Warming Up

 

 

caught up

in swells

of random hope

fathoms deep

the air thick

my visions sicken

swallowed in thin

waters drowning

partially suffocated

in mild winds

 

the lack of depth

in the failure of surface

struggling with pointless tools

my carpenter has quit

for fear of lay offs

 

from here

there is no top

nor sides

containment is tangible

dimensions numbing

and evasive

not elusive

 

sometime

from somewhere

that voice will arise

and I will prepare for him

my last remaining light

no matter how

long his journey

from the bottom

knowing this always

 

 

robin

Reviews

[Angel's Lady]

caught up
in swells
of random hope
fathoms deep ---- And I found myself amidst the ebb and flow...

Very nicely written, Robin.

there is no top
nor sides
containment is tangible --- You always seem to paint the exact picture, so I'm never left guessing.

dimensions numbing
and evasive
not elusive

WRITE ON! Author, author!

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

This reminds my of a psychology test where one of the questions is how would you feel in an all white room with no windows and no doors. It is meant to represent your feelings about death. Somehow this is my interpretation of this work. I may be way off but there is a melancholic, heavy tone to this work that is truly moving. Thank you for sharing.
Light,
Siddartha

[lilain]

I feel this. It sinks into my bones and leaves me shivering for 'him' to return. I know 'him', 'he's' always there beneath the waters, but 'he' doesn't always surface and certainly not when I expect 'him' to. Of course, we could be speaking of very different 'hims'... hymns... in which case I'm all messed up in the head... but it is about interpretation.

Thanks for sharing... now I'm off to the next one.

[Seriana]

"and evasive
not elusive"

Robin, what a wonderful view into your soul. That verse above really grabbed at me for some reason. evasive, not elusive.....grrrr, it's almost like a little jab, a poking at the conscience.

I like the simplicity of this piece. And I love when you try out new writing. It's interesting to see what comes from your head. :)

[Broken.]

I have missed the pleasure for the mind in your poems robin,
My favorite was--
from here

there is no top
nor sides
containment is tangible
dimensions numbing
and evasive
not elusive

I could just read those over and over again :)
I will visit again someday..

[Gandré]

the lack of depth

in the failure of surface ---------often this! Great writing!

[Periac]

the lack of depth
in the failure of surface


my god do i love this my friend
a softer side of you perchance.........

[Dani California]

This is a great piece Robin. A little different style than I'm used to reading from you, though it suites you well.

There is always hope, yes. Even when we've hit bottom. It is there that we find the only way left to go is up.

Wonderful flow, as has all of your work. Outstanding. :)

It still has that wonderful signature of yours, Robin. And it is good.

Your fundamentals are amazing, as always.

The imagery is very crisp and minimalist, well use of words yet has a powerful impact imparting its message.

A wonderful piece.

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

Deep feelings, disillusions seem to make hope a mystery. But the reality there's always an open because you point out so there is always a way for hope to come in:

there is no top
nor sides
containment is tangible
dimensions numbing
and evasive
not elusive


Very nice write.

[Michael X]

Robin, expressing the type of writing that give beat poetry is name. This is one of the most subtle poems
I've read from you. the tone justifies the rhythm and pace, metaphorically heightened and open
to reader interpretation, quite passionate, sensuous and strikes me as enigmatic erotica,
stunning and simply well written..thanks for sharing your talent.