiches, so much for my diet. After a bit of disagreement, as always, Kellan finally decides this is a fight he never wins and the movie is on…We finish our food and lying there on the sofa, after Ethan is back from the funeral of his dad, so sad btw, and making a love confession to Winona, I fall asleep; in Kellan's hug.

 

*****

 

 

I wake up after a while to see that Kellan is also taking a nap, having a smile on his face. I am wondering what he is dreaming of and as I pay extra attention to the thought I am in his dream; not as myself but as an external observer and I feel he is really happy. I see him making out with me and then he turns around and he is making out with Alicia! I guess this is a good reason for any man to be happy. Their contact seems more raw and physical; after a long kiss she is lifting his head and bites him hardly just below his ear. He is groaning from pleasure and she is drinking from him...his blood! Oh my God. He is crying out even more and then she stops and glances at me really threatening; she is scary! I am shocked and I am back to my body. Before Kellan wakes up I stand and start searching his neck, just below his ears, for any marks but I do not see anything, so I sigh. He wakes up only to find me standing really close to him, just on top of his lap, so he pulls me closer to him to kiss me. I manage to pull back but as he is holding me there, on his knees, he tries to kiss me again…Is he ablaze because of the dream or does he actually want me?

"Please stop Kellan."

"Why? I thought this is what you wanted. You were all over me."

"No I wasn't. I was looking for something. Anyway I thought we said no more kissing."

"No, you said no more kissing. All I did was sighing…"

"I thought it was enough…"

"What? Kissing you?"

"No, you sigh for agreement."

"Oh, because you know, kissing you is never enough…"

"Come on Kellan…"

"Ok ok…I will be good!"

"As if…"

"Come on now. I promise. Do you want to go for a walk?"

"Fine"

"Fine"

"Let me go change."

"I can help you!"

"That wouldn’t be necessary but thanks…"

"I will be outside then."

We spend the evening walking around in the fields. Kellan is giving me strange looks all the afternoon; like being in awe about something. I do not pay attention. I concentrate on the signs I get from the earth under my feet and the air and nature around me and I am trying to hide all these feelings I have from Kellan. I am a bit worried, as it’s getting dark. Maybe D is somewhere around watching me. I am wondering if he would be annoyed with me spending time with Kellan. Well, I guess of course he would be; I would for sure be annoyed, if I knew he was kissing someone else now. I did kiss Kellan again. I didn’t mean to do it this time and I stopped it immediately but the fact is that it happened again. Last time D told he is in pain when somebody else touches me. Would he know about this kiss? And what was this dream he had about Alicia. How could I even be able to see in his dream? I guess this is another aspect of my new me, or maybe I am just imagined it. After a really long walk we decide to go to my dad’s pub and have a couple of drinks.

We enter the pub to find quite a few people there, which is bizarre, but from Kellan I learn that each Monday my dad has a 'happy hour'. In UK all pubs have days with 'happy hours', when the drinks are very cheap compared to normal. That is the reason for all these people drinking on a Monday night. We are ordering our drinks and go to our table to find it full, so we decide to sit on the bar. Better for me, my dad is there as well, so Kellan is restricting his words and actions. After a couple of hours I am heading back home to read my book and sleep.

I haven’t opened it since I left Aisha’s shop other day. She gave it to me. It was the one that looked intentionally put on the shelves. She told me I should read it and return it to her, once I am done. I open it and start reading only to realize it is a dairy. This must be really interesting. I scan a few pages and somewhere in the middle…

 

*****

July 15th, 1853

Dear diary,

I am back from school and I am quite exhausted. I have seen him again today and although I know he does not love me, he was very intimate with me. He tried to explain what is going on and told me that I should not be afraid. They are not evil. They just need to communicate with me. They were imprisoned for a long time. He was moving so quickly. He is not a man. He says he is a spirit but I know the truth. He is undead; frozen. My mother says that she heard that undeads killed that man couple of days ago at the port. The body had no blood left in him. But he is not bad. I love him. He kissed me again today. He approached me and seduced me and then he drunk from me, as before. I was not in pain though. I am in a little pain now as I really need him to come back and drink again…

Mary Anna

 

Oh my god! 1853? Is this thing real? Who is Mary Anna? Why did Aisha give this to me? I want to read more, so I turn the page.

 

*****

July 16th, 1853

Dear diary,

I have not gone out today as I was feeling sick. I have high fever. Unfortunately I cannot see him. I miss him so much! I hope tomorrow I will be feeling better.

Mary Anna

*****

July 17th, 1853

Dear diary,

Yesterday night something magnificent happened. I was feeling really sick and tired and I was sleeping and dreaming of him and then he was here; in my room. I was so scared; my mother and father were sleeping in the next room, but he told me that nobody would know. He undressed me and kissed me and started drinking from me again and I was feeling so much better. It felt so warm and right and then he bit his arm and put it in my mouth and I licked his blood, it tasted like wine, so delicious. I think he slept with me.

Today I woke up alone, I got dressed and already I am feeling much better. My mother says it must have been just a cold. I am going out later. I hope I will see him.

I am so happy…He must love me if he came to cure me!

More news later…

Mary Anna

 

Can it be that this girl, so many years ago met an immortal? Is this why Aisha gave it to me to read it? Was he really a vampire! He was drinking her blood. It seems like a romantic stupid fiction novel…It can’t be true. Only somewhere inside me I know it is. I am wondering if this man has nothing to do with my D. Νο, it can’t be; D is not a vampire. Is he? Lost in my thoughts I fall asleep.

 

*****

 

 

I wake up in the morning to find the book still in my hands. I close it and put it in my backpack. I am planning to visit the store again today to clarify the origin of it. I really want to read it from the start but I need to know if it is authentic first. I cannot go on speculating, I think I will go mad soon.

I get dressed and go down in the kitchen, where I can hear my dad tucking various groceries in the fridge and the kitchen cupboards. He must have just come back from the shop, so I help him out and I also turn on the coffee pot to prepare some coffee. I want to talk to him since yesterday but we had not been alone before.

''Hey dad, how are you today?''

''I am fine honey. How are you?''

''Ok I guess. I wanted to ask you something.''

''Shoot!''

"Well, what would you think if I changed my flights and extended my stay for a while? I do not have any obligations back home until I go to the Uni and I was thinking I could get a part time job in the city and spend some months with you, if you want me to stay of course. I do not want to be a burden." He smiles at me and looks really pleased.

"You may stay here for the rest of your life if you want! I could not be happier to have you…"

"Well I can stay until the summer is over and then we see…"

"And you do not need to work you know…"

"I know dad, but I had a part time job in Greece before last Christmas and I enjoy having my money. Plus I need something productive to do with my time while you are also gone. If I am at the pub all day, I will become an alcoholic!!!"

I am smiling at him and after a while he gets the joke! For a moment he looked really scared and worried and I can’t help but laughing with the fact that Greek jokes don’t sound equally funny in English! So we spend some more time cleaning around and putting everything in position. My dad's kitchen is excellent. It has huge cupboards of beautiful dark wood, so we don't have to squeeze things to fit as in my house back in Greece and all the appliances seem like they escaped from a house magazine. After we finish our job I use the job excuse to leave and go to town. I decide to skip breakfast, as I am quite anxious with both the things I am planning for today. I need to find Aisha and understand the origin of this diary and also buy a paper and find something to do with my free time.

After a while I am standing outside O' Malley's but I see no sign of life inside. I can’t help but worrying about Aisha and Eodan. I am hoping nothing bad happened to them. There is not much I can do by standing here wondering, so I decide to move to the second task of my list and revisit the shop later to check on them.

