Getting Help

"A habit is a shirt made of iron."- Czech Proverb
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I had skipped school and Jody had joined me into going to see my father against my wishes but she wouldn't back down. I cut the engine when I saw his car parked in the drive way. I got out of the car and put my hood on my sweatshirt up so it would hide his damage. I walked in and saw him crying over a photograph. I stood in the door way. Jody was behind me in the hall. He looked up when I cleared my throat.

“Where were you?” I just stood there.

“I had to leave, you were a danger. Remember anything?” He stood but kept his distance.

“No but I imagine we had a fight. There is a rather large dent in my wall, you will be paying for.” I laughed. And pulled back my hood.

“I believe I have the upper hand right now.” He stumbled into a chair.

“Now do you remember?” I said moving closer to him making sure he got a look at me but he turned his head.

“Look at me! Look at the damage you did!” I grabbed his face roughly and forced it around to meet mine.

“Remember choking me to the wall? Blaming me for my mothers death? Then kicking my a*s? I shoved you into that wall to stop you. I could easily have you arrested.” He looked shocked.

“You wouldn't do that, I'm all you have.” I chuckled.

“No he has me James.” Jody came around the wall.

“Who are you?” He stood and I roughly shoved him back down.

“That is the mother of your daughter. Best be nice or I will knock your a*s through the wall.” He looked at me.

“I don't have a daughter.” I shook my head.

“Think oh sixteen years ago. Right after my mother died. You most certainly do have a daughter.” He looked between her and me and it dawned on his face.

“Why haven't I seen her then?”

“Actually you have, but you haven’t formally met because you are a disaster. You need to go get help. Stop drinking and come to terms that my mother is dead! I kept her from you.” He sat back and ran his hand along his short brown hair.

“I want to see her.” I shook my head.

“No.” He stood.

“You can't keep me from her.” He advanced and I shoved him against the wall in the manner he had me last night.

“You aren't a father! Don’t say you are. Fathers don’t beat there children. You will check into therapy, you will get help. Until then you wont see me or her.” He sat back like he was burned by my threat.

I went to him and handed him the number.

“Call them, have them help you. Otherwise I can't come back.” He took the number and I went upstairs to pack him some clothes in a bag. I packed a photo of when we were young and we were sitting by the lake we looked happy. I came back down and he was just getting off the phone.

“Here are the things you are going to need.” He took the bag.

“Their going to pick me up in an hour.” I nodded and hugged him.

“Your going to get help. This is habit is a shirt made of iron, all its doing is weighing you down.” He pulled back and looked at me.

“How did you become so smart.” I looked him dead in the eye.

“I had to grow up.” He sighed and sat down.

“Who is going to stay at the house while I am gone?” I smiled.

“Well Jody, Amy and I will be here.” I looked to Jody who had tears forming in her eyes.

“I know I didn't tell you but here has got to be better than being in that small apartment. You will be closer to the hospital and Amy can go to my school and get out of the slum.”

“What about Sienna?” I sat down.

“Doesn't her parents live on the border line?” There was an imaginary line that split the town and divided it.

“Yeah.” I said not getting to the point.

“Have her transfer.” I looked at my dad.

“I know you are in love with her son. I wasn't blind to it when they were over. Just be careful, Carson is just like his father.” I stood face to face with my father.

“I wouldn't know what his father is like. You haven't told me. But he is the one who took my mother not me. You have to stop blaming my existence for her death.” He sat down and picked up a photo. I looked at it and it was of my mother holding me.

“She was dead! She never knew me.” He sighed.

“She did know you. The papers you read weren’t accurate. You mother was with us for a month. She held you and was so proud. She knew you would do big things. But there was a blood clot from the accident and when they took her to the hospital. She fought for a month before she died. I had to pry you from her arms. Even in her last moments she held on to you.” I choked back the tears looking at my mother smiling holding me.

“Why? I grew up thinking she never knew me. Why didn't you tell me?” I looked to my father who had tears coursing down his face.

“I couldn't, you were my baby boy. I forgot to watch you grow up. I had thought you were a lot less mature then you are. I haven’t been seeing you for who you are. I am sorry for that son. Your mother would be so proud of the man you've become.” There was a knock on the door and he stood with the people who were going to help him.

“I will see you soon and I will tell you all about your mother.” I went to him and hugged him. I stood back and watched him leave. I sat down on the couch and looked through the photographs, my mother looked sick but there was a glow that covered it, but you could still notice. Jody came to my side.

“Did you really mean for us to move in here?” I looked up at her.

“My sister should be close where I can watch her. And I think she would like it a lot.” She sat down next to me.

“So tell me about this love of Sienna, I only saw a small part.” I sat back and told her of my past.