Stay Awhile

Cinnamon ash sillage Left behind in this city of light, Beaded crimson and black satin, But a decoration in the world of goodbyes. Sweet, sweet love of mine, A game of cards, a bottle of wine, Sweep the tears and search for smiles, How I wish you could stay awhile. Dripping pearls and shattering diamonds, We've defied the odds before, With glittering eyes and a haunted grin, We've known all along there's elegance within. The ballad of a dove,

Brightens the twisted roads of love, A letter written with a rose's tail, Is attatched to a sunken sail, Strung to the maidens, pretty and bright, Drowning now from your sudden flight.

But I won't be double-crossed like them,

I'll stay afloat and learn to swim.

So stay awhile longer, my dear,

And whisper words of reassurance

In my waiting ear.

Author's Note

Reviews? Please don't be afraid to be critical. Just don't be mean. Thanks, bro :)

Reviews

[Seshat Nidaba]

A very musical feel, a happy wishful journey. A girl learning about the ups and downs of love, finding her heart's unbroken song, nativating the tricks of the trade, of being a woman. That was my impression behind the words...

[Greg G]

I really liked the imagery used in this poem, and the way that if flowed from one image to the next. I also liked that the rhyme scheme wasn't pervasive. The only thing I might do is break it up into stanzas, though it's not really necessary if you prefer the way it is now. It's probably more of my own preference than anything else.

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

Beautiful words, showing a special heart.

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

your imagery is intoxicating~ it is surreal and luxuriant~

"A letter written with a rose's tail"

pure magik~

[Ben Taylor]

Ah, very nice :) In so many of the poems i read the rhyming sounds forced and unnatural, but this flowed excellently. Also, the images evoked by this poem are amazing.

Although: I have never heard the word "sillage" before and the definition wasn't in the two dictionaries I checked, so, I would love to know what that word means. lol. You should definitely message me the definition because I enjoy learning new words. Thankkss :)