I head to the newsagent to buy a paper with job ads, but before I reach there, I see an announcement stuck on the screen of a music store just opposite the street, asking for an employee. Awesome luck! This is a good opportunity I think, so I enter the store to find the owner sitting behind the desk, reading a book. The shop is really small but it has shelves all around the walls, which holds thousands of cds and albums. The walls are painted a light green color and the shelves are black; the result is actually really good. The lighting is a bit faint as well but the owner seems an ok guy. He is not very tall, this is a change for an Irish guy, but he has the light brown colored hair and the blues eyes I see a lot around here. He is also quite pale. I would still win him in a competition but he wouldn’t lose by far! The music is some kind of British Rock and I welcome the sound. I like the environment in here. I get a good feeling and he is really polite when he speaks. He is introducing himself to me and explains that there is no specific schedule. He needs an employee for four or five hours per day but the timetable is flexible. It is fine with me anyway, as I have nothing to do all day, so once he tells me he is paying the basic salary I accept immediately. I will be starting tomorrow at twelve to spend some time with him, Mark, and get acquainted with the job. I am thanking him for giving me the opportunity and leave the music store. That was easy; too easy, I guess! In Greece I would have to try really hard for even such a job. On my way back I pass by O' Malley's again but the shop is still closed. What the heck is going on here?

I am back to the pub with part of my mission accomplished, but I am happy. I have decided to stay here longer, and I have a new job. Suddenly I am thinking about Kellan, wondering when he is supposed to go back to Edinburgh. Doesn’t he have a job and some classes to attend? I also need to call my mum and give her the news. I hope she will be fine with the change of plans. Tomorrow…I will do it first thing tomorrow morning. Besides, I need to speak with my dad about this family roots issue…So many things, so little time!

I have dinner with my dad and as tonight it is actually very quiet, I decide to go back home and unpack my stuff! I will be staying here for a while, so what is the point of having everything inside my suitcase? Also I need to ask my mum to send me, or even better bring me, some clothes and maybe stay for a weekend; that would be an excellent excuse for her. I had packed for only a few days and soon I will have to do my laundry. I hate laundry! On the other hand I love clean tidy closets, so I put on some Placebo music and I get down to business. I clean the old and really unused closet and I start hanging my tops and jeans inside. I use a drawer to put all my underwear and another one for my socks. I am a freak when it comes to separating and packing my stuff, so I spend quite some time doing that. I am really absorbed when I feel strange. Dubhghall is somewhere close to me. I turn around to see him standing outside the window. Not flying or floating, just standing there motionless with his feet nowhere near the ground…how the hell is he doing that? He makes a head movement for me to open the window and let him in. He is not happy today; not even close! He is annoyed and angry and edgy, so I don’t make any move to hold him or kiss him. I can understand him though, so I start making amends when he interrupts me only to say…

"I am not annoyed because you let Kellan kiss you, or because you slept in his arms, or because you spend time with him. I see how strong your connection is and I felt you did not want the kiss and you stopped it." I did all these but they sound much worse now that he is listing them, but if he is not angry about any of these, then what? I stay there speechless waiting for him to explain.

"I am really irritated because you don’t seem to realize that all this is not a game. This is your life. And you are my life. You allow yourself to be vulnerable and you put other people in danger. You don’t focus on what is important. And now she knows you can feel his emotions and walk his dreams."

"Who did I put in danger? You?"

"I am more dangerous than any other creature I know of…you cannot harm me. But if they know that she talked to you, they can really harm the lady."

"Aisha?"

"Yes, her."

"Who are they?"

"How much did she tell you?"

"I don't know. Much I guess…"

"Then you must have an idea about who I am taking about!" He is sarcastic and sharp. He has never spoken to me like that before. Ι am embarrassed now and I feel tears filling my eyes but I swallow hard and keep them restrained. I am not going to start crying as a little baby here. And suddenly I am dogged. I will not tolerate this attitude. He told me to go find the lady. He told me to open up to my senses and embrace the stupid crap that is going on around me and I am sure he can feel how mad and frustrated I am right now…

"I am sorry. I did not mean to put her in danger."

"I know that." I can feel he is softening but I am still annoyed.

"Who is she that knows I can feel things?"

"What did you see in Kellan's dream? I felt your shock and fear but I could not see anything further."

"Nothing. Nobody…"

"Titania, this is not the time for you to hide things from me…or think you protect Kellan."

"I did not see anything and Kellan does not need my protection."

"Fine!"

"Fine…" He turns suddenly his head as if he heard something he does not like.

"I really need to go know… Be careful!" But before I can say no, please don’t go, I am sorry for everything, I don’t want to hide things from you, he is out of the window and lost in the night…How does he do that? I hear the doorbell ringing really intensively. Who the hell is it now? I go downstairs only to find Kellan standing there with his finger stuck on the doorbell. I open the door and I feel a range of ugly feelings. He is extremely heated about something I cannot understand yet.

"I heard you the first time you know."

"You are staying here longer?"

"Hello Kellan. I see the news travel really fast… who told you?"

"Does it matter? And you got a job?"

"What the hell Kellan? You are following me now?"

"When did you plan to tell me? We spent the whole day together yesterday and you said nothing!"

"First of all, I don’t see why I should have…I do not need to tell you everything. Secondly, I would tell you tomorrow… I just made up my mind today. And I got this part time job only today. How the hell do you even know?"

"Alicia saw you…"

"What?"

"She just saw you in town and found out by Mark that you will be working for him."

"And she did not lose any time telling you…"

"She also told me you met someone!"

"What?"

"She said you met this guy and that he is the reason you are not going back to Greece."

"Where did she hear that?"

My mind is working like crazy here. What is going on…How does Alicia know all these? Is she the one D was referring to before? Does she also know what is going on with me? Did I really see her in the dream drinking Kellan’s blood? Could she also be of a different nature? Is there anybody who could really answer all my questions? Kellan seems puzzled.

"I do not know."

"And you believed her?"

"Why would she lie to me Tita?"

"Well, to get in your pants for starters; I told you what she said to me. I see how she looks at you. She wants you Kellan."

"She is not that bad. She would not hurt me on purpose by telling me lies."

"And I would?"

"Ii don't know"

"So you do believe her…"

"Well, have you met someone?"

"No!" I know I am lying but I really don't want to hurt him. I will tell him everything in time. In the end I am not even aware of the full picture here; I don't want to involve Kellan in that. Stupid Alicia!

"Is this the truth?"

"Yes Kellan. It is the truth…"

"And why are you staying in Ireland?"

"Because I do not have anything to do in Greece. I have missed my dad and I could be closer to Edinburgh and visit you to arrange things for September." Again, not true, but this seems to calm him down a bit. He is hiding a smile now but he still has his doubts. He is easy to manipulate but not that easy I guess.

"You really did not meet anyone?"

"Why is this so hard to believe?"

"Because yesterday you were really unenthusiastic when I tried to kiss you. I know what you said, but all previous times it felt like you enjoyed it too."

"I did. I do."

"So kiss me again…"

"What kind of proof would that be?"

"The kind that I need…"

"I am not going to kiss you to confirm what I am saying. I believe we are friends for so long that you should know you can trust me and…" Before I finish he grabs me and kisses me, but this time his kiss is not soft, or gentle, it is angry and possessive and hard and a bit painful. It is like he is imposing himself on me and I really don’t like that; I am also sure that D is somewhere outside the house getting all these feelings from me. I need to act upon it fast, if I do not want him to break the door and punch Kellan or whatever... I know he wouldn’t hurt me but I am still not sure how dangerous he can be for Kellan…what did he say about his past, he was lethal, he has taken lives! So I try to relax in my head. Don’t think how much I want to punch Kellan on the face now, only think of happy thoughts. And I relax my lips also, I let him kiss me and then he loses his grab as well. I set my self free and I slap him…really hard!

"Outs! What the f**k Tita?"

"Don’t swear at me!"

"Why did you slap me, and when did you become so strong? It really hurt!!!"

"That’s for not listening to me. No means no Kellan…" He turns his back at me and opens the door, but before he is gone, he dares tell me that I am not fair with him. I am not fair! Well hell I am fair. Fair does not mean his way. Now I am even angrier if this can ever be. I slap the door and go to my room; I turn the music really loud and close the lights. Listening to Placebo, I get in my bed… I hear something or someone from outside. Enough is enough. I don’t want to see either of them again tonight. I don't know how much time passes but I finally fall asleep.

