Dream of dead loves

One dream, I plead,
One dream at a time,
Just give me one dream to gnaw at my mind,
These waves upon waves of Remorse when I sleep,
come crashing, destroying the walls of my keep.

Like an army of Memories, Regrets and past Woes,
they march upon me in nigh endless rows,
these Memories they claw and they tear at my walls,
while my army of anger falls back to the halls,
and my people of Joy, what valiant dumb heros!
they clamber to arms like they're more then mute zeros,
with smiles and glow they man the empty posts,
more clueless then newborns and whiter then ghosts,
while the hordes of regret and dead loves Amass,
sure that this next wave will break me at last,
to the chamber of my King, where Honor resides,
where they will efface him like a stone in the tide,

I pray not for victory, not a triumph of good,
but remove these dreams from the thoughts that I keep!
And give me, at last, one nights peaceful sleep.

Reviews

[Jerbear The Great]

I second what Pheonix said. Bro, your writing is starting to look quite a bit like the poetry i wrote in Granada Hills when I was depressed as s**t. I'm here for you bro!

[Phoenix]

Oh I love this one! I really do! It's like those first few lines I saw before were a preview and finally this is the whole epic movie!! The first five lines, especially, are so awesomely "well writen" Ok that's not enough for you so......Structurally pretty perfect to me, except the last three lines. Perhaps you could have made it at least four lines so that the flow wouldn't be so awkward. And for the picture you created, no "triumph of good"??? Are you saying you don't want goodness to win out in this battle? Joy is no hero or fighter, you need something stronger on your side.