The Fight

a grey haze

coiling in

sealing off the world

muted and desolate

spiraling at your feet

grazing your cold skin

snatching back its hand

folding within itself

churning and livid

reaching up

the sky blackens

one step

breathe

the veil darkens

two steps

exhale

smokey forms shift to take you

crawling on

never forget what you're fighting for

Reviews

[mouse]

dude I love this peom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[Jeff]

Wonderful imagery!

[Dream Weaver]

A dazzling display of imagery which
screams uncontrolled chaos. A doom
and gloom scenario well done…

[GTVile]

This was pretty excellent. Just two things though, spelling and punctuation. Line 6: grazing "your" cold skin. Last line: "never for get what "you're" fighting for. Beyond that, the piece speaks well and keeps the reader wondering what the grey haze is. Is it our own folly? Is it evil? Is it our own inability to reach our own goals? Very thought-provoking.