There is noise. I see around me and I am in a place I have not been before. A really old building; not a building, a cabin, in the middle of an endless field and I stand just outside listening to voices. I peep from the window to see that there are people inside. I watch closer and I understand they are not people. Creatures of various figures are inside. Some of them making out, I see a very beautiful girl walking towards a guy and when he smiles I see he has fangs, but she is not worried. She is kissing him now and then he bites her neck and sucks and she is very close to ecstasy and behind them I see two shorter figures, like midgets or gnomes who speak with each other having their back to me, they have tails. Somewhere in the back I see Alicia doing really nasty things with someone. I cannot see who he is but I am sure he is Kellan. He turns his head and does not look happy but his eyes are hazy and he is moaning now. And then the door opens and someone is out there calling my name.

 

Chapter VII - The story back

 

 

I am awake!

I am covered with sweat and my hair sticks on my face. What was that dream? It was exciting and electrifying and yet honestly scary. I look at my watch and it’s only ten in the morning. Good, I have to get ready to go to work for the first day, but before this I need to pass by O' Malley's and check out Aisha and Eodan. I need to ask her about the diary. I have not forgotten it but with everything that happened yesterday I did not feel like reading. Once I am up, I take off my clothes and get in the shower. I need to get rid of all the sweat and wash my hair, which is not my favorite deed, it is difficult to wash and untangle all this curly mess. I open the water and the feel on my skin is completely different than before. Every day I recognize something new on me. I wonder when this will stop. How much more will I discover? The water is caressing my body; it feels like every pore I have uses the water to refresh me. It’s very nice in reality. I can’t help but thinking that until now things is not that bad. When will all hell break loose? I was never a positive thinker so I am sure there is something wrong with all this.

I get in my favorite jeans, my black converse and a really nice black top I bought just before coming to Ireland. I want to look nice for my first day at work. First impression is everything. I go downstairs to find my dad having coffee and breakfast. As I still have a few minutes to sit with him, I grab a cup and eat a cereal bar really quickly. I ask him what time is he leaving for the pub today. It’s a Wednesday, so he does not open up till after six, so we plan to have late lunch together today and he promises to cook something nice to celebrate my first day at work. Dad is a really good cook; well he has been living alone for many years now, so I guess he had plenty of practice.

I put on my army jacket, take my backpack and I am off. When I turn the corner for O' Malley's I see the light is on and someone is in there. Instantly I feel a bit relaxed. Nothing bad could have happened, or the shop would not be open. I go inside to find Eodan at the cashier looking at me a bit reluctant. I will be extra polite!

"Hello, would you please tell me where I could find Ms. Aisha?"

"Aisha is at the back." His eyes are pleading; I want to appease him so I just smile and say…"

"I want to ask her a really quick question about a book. Then I am off, as I need to go to work." He doesn’t speak so I walk to the back to find Aisha rearranging some books. She does not turn her head.

"I knew you would come back my child. Have you read it already?"

"I read a couple of pages. Is it authentic? Who is Mary Anna?"

"Marry Anna was just another girl. She is not important. But one of them fell in love with her. Read the book. It will help you solve many questions."

"Do you know Ali..." Before I finish the sentence she stops me.

"We do not speak of their names or they are attracted to us. And they can hear us you know. This is not the time or the place for us to talk more. Don’t you have a place to be?"

"Yes, I started a part time job."

"Good for you…So you are staying!"

"Is this good?"

"We shall see my child. We shall see! Be careful now…"

I hate it when people tell me to be careful, without identifying any possible danger. Obviously I am not going to spend the rest of my life hiding or being afraid. I hate it, I hate it. My mood has just changed to grumpy. I walk to the music store to find Mark at the same position as yesterday but once I enter he gets up to offer me some coffee. We chit chat for a while and he asks me about my life in general. I learn that he has a baby girl named Mia and he is married for almost three years now. He does not look old at all. Maybe even in his early twenties. How can he have a child already? I know it’s not polite to ask. In the end my father would look equally young when he had me. After a while he starts showing me around. The hours pass really quickly as there are many things I need to learn. Where different types of bands are, how to handle the cash register, what we do in the morning, in case I need to open, or in the evening, in case I need to close up, and before I know it, it is already four fifteen.

"This is enough for today Tita. You learn fast. That is good!"

"Thank you. I really like it here. And you play awesome music."

"I am glad you like it. My previous employee really hated it. I guess this is one reason he left! Well, I see you tomorrow around ten then; is it ok for you?"

"Excellent. Goodbye."

"Bye"

I am heading home thinking Mark seems like a really good guy and I guess he would not gossip with Alicia about me. So she must have asked him directly. I need to find out their connection. As I am thinking of all this, I feel the first drops of the forthcoming heavy rain on my face. I love rain. I do not mind getting wet and I never carry an umbrella, so instead of running, as normal people would do; I walk slowly and embrace the rain drops on my face and my skin. Rain is so refreshing and purifying. I almost forget all my troubles.

Even before I enter the house I can smell the food and I am sure it will be delicious. It must be something with beef and cream; I go in to find the table all set and my dad waiting in the living room. I am drooling on the floor now so I take off my shoes and my coat and get a towel for my hair.

"How was your day?"

"Great really. Even the rain was beautiful."

"I thought you would enjoy that. Go get dry and get ready to eat, I am starving, and we can talk on the table."

I run up the stairs to change my clothes and as I enter my room I find a very beautiful flower on my pillow. It is a big purple orchid, a Magairlín gaelach as my father would say, not actually cut by eradicated. I know this name because this is my favorite flower here in Ireland. It is the only name I could ever remember.

"Dad, did Kellan pass by before?"

"No sweetie. Why?"

"Oh nothing!"

"So I guess it must be D’s."

Why eradicated though? And then I know the answer. I need to put it in the ground again. Does this mean he knows my connection with flora and fay and earth? I find myself smiling now and I realize I have missed him. I haven’t seen him, or kissed him for what it matters, for a couple of days. Yesterday does not count. I will erase that moment for any future reference. I wrap the flower in the towel I hold and run down the stairs to leave it outside the front door at the porch. It is better to be in the fresh air at least. Later, I will re-plant it.

I go inside, wash up and sit on the table. My dad is already serving our plates. The food is delicious and he starts small talk about the job and all. He asks me how come I decided to stay, not that he is not thrilled to have me, and things like that. As I am wondering how I can initiate the discussion I want, he starts asking me various things and I realize that he also has a hidden agenda.

"Sweetie, have you called your mum to tell her?"

"No, not yet. I will do it later today though…"

"What do you think your mum would say if I give her a call?"

I am trying to recollect the last time they spoke on the phone but I can’t; I always thought my dad hated this device. I am not thrilled with the phone either, I rarely use it…especially my mobile, but I believed that my dad never used it. So this makes his proposal even more significant!

"I think she would be very happy…"

"So… what would you say?"

"Dad, are you truly worried for me or are you asking me for permission? Cause if you do, I will grand you permission if you tell me what happened!"

"Tita…"

"Dad, I am eighteen and I know that something happened with you two…I also know you love her and she loves you and despite the fact that you live apart, it doesn’t seem to work well for neither of you when you are not together. You are much happier together, so please respect my intelligence and tell me what happened…not the disgusting details though…"

"Tita…"

"I am teasing you… sorry! Now tell me…"

"Do you really think she loves me?" I roll my eyes, thinking all men are the same…clueless!

"Of course she does dad. I can’t believe you are so ignorant of such an obvious fact!"

"I do love her you know."

"I know."

"You do?"

"Of course I do. I always knew it…go on!"

"Well it was nice seeing her again this weekend, and under a happy occasion…I mean until now we only met for a few hours usually in a lot of tense…"

"Why did you break up in the first place…mum never talks about that."

"Tita, you won’t understand…it was very difficult for your mum when you were born."

"But why?"

