Regret

The damage was done. Regret spread across his face and tears trickled down his eyes. His hand, clenching the gun, trembled like a freshly caught fry when exposed to the unpleasant mixture of dry air and scorching heat of the sun above water. Red splotches sat triumphantly on his clothes. A cool breeze swept past his face, failing miserably to placate the situation even slightly. He knew he hadn’t been thinking straight. But it was over now. If regret and repentance could fix things up, more hearts would’ve been won than battles in the past. It’s over, it’s over... The nine-year-old sighed, his hopes completely crushed. I’ll never play paintball again.

Reviews

[Nisha M.]

Aw this is a sad one. I loved the way you describe the details. Have to say, my favourite line is "If regret and repentance could fix things up, more hearts would’ve been won than battles in the past." Personally, to me, this was an example of how regret could come about and I loved the way you portrayed it by using an example of a 9-year-old who regrets playing paintball. Good job! - Nisha.

[Zoya]

I am really glad you liked it, Nisha. Thank you very much for your time and review! :)

[Onlyme]

Nicely expressed and nice projected in this tale of a little boy playing paintball.

[Zoya]

Thanks for the read! :)

[송지ፏ..]

Nice I liked it. It was easy to understand and it had a good flow.

[Zoya]

Thank you!

[Najam Us Saher]

When I saw your read request I was sure I would read something amazing. This was upto my expectations. Wonderful. Perfect description through your words that created a tension and war like imagery. And the end, Ah! What a twist.

[Zoya]

Thank you, Najam. You are ever so kind to me :))

[Najam Us Saher]

Your stories make me happy. It is my pleasure reading them. ☺

[Zoya]

And that makes ME happy :)

[Coyote Poetry]

A surprise ending to the story. I liked it. Thank you Zoe for sharing the excellent story.
Coyote

[Zoya]

Thank you so much, Coyote. Appreciated as always :)

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Zoe.

[Stella Armour]

I just saw this and thought i would have a read... i love it... wonderful ending!

[Zoya]

So glad you loved it. Thank you :)

[Suhd]

Quite cleverly told. The innocence of a nine year old and his heart-break. The final sentence gives it a bitter-sweet ending. It also makes it trivial and in that it seems a comedy of errors :D Nicely done.

[Zoya]

I'm glad you liked it. Thank you very much :)

[Hope]

I loved the way the story revealed itself in the end. While reading, I had in mind an extreme situation, like war, heartbreak or sth, but the end was a pleasant surprise. Though whatever you said has a deeper meaning. Good job!

[Zoya]

Thank you very much for your words here, Neetha. I appreciate that :)

[wordman]

sad write zoe,creative ,and well penned my friend

[Zoya]

Thank you, wordman. I'm glad you liked it.

[wordman]

you`re welcome

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

Sometimes actions and emotions can be overpowering that they take us to places and into situations we later regret- best to reflect and weigh out the situation before going forward- once too late we cannot correct our actions and regret is not a nice thing to be left with- sometimes we need to experience to grow- great write🌹

[Zoya]

Truly said.
Thank you for your words here, Kelly. I do appreciate.

[Davidgeo]

Ha... that's pretty good.

[Zoya]

Thanks for the read. Appreciated.