"There are many things you need to know…" Maybe this is it. I need to start this discussion now.

"I have time! I wanted to ask you about our past anyhow."

"Well, for starters, she knew you had something different and she wanted to take you away from here…here you were always very lost…like having nightmares, drawing ugly pictures, waking up in the night screaming…seeing things!"

"I do not remember any of this."

"You were young…When we decided to break up you were not even five and then for the first couple of years I couldn’t see you. Your mum did not want you to visit and I did not want to be under the same roof with her new husband. I tried making a new family again but that did not work either, as you already know…and one day your mum said that since you were getting better, the nightmares had stop and everything, she would bring you here for a visit…You were already nine; I had not seen you for five years, but that day, when I picked you both from the airport, I knew you were still my favorite. And I fell for Em all over again…she was still so beautiful. I broke up with Molly and she broke up with… you know who, and after only nine years, I made my move!!!" He is laughing now and I am speechless… I did not know any of these. My mum never really talks of the past or my dad or Galway…instead she was always really restless when she was leaving me here for a couple of weeks during holidays with my dad.

"Will you please tell me more…about then I mean. When I was born…"

"Ok fine, but you promise to let me finish before you jump on me and also tell me what you really think. You don’t get to disappear on me… I won’t lose you over this!"

"Why would you lose me? I am here, aren’t I?"

"Well, let’s see… When I first met your mother I was studying in London. She was my best mate’s friend from class and we met at a party. I was twenty one and she had just arrived that year in the University, so she was nineteen or something. I saw her in that room that night and she was so beautiful I could not take my eyes off her for the rest of the night!"

"She was wearing my dress."

"Yes, but it was not the dress that appealed to me…your mother has a different air around her, maybe being from Greece I don’t know, she was nothing like the girls I had seen before. Fortunately, she liked tall men with strange accents and we immediately fell head over heels for each other. We were spending every day together, the only few hours we were apart was in classes and I could not stop thinking about her…and then I proposed that she came to meet my parents. She was enthusiastic about the idea and we made the trip…She loved Galway and the sympathy with my folks was instant and deep. You do not remember your grandparents, as they died when you were almost six but they were great people and your mum liked them a lot."

"I do remember grand mum I think."

"You do?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Well, during that trip she got pregnant; of course there was no second thought, I made the proposal right away and she accepted…We were so happy…After nine months you came in this world and when we looked at you for the first time, we knew you were special… What you do not know, and your mum didn’t know either till then, is that my great ancestors were one of the most important families in Connacht, the area were Galway belonged… As my great grandmother used to recite in stories for me, we had immortal blood in us. I thought all that to be stupid folklore fantasies and nothing more; it did not provide me with any 'gifts' or 'problems' until then but when I saw you, I knew I had to tell everything to your mum. I did not know if any of these was true but you looked so extraordinary that I could not keep the secret, especially from you mum…what if it was true? So we came back here to live in this house my parents had given us as a wedding gift and then her nightmares started. At the beginning she was seeing strange dark figures reaching out to steal you from us and ghosts flying over your bed and you kept waking up crying in the middle of the night and we did not know what to do… On one hand it was so ridiculous to believe all that but on the other hand you were growing up to be more lost and strange every day. You started talking really early and sometimes your mum was telling me you were describing to her creatures and places that you could never have seen. You spoke Greek, English and Irish all together and I really did not understand anything and neither did your mum but it was scary…and the need to act upon it was imperative. I don’t need to tell you that all this was tearing us apart. Your mum was always very sad and scared and I was blaming myself for everything." He stops talking and looks at me; he is waiting for a reaction but I cannot move, I cannot eat, I keep staring at him, giving me all this information about my childhood and it is nothing I could ever have imagined; I am so rapt by his story, so I just wave my head and he goes on…

"We took you to see child therapists, who claimed there was nothing wrong with you, you just had a flourishing imagination, but your mum could not rest…She was watching you many times sitting on the ground talking to yourself and she kept crying…she was crying all the time. I could not see her like that anymore. It really destroyed her. And then one day, an old lady drifter was passing by the street and when she saw you and your mum sitting there on the porch she came closer to talk to her…She said:

"I feel your despair and your pain, but you should know she is meant to live in-between worlds…"

Your mother did not know what to say and so she replied with the only thing that mattered to her…

"I don’t want to lose her! What can I do?"

"Take her away and the nightmares will go…but only till she is a woman…then it’s her path to choose if she will walk it…"

So she decided to take you back to her home in Greece and I could not do anything. To tell you the truth I did not want to do anything. I also thought that was best for both of you, and me missing you was not a good enough reason to keep you here. And like that she left…I never believed for one moment she did not love me but she loved you more. And she tried to keep you as protected as she could…"

I sigh, thinking that the lady drifter must have been Aisha.

"I know it all sound really crazy; you must think I am losing it but…"

"No, actually I think it makes sense…"

"You do? I am sorry to tell you all this now but your mum and I thought you should know and since you decided to stay here for more than a couple of weeks, I thought you really needed to hear it from me."

"Thank you dad for that. Indeed I needed to know that."

"Why? Have you noticed something strange in you lately?"

"Like what?"

"I don’t know; it’s just… you look different to us and we were wondering."

"No dad, nothing is different, don’t worry!" Maybe I am missing my chance to speak with him but I cannot do that to him. He is already too worried. I don't want to add on that.

"Honey, I know all this is not easy to digest but I am here for you always. Is there something else you need to ask?"

"No daddy. Not for now…"

"Ok then…I need to be going to the pub sweetie. It’s already six. Will I see you tonight?"

"Fingers crossed!"

"I love you. Make the call and let your mum know you are staying. Better not to tell her that I told you all this yet; too much information for one evening."

I sigh again. He gives me a kiss and he is gone. I guess this means I will also do the dishes…puff!

 

*****

 

 

I finish the dishes and it’s already seven in the evening, so I decide to get my laptop, surf the internet for a while and check my emails. It’s the first time I do that since I arrived in Ireland. I have four new emails from my University informing me about the class schedule, about the campus and the living opportunities, as well as the city of Edinburgh. They also have sent me some forms I need to fill in and send back with my personal details. I have an email from my mum telling me that everything was fine with her flight and that I should call her whenever I have some time. I have a lot of junk emails from addresses I do not identify and I start throwing them away. Once I finish, I decide to search the net for the Samhain festival and I get too many sites back. In various eras and religions the Samhain festival meant different things but it is nowadays connected with the Halloween celebrated in many countries or the Night of the dead celebrated in Spain. I also search the Celtic myths and Gaelic folklore. I don’t really enjoy reading on the screen but what can you do? It is indeed the fastest way to get your hands on information. One search leads to another and I start from basic history of the country to move backwards in time to the people of Danu, the battles with the previous wave of inhabitants of Ireland, the four cities, the kings and families that led mortals and immortals. I can’t stop thinking that there might be my ancestors in these lines and stories. Can this be the story my great grandmother used to tell to my dad? There are too many names, too many kings and queens, and it gets so confusing, I decide to close the laptop and take a nap. In my sleep I revisit a story…a familiar story! I see my grandmothers’ face, only I do not really remember her. I was six when she died but I am sure it is her. She is telling me that I am special, don’t all grandmothers say that? That my blood is different, strong and royal; I should lead an army; the army that will rise from the underground. An army full of immortals…I am their Queen. My family used to be noble.

"I have been talking to them you know and they expect you. You will be their dreadful Queen and the dark angel will follow you till your paths are one!"

Did she say the dark angel? Could she mean Dubhghall? He is not an angel though! He can’t be. Angels do not take lives and harm people as he said. Maybe this is what she wanted her to believe. How did she die? I am thinking now that I actually don’t know much about my grandparents. My mum's parents had died in an accident so neither my dad nor my mum speaks of them. I need to ask my dad about it.

When I wake up it’s already half eight and as I am planning to go out early today, I turn on my music and get in the shower. Despite all these things happening in my life at the moment, this house still feels like a shelter to me and in my shelter I enjoy sleeping and listening to music…really loudly! I get dressed and after an hour I am out. I have decided that I am not going directly to the pub tonight. I want to spend some time in the fields. As I walk deeper in the countryside, I start feeling really nice. As I look around, I realize that I can see very well even though it is getting really dark. I had not noticed that before. In fact I can see better in the dark than in the light nowadays. I remember how irritated my eyes were when I left Aisha’s dark room the other day. I can also hear everything around me really clearly. I hear the whisper of the trees and the song of the air and the mumbling of…who really? I don’t see anyone else but I guess it can be wind transferring voices of people from really far away. I can scent different aromas and identify various flowers and plants…now I can appreciate all these lessons my dad desperately wanted to give me about nature… By the way I need to plant this flower if I want it to live. I promise myself to do it tomorrow morning, before I go to work. All my senses have grown really strong, plus I can feel people’s feelings if I want and understand more or less what they are thinking.

I keep walking and suddenly I see a fainting light coming from under a tree very far away. I approach really slowly and carefully keeping a safe distance. I cannot see anything but I sense it is Kellan standing there speaking to something…someone. I cannot understand the form of the creature in the light, as I am keeping my distance and I hear only whispering. Suddenly there is a sense of urgency in Kellan’s mind and the light goes out. Kellan is walking back towards me and although I cannot she his face, I am sure he is not smiling; his thoughts are dim and threatening. I try to hide and wish I could become one with the ground. I lay down with my back on the ground and suddenly I feel the earth moving around me. It is growing rapidly and the grass is covering me. Wow! This is awesome. I am inside the ground but I don’t feel claustrophobic or suffocating. I feel good, wonderful actually. I am completely hidden all wrapped up with grassland and Kellan keeps walking, passing by me; I am invisible to the human eye. When I feel no one around and I know he is gone I ask earth to free me and thank her for her help. It was indeed remarkable. I stand up thinking I must be full of dirt but I look down my clothes and they are as clean as new; again, thank you earth for that. I start walking towards the tree but when I reach it I do not see anything. I feel something strange in the air though. I am at uneasy and this must mean that whatever was here was really not on the good side! I turn around to see Dubhghall standing a bit far behind me.

Once I smile and he sees acceptance he moves instantly to stand in front of me; really close to my body. The proximity raises my heart beat and I start thinking of really nasty things. He smiles. I am sure I am blushing but it is dark so I don’t really mind.

"Hello my love. You are really beautiful tonight." I look at my clothes and I am thinking he can’t see clearly, as I am only in black tights and a black top. I am thinking he is indeed making a compliment to me but he goes on…

"You are very different from five days ago. I have been watching you all your life and you were always beautiful and special but since you turned into a woman and completed the change, you are gorgeous…like a dream! Every day you become even more attractive!"

"Well I am not that special…"

"My lady… you have hair of the color of the sunset and eyes of the color of the fields, your lips are full and have a scarlet red as blood and your body is curvy and healthy and fertile as earth itself. What is not special about you?"

"D, please…"

"Titania look…I don’t know how it works with your kind. I mean when and how you need to identify your nature and powers and I assumed wrong to believe that you could comprehend everything at once…I am sorry about that, and I am sorry about getting mad at you yesterday. The truth is that I have been walking this world for many years now, looking for you, and eighteen years back I felt your birth in the world of humans... I regained hope of finding you… I am here for you. I am here to be your follower, your partner, your supporter in this journey you start…and believe me it is not a simple one. There are many things you need to learn and enemies to worry about…but you are not alone! Here you are home…nature is your shelter and everything around us can feed you and strengthen you and provide you with all the help you may need… When you are ready you need to call out for them?"

"Them? Who them?''

"You will see when the time comes. I do not want to spoil the surprise."

"I hate surprises."

"No you don’t! Anyhow, deep inside you, I am sure, you know! Things were easier in the past, when mortals and immortals were closer…Now you really need to invite them to you…"

"When was this past?"

"Long before your Christ walked the earth. Immortals were always here."

"So you are an immortal?"

"Yes.

Were you born?"

"Yes."

"When?"

"Time is not the same for me and you my love. I would say quite a few centuries ago…"

"What? God you are old!" He is smiling now and I love this smile. He does not look older that twenty or something. I can’t keep wondering if I can look as good as him after a few thousand years.

"So you cannot die?"

"Of course I can. I am trying hard not to though."

"Where were you all these years?"

"I have been everywhere. All around the world. For many centuries I was sleeping underground the earth. I was waiting for a reason to be awakened, and then you came to the world of mortals but you were not one of them and I knew you were the one I needed to find, even before I was awake."

"You were born in Ireland?"

"No I arrived on the island when Danu did. I came from The Isle of Man. I followed the Goddess. She had promised me that I would find my lady here. I fought hard for her for ages. But after many battles we were few left and we decided to go underground where we could be in touch with Mother Nature and leave the upper world to mortals. We do walk this world from time to time without restriction though." I am shocked to hear the name of the goddess. So indeed it is these stories I remember.

"When you say we, who do you mean?"

"Immortals of any kind!"

"How many kinds are there?"

"Many…"

"Are vampires one of these kinds?"

"Yes indeed, a lower kind."

"What do you mean?"

"Vampires were created, by immortals or Gods that gone bad. It does not mean they are all evil but they are not the same with you for example."

"What am I?"

"You are a fairy!"

"What?"

"You are a Fairy Queen! Actually you are THE Fairy Queen, as at the moment there is no other queen walking the earth!"

"What? Come again!"

"The last Queen of the fairies was killed a few centuries ago, and that is the reason why your change means that much."

"What?" No way, no way. This is fairy tales, bullshit. Somebody is making fun of me. No way!!!

"My love, I guess you would know by now…"

"You think!!! Well I don't…Nobody told me that!"

"Who did you expect to tell you?"

"I do not know Aisha…you!"

"This is something that we identify alone. Don’t you feel the nature; don’t you hear it whispering to you, calling you? Hadn’t you noticed how you are? Was I the only person telling you that you shine?"

"What do you mean?"

"There is an aura around you. Different than any other I have ever seen; luminous and really gracious. What did you expect after everything the old lady and your father told you? And after all that I have explained?"

"I don’t know. Ok, I got that I am different and immortal but a queen? How can I be a Queen? Hey, how did you know about my dad?"

"I am always connected to you; I need to identify any possible threat for you. Sorry for that. As for your first question, I really don’t have the answer to that. Maybe the old lady knows."

"She told me that I am special because I was born on the Beltane. The Goddess gave me special affinities and I have immortal blood. So the Goddess could have chosen anyone else born on May 1st I guess."

"I really don’t know. Maybe your people will know."

"People? What people?"

"Your followers…"

"I don’t have followers…"

"Of course you do and they depend on you! They have been waiting for years as well. Immortals of any kind; elves, fairies, leprechauns…all sprites. You should present yourself to them. You are their Queen and they need you…as much as you need them."

"I need only you…"

"I am here for you…from always and for always…" He starts kissing me; softly and kindly. I need this kiss. I need his touch. There were so many revelations today that I need him to reassure me he is really here. He is for real. That I am not losing it, as my mother was always afraid that would happen. I wrap my arms around him and I start seeing images. I can read his thoughts. That is the first time I am able to do that. And I see me through his eyes; I am amazed. I can understand now, why he believes I am the one he says I am. I am tall and fearless, with my hair really long and graceful, glowing as it falls down all around my body. I am wearing strange clothes, like ancient ones; a top wrapped around my breasts and a small leather skirt. My body is really fit and strong, my legs have muscles and I see a six pack where my flabby belly is at the moment. My face is also beautiful and serious. My lips are really full and my eyes are gleaming, as I am focused on something. This is the vision he had for me all these years. Since the first day his Goddess promised him, he will find me; all the years that he was left underground sleeping, this is the picture that accompanied him. I feel like I am deceiving him. He was waiting a really beautiful and fearless partner, a leader, and here I stand in front of him, only a girl; nothing close to what he had in mind. He intensifies his contact now. I can sense his body touching mine everywhere as we are almost glued to each other. I want more but I cannot stop thinking that I am not that woman; that queen!

"You are much more that I had ever expected. When my Goddess revealed your image to me for the first time I thought I was really lucky that I would have you as my partner."

"Aren’t you disappointed now?"

"My love, since the first time I saw you I expected you would turn into a really beautiful woman but the day you changed I could not believe my fortune. You are the one I want. Not the woman from the vision. You and only you."

He kisses me again on my lips and my cheeks and he hugs me really tight. I want to stay with him for the whole night talking but especially tonight I cannot have my dad worried that I am lost or something.

"Will you walk me to the pub?"

"Of course my lady."

"I have missed you very much. When will I see you again?"

"When would you like?"

"I would like you not to go but I guess this cannot happen..."

"Not yet at least!"

"Then tomorrow night. I can arrange it so that I don’t go to the pub and we spend the evening together. Will you come to the house?"

"I prefer to meet outside. You are always happier when you are close to earth."

"Ok, I will wait for you at the kiosk. Is that ok?"

"I will be there."

"And Dubhghall, thank you very much for the flower…"

"Which flower?"

"…the one on my bed!"

"I did not leave any flower on your bed!"

"Oh, ok..."

"Good night my love." That was really strange. Who left the flower then?

I enter the pub to find my dad sitting with some of his friends. It is a good excuse for me to skip dinner and just go home. I am not that hungry anyway and I prefer to go sleep. The time is way past ten; this way I can do some reading before I sleep.

 

*****

 

 

Resting nicely in my bed now, I decide to start the diary from the beginning.

 

February 5th, 1853

Dear diary,

You were a present for my seventieth birthday. I already love you and I will share all my secrets with you. We have arrived at this new land just a few weeks ago and although my mum and dad claim that it will be better in the future, I really don’t see it. In the school we are too many. I really don’t understand the language very well and I have no friends yet. At least I have you. I hope to have better news tomorrow…

Mary Anna

*****

February 8th, 1853

Dear diary,

Things are the same. Teachers are very bad and people are still getting sick. Everybody says this is because of all of us coming to the island. There were too many people died a couple of years ago and many of the left ones moved to this new land, America. People are reluctant to accept newcomers. Especially know that an illness is spreading. I am telling them that none of my family is sick but they still avoid me. I am so sad and lonely.

Mary Anna

*****

February 20th, 1853

Dear diary,

I am sorry I have not written for so long but I had nothing special to tell you. Yesterday things improved a bit. I got a really good grade in Algebra and then this girl Elisa spoke to me. She told me she lives on the island for many years now and asked me if I wanted to become friends with her. We spent the last two hours on the same desk and I learnt many things about her life. She told me that she is going to the woods for walks some times and asked me to join her. I will definitely be going!

Finally, a friend…

Mary Anna

All this is nice I am thinking but what does it have to do with me? I skip pages to read forward…

 

June 21st, 1853

Dear diary,

Today I saw him again. He is so handsome; a gentleman. He opened the door of the grocery store for me, I had gone for some milk, and he said "My Lady, please go first", Oh my god his voice, his accent, he called me a lady! Oh my God! I love him. I loved him since the first day I saw him. When will I see him again? I need to go in the woods again alone as he does not appear when Elisa is around. He must really dislike her.

Sweet diary I kiss you good night. I am so happy!

Mary Anna

*****

June 29th, 1853

Dear diary,

After school I finally managed to avoid my mum and Elisa and I went in the woods; there he was… sitting on a stem at the clearing where we first met. He was so gorgeous. I approached him and this time he asked me for my name. I replied and he said it was beautiful. He said I am beautiful. I asked him why he only appears when I am alone and he told me that no one else needs to know what we do. And then I asked him what is it that we do anyway? Just in a flash he was standing in front of me, holding me in his arms and dear diary guess what he said!!!

"We like each other, don’t we?"

I felt I would faint but he was holding me really tight and then he bent and he kissed me. It was my first kiss; so soft and beautiful. Oh I wanted him to kiss me again but he said: "Not now my lady. We will meet again soon!"

I am looking forward to meeting him…My father will not like this.

Mary Anna

*****

July 2nd, 1853

Dear diary,

It had been two days without seeing him and today after school, as I was walking home alone, I felt somebody pulling me in a dark alley. I was really scared at first but before I could scream he put his lips on mine. Today he was rougher and although I felt a bit embarrassed I really liked it. He was kissing me with his tongue and massaging my breasts and touching my back everywhere and then he lifted my skirt and touched me down there. I was ashamed and stimulated at the same time. As I was really close to scream out of pleasure he bit me really hard on my neck and I felt him sucking my blood. Is this normal? I felt like I exploded inside. It was so wonderful. Am I still a virgin. My father will kill me if he finds out. After a few seconds he took his teeth out of my neck and started licking me really tenderly and kissing me again. He told me he will wait for me again tomorrow. Oh! I so want him to do that again.

Mary Anna

*****

July 3rd, 1853

Dear diary,

Today some people at school were talking about a guy who was killed very close to where we met yesterday, so today I did not go back from the same road and I did not see him. He told me I cannot speak to anyone about him or us. What is he?

Mary Anna

*****

July 5th, 1853

Dear diary,

He was waiting for me at the same alley as last time and although I was with Elisa he called me and I went to him. I don’t know if Elisa saw him but she turned around and left immediately. He asked me where I was yesterday and I told him about the dead man. About what I heard, that something had drunk all his blood. He told me that there are creatures that do that and not all of them are evil. I know he could have hurt me if he wanted to but still I was not afraid of him. I told him I loved him and he said he is not capable of such love. He tried to kiss me but I ran because I did not want him to see me crying…I am so sad. What is he really? Who is he? Will I ever see him again?

Mary Anna

*****

July 9th, 1853

Dear diary,

Today I decided to go in the woods and find him. I had missed him and wanted him really bad. I wanted to kiss him. I don’t care if he is different. He is all I can think about. I found him at the same place as before and once he saw me he said he knew I was going to find him. He asked me to stop talking and started kissing me again. He put me tenderly on the ground and then lay on top of me. I could feel his body weight on mine. He was kissing me really ferocious and passionately but I didn’t mind. I liked it…he lifted my skirt again and kissing my breasts he got inside me. It was my first time but it didn’t hurt, as Elisa was saying it would. It felt incredible. He was moving rhythmically in and out of my body and I did not want him to stop. He was licking my breasts, my ears, my neck and then he bit me again, this time just over my left breast and it felt magical. He was drinking and I was pushing his head closer so that he wouldn’t stop. And then I felt this beautiful warm explosion inside and he stopped drinking and just licked my wound. He gave me another kiss and just like that vanished, leaving me there lying on the round. Oh dear god I am so sorry to admit that but it was so great. I want him again and again. I don’t care if he does not love me. I know it is a sin.

Mary Anna

I really cannot stop reading now…

July 11th, 1853

Dear diary,

My mother was saying before that some people in the market were talking about seeing the undead and that they look really evil. She said we should be really careful as evil sprites have arisen from the earth and we are vulnerable. I told her that maybe not all of them are bad and she told me to keep my mouth shut and return straight home after school every day. If only she knew. I guess she would really kill me herself!

Mary Anna

*****

July 15th, 1853

Dear diary,

I am back from school and I am quite exhausted. I have seen him again today and although I know he does not love me, he was very intimate with me. He tried to explain what is going on and told me that I should not be afraid. They are not evil. They just need to communicate with me. They were imprisoned for a long time. He was moving so quickly. He is not a man.

He says he is a spirit but I know the truth. He is undead; frozen. My mother says that she heard that the undead killed that man couple of days ago at the port. The body had no blood left in him. But he is not bad. I love him. He kissed me again today, only to approach me and seduce me and then he drunk from me as before. I was not in pain though. I am in a little pain now as I really need him to come back and drink again…

Mary Anna

 

This is the one page I had read by luck that first day. Oh, my God! It is true. This is the diary of a mortal girl that had met an immortal. Was he really a vampire? Most probably, as he was drinking her blood! I am really shaken and also excited at the same time. All these seem completely unreal. I can’t believe I am reading such books, I can’t believe I am meeting such people. I close the diary to get some sleep. It is almost two in the morning. So much for a good night sleep; I am really tired.

I wake up, get dressed, go to work, come back and go to sleep again.

 

Chapter VIII - The first meeting

 

 

I open my eyes and I know it’s already early evening. I look at my watch to see it is five thirty indeed. I am feeling much better; I was like a zombie at work the whole morning. I always enjoyed long sleeps but lately I have the need to sleep even during the day. Seven hours night sleep is not enough. I go downstairs; my dad is on the couch half asleep. I get in the kitchen and see there is food on a plate. I take a diet coke from the fridge and go in the living room to eat while watching TV. It has been many days that I have not watched the news. I remember I have not called my mum yet and I make a promise to do that, once my dad is up, so he can also talk to her. I finish my food, wash my plate and sit next to my dad until he is up.

"Hello sweetie. Are you ok? I did not see you this morning."

"I know dad, sorry. I was really sleepy when I woke up and I needed to be at the store at ten so I just got dressed and left."

"Are you feeling sick?"

"No, nothing like that…It’s just…you know I love sleep. That’s all don’t worry."

"Ok, fine. Kellan passed by this morning and he did not look happy. He was looking for you."

"Well, I guess I will see him later. Oh by the way I am not planning to come to the pub tonight. I was thinking of watching a movie. I work at ten again tomorrow."

"Ok sure…"

"Now, have you already made that call?"

"To mum?"

"No, to Jesus! Yes to mum…"

"Nope…"

"Fine, bring the phone, we do that together." I dial my home phone number and I am thinking she must be home now. It is already eight in the evening in Greece…She picks up and after we have a quick hello in Greek I tell her I will speak in English as my dad is sitting next to me and I want him to be able to understand. I also beg her to be nice with him; you never know if she gets angry after what I am planning to tell her. It is not his fault in the end.

"So how are you?"

"I am good, how are you? All in place in Galway?" I can understand she is smiling now.

"Yes we are all set here! Well, actually more than set…I wanted to tell you…" I look at my dad and he is a bit stressed and restless now; well that makes two of us!

"Yes?"

"I wanted to tell you that I was thinking of staying here for a while, more than a couple of weeks."

"Tita did anything happened? Please put dad on the phone!" I roll my eyes and pass it on to dad and I hear him reassuring her that nothing bad has happened; everything is going fine. He gives back the phone, telling me that when I am finished he wants to talk again.

"Hello again mum."

"So you are ok!"

"Yes I am ok. Why shouldn’t I?"

"No reason…nothing! Why are you staying then?"

"I do not have anything to do back in Greece. I got a job here…"

"You got a job?"

"Yes, at a very nice music store. It’s only part time but still I would get some money and I wanted to spend some time with dad. I will be closer to Edinburgh if I needed to travel for any last minute arrangements. And you can come…Dad said he wanted to invite you; an open invitation…"

''He did?"

"Yes, in fact he wants to talk to you now."

"He does?''

"Yes mum. Are we good?"

"Well ok? Do you have everything you need?"

"No, actually I was thinking that you coming here for a weekend sometime soon would be ideal, as you could bring me some stuff…"

"We'll see…"

"I will let you know what I need. Love you. Bye…talk to dad now…"

"Love you too…" But before she finishes her sentence dad is on the phone.

"You love me, ha?"

"Well not you!"

"Oh! That hurt!" I hear them laughing now, and I can feel my dad is full of joy, so I go outside to give them some space…I lie on my hammock for a while and as it is getting darker and chillier now, I feel the refreshing humidity of the plants and earth around me, wrapping me; I am at ease. It’s so nice and normal when I am outside. D was right. I already feel much happier. Well anyway, this thing with mum went great and I am seeing D tonight. We will actually spend time together…like a normal couple. That would be interesting. In less than ten minutes I see my dad leaving for the pub in a hurry but really cheerful. I ask how it went and he just gives me a thumps up gesture and screams.

"She will visit soon!" I am really giggling by his obvious joy and love for my mum.

He is gone now and I am alone. The time is a bit past six in the afternoon and I remember that I have not replanted my flower yet. So I get up from the seesaw and go on the porch to find my flower still wrapped in the towel. I unwrap the cloth to see that it is starting to be wizened. I am feeling a bit sad for not paying the proper attention to it and I decide to do my best, if there is any chance to revive it. I go to the back of the yard where my dad has his gardening tools and get a mattock and a shovel. I decide to plant it close to the tree that holds my hammock. This way it would be closer to me when I rest there. I get down on my knees and start digging a hole and as I cram my bare hands into the ground, the sensation is remarkable. I feel like I am touching a living organization and earth responds to my touch, by channeling strength and love and rapture to me. I guess this is how surgeons must feel when they touch human organs while surgery. I keep digging until I have a big enough hole. I put the roots of the flower inside and start filling the hole with dirt. I cannot make the flower stand straight though. It has gone sear, so it is folding and the wonderful purple petals are touching the ground. I am trying to uphold it but it’s no use and then I hear a voice coming from behind.

"Ye nid to giv lif’ to ‘t…"

What? Who is that? I turn my head and I manage to see it only for a second of time, as it runs in the fields and disappears. What was this? It looked like a dwarf! I am not kidding. It was small and funny looking, with a tall hat and a beard. I am losing it. Maybe it was a squirrel and I just imagined the rest. But it spoke. What did it really say? Something like ‘ye nid to lif tot’. What the hell does this mean? I nid to lif to it? I need to … life to it? Oh my God, it said I need to give life to it; to the flower. Did it say give? How do I give life to it? I am thinking about how earth was channeling all this power to me before and I am wondering whether I could channel life this to the flower. I put both my hands around the pedicel that is bent and I try to channel strength. I have strength from the earth. I feel that… can I really pass it on? I close my eyes and I am thinking that all my energy is focused at my hands. I feel it happening. I open my eyes to see my hands glowing and the flower seems to straighten up. I keep holding it with one hand and I put the other one on the petals, which seem like blossoming. Wow! This is impossible. Cool…I leave the flower with care and I see now that it is fully standing, really beautiful. I am so proud. That was beyond imagination. How can I do that? And what was this creature, which came to talk to me? It appeared in front of me, actually behind me, but still it was brave enough to do it. Do I really have followers?

My hands are full of dirt but I do not mind now. I sit on the bench of the kiosk, thinking I want to see them. I want to talk to them. D said when I am ready; I should get in nature and call for them…He means even during the day? Does all this work only at night? Well, let’s find out. What did Aisha say? Open up my senses. I inhale and identify the scents around… I smell the wet ground, the leaves, the blossoming flowers, the fertility of the pollen; I am a part of nature and nature is a part of me. I look around and I whisper…

"Hi!" I hear the wind blowing a salutation back and it’s like a warm welcome. It is a bit witty to sit alone and talk to invisible creatures but my instinct tells me I should do it, so I follow it.

"Where are you? Please make yourselves visible for me!" There are tinny voices and whispers all around me but I cannot see anything, so I am speaking again, with more demand now…

"I am asking you to reveal yourselves. I am here to meet you and introduce myself…I am not going to harm you…"

"Mi quennn…" The voice comes from behind me. I turn suddenly, to face a tiny airborne creature flying around the kiosk. It approaches me and there in front of my eyes, it changes into a woman-wise figure with wings and really long hair. I have witnessed it and still I cannot believe how this is possible. I look closely to see she is much like the fairy pictures, I have seen in books before, like the ones I have been drawing. She has long blondish hair and two enormous wings compared to her body and she is ‘greenish’, all of her. Not actually green but her skin is so pale …I could see her veins if she had any. I do not know how to describe it. I mean her body and face and everything…she is like a huge flying caterpillar color wise; but really beautiful…fairy tale beautiful…a bit dreamy…She is not wearing clothes but her feature is not naked. And there are no breasts or other woman-like parts. I need to relax. I don’t want to scare her off and also I want to show some respect.

"Hello…"

"Halow…"

"Who are you?"

"Mi nome e Tirinda y em a fluorei fae…"

"Ok, I got the name, Tirinda... What language is it you speak?"

"Faelis…"

"Faelis, what language is that?"

"Thi oldie one."

"So are there more of you?"

"Yi…milun…us waitish ir Quennn…" Her pronunciation is strange, she stresses the 'n' and skipping words, so I hope I understand correctly when I rephrase this to something like "millions, waiting our Queen!"

"Do you know who I am?"

"Ir Quennn!"

"How do you know?"

"Nihts befir tha u spok wit thee dork maestre…"

"I am really sorry Tirinda, I do not understand what you are saying…do you know how to speak English?"

"I speak with my mind so I can speak everything. 'ν προτιμάς ελληνικά παρακαλώ πες το μου…she tells me also in Greek…"

"English is fine thank you… So you speak Faelis, English, Greek and more; wow! I wish I could do that…"

"What do you mean my Queen? Of course you can…if you speak with your mind…"

And then I notice that she is not moving her lips as she speaks but still I can hear her; interesting.

"So what else do we do?"

"We?"

"Yes, you and I…and I don’t know the rest of the fairies…"

"You and I are not the same… I am a flower fairy. You on the other hand are the Queen of Fairies… There are thousand different breeds of us…"

"So how would I learn more about me? Everybody is speaking in riddles."

"You need to find the 'lady of the mortals'…she is the connection between the two worlds…She can tell you everything you need to know…''

"Oh, you mean Aisha?"

"Maybe…"

"I have found her…I still do not know much though!" So I decide to proceed and ask her what I need to know…

"Ok, so, where do we live?"

"In the fields, in the lakes, on the mountains; depends on the breed."

"What do we eat?"

"Everything and nothing… We can eat whatever mortals eat…but we do not enjoy cooked food. Centuries ago our race was unspoiled but nowadays we have been affected much by mortals. We really prefer raw food though!"

"You can take other forms as well?"

"How do you see me? I usually take the form others expect to see."

"I see you really beautiful, with wings, and a bit green…"

"Green ha? This is what you think of fairies then…"

"How do you hide?"

"I just get in the plantation, or the ground, that’s easy… It’s more difficult to appear!"

"Do you think I could change?"

"I guess you have attributes coming from all the breeds but I have not met a queen ever before, so I cannot tell you for sure."

"How old are you?"

"You mean in mortal years? I don’t really know. We just count the millenniums I guess."

"I know there are evil creatures. What are they?"

"There is evil everywhere my Queen."

"Even among fairies?"

"Of course."

"What should I do?"

"What do you mean? I don’t know…" Suddenly she gets alarmed; she looks toward the other direction and says…"

"I need to go now…He is coming!"

"Please wait."

"I am sorry my Queen. If I don’t go I may not live another day…"

She flies away. Well crap. I did not get everything I wanted. Anyway, that much was good I guess. She said he is coming. Maybe D is already here. Why does she think he would hurt her? I enter the house to wash my hands and clean up. I see that I am still in my morning clothes, so I also change in black tights and a bit sexy dress. I want to look beautiful tonight. I go downstairs to get out when I suffer a threatening feeling. There is something wicked outside. I open the door reluctantly, to find Kellan sitting on the porch, as last time he met me here; only this time his eyes are not happy and welcoming. He seems angry and confused and deprived… I sigh and ask him to join me at the kiosk. He walks really quickly towards me and he speaks, but his voice is not Kellan’s. His voice is cold and strict and vicious.

"I was looking for you yesterday, and again this morning."

"Hello Kellan. Well you know I have a mobile for emergencies."

"It wasn’t an emergency!"

"Anyway you found me now. How are you?" I can’t believe that he speaks to me so unemotionally. This is my best friend. The only friend I ever loved. And not to forget; the guy I have been making out for a couple of times just a few days ago.

"I am more than fine. How are you?" Is he ironic? What the hell is going on? I decide to let it go and be polite.

"I am good. Work is fine. This guy Mark is great and the music he plays is very nice. There are not a lot of people buying but still I enjoy it."

"Good for you. So you are really staying!"

"Yes I am. When are you going back to Edinburgh?"

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"Kellan! What is going on with you? It’s me, remember! Your Tita…"

"You have changed."

"I have grown up; maybe you should do the same!"

"Indeed!"

"Come on now I don’t want to fight with you. Come here…"

I put my arms around him to hug him but he stays still. After a few minutes that I don’t lose my embrace, he holds me back and he buries his face in my neck. I feel he smells my hair and I get some scattered thoughts from his mind. He is thinking of kissing me again. He is thinking it feels so right to hold me in his arms and that I am his. He is thinking that if there is anyone else he can kill him. I am shocked by the image I see in his thoughts. There is something really evil in his head and I am wondering, who did that. My Kellan was always well-mannered and sweet. He is still gorgeous but he has lost his kind touch. I lose my embrace but then he is making a move. Oh s**t! Not again…

"Kellan stop it!"

"Shut up, I want to kiss you!"

"No…Ι said no Kellan." I am trying to set myself free; I know I am strong. How can he be stronger? He is all over me when I feel a hot mist of air throwing him away, with his back on the ground. He looks upset and confused. But instantly he is on his feet again. When did Kellan start to move so fast? He is really angry now and he is approaching me again, only to see the same wave of mist pushing him back. He is really powerful but the mist is stronger, so he retreats. He is taking a defensive position right now; he looks like a wounded animal. I am trying to pacify him when I hear him shrieking in the air.

"Whatever you are, make yourself visible!"

"Who are you talking to Kellan…?"

"You should know better."

"Make yourself visible or I will hurt her I swear."

Now I am really annoyed. Who is he that he thinks he can hurt me? I am an immortal for all that matters. I am thinking of kicking his butt. My rage is exploding inside me and in a sharp move I find myself standing in front of him. I punch him really hard on his face. He did not expect that and now he is bemused, so I find the opportunity to grab him by his shirt and pull him close to my face, so I can look into his eyes…

"Who are you? What did you do to my best friend?"

"I am your best friend still. You are not who you used to be. You have changed and it is not for the best! She was right. I should have listened to her…"

Being so close to him hurts. I hear his thoughts and feel the disappointment. I feel the love he keeps in his heart for me. Maybe he is just jealous. But then I see his neck and it carries two round small marks. I am recalling the dream I had. Could this be it? He cries out to me…

"I loved you so much. I still do. Leave all this and come with me." He comes closer and I am thinking he will kiss me again, but he turns his head and opens his mouth to bite me. I can see his fangs; suddenly, he is lifted in the air and thrown away with his back against the tree. He stands but before he flies away, he is in my face whispering.

"I will kill him and then you will be mine." And he is gone.

 

 

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Special thanks to you for taking the time to read these first chapters of my book. You can find 'The Essence of Eternity -I- Awaken' at https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/181181 free until end of July 2012.

Your opinion is significant for me. Please take the time to leave a comment at the site from which you downloaded this book.

 

''The Essence of Eternity - II - Quest'' will be released soon.

Author's Note

Dear viewer,
your feedback is always important and welcome to help me imrpove.
Please leave a comment.
Thanks for taking your time to read my book.
F.P.Chat

Reviews

[Rhea752]

HOLY CRAPOLA!!!! that was amazing. i loved the plot the suspense the characters. there were points when the dialogue was a little awkward but other that amazingly done!!!!!!!!!! :D

[F.P. Chat]

First of all mio thanks for your time. I understand is way more time consuming than a poem. I am really happy you liked it and I hope you download it (it's free) and read the rest. I would definitely be interested in your review overall. Anyway many thanks again...