WHAT YOU ARE TO ME

WHAT YOU ARE TO ME

A Poem by FlawedByDesign
"

What you mean to me...

"

WHAT YOU ARE TO ME


What you are to me cannot be contained on this page.
I dare only compare you to what my eyes can see.


What you are to me;
Is the breath of life kindling souls from slumber,
the tender crackle in their first morning step.
The happiness that fills their joyful being,
as they delight in the allure of this world.


What you are to me;
Is the melody of the morning sunshine
sung across the waking golden horizons.
The mythical oceans of the boundless world,
resounding the azure sky’s exquisite smile.


What you are to me;
Is the elegant wind caressing my soul,
holding my endless hope in its warm embrace.
Destiny’s fate protecting my soulful dreams,
clutching pieces of the puzzle that is me.


What you are to me;
Is the spectrum of colours in my bright mind
painting pictures of you from dusk until dawn.
The night-bird’s song of eternal devotion,
as shadows of the night dance the love away.


What you are to me;
Is the flutter of butterflies in my heart,
whenever I witness your dazzling beauty.
The euphoric splendor in my moonlit eyes,
as your sweet lips utter the words, “I love you”


What you are to me;
Is the luminous star in the nighttime sky,
cradling my precious wishes to fruition.
The moon’s charming gaze whispering lunar dust,
showering the Earth with radiance and grace.


Know that you are all this, and so much more to me!

© 2010 FlawedByDesign


Author's Note

FlawedByDesign
Winner of the following contest,
http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/Poetry-Contest!!!/11231/

My Review

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Featured Review

Obviously, the first thing I'm going to do here is to praise the imagery. Very impressive! I would not start quoting lines here, as I do not intend to post your poem again for you. Almost all lines are exquisite. This is true poetry.
I think the matter of fact tone with which you describe such images of splendor lends the poem an enchanting tone. Just like someone is telling his love what she means to him. Rhyme might have detracted from this, so your choice of structure is very well thought of!
I will attempt to point out a few areas where this poem can be improved though. In my opinion atleast!
3rd stanza, last line
"resounding the azure sky’s exquisite smile."
The phraze azure sky is quite cool! I've used it myself, once. But "resounding" doesn't seem to be the word that should have been used here. Maybe you should investigate this.
4th stanza, second line. This is so negligible a flaw, you might become incensed, lol. But I'm a perfectionist ;) And I think "it’s" should really have been "its".. "its" is a possessive pronoun, which is what you mean here, while "it's" is an abbreviation of "it is"
5th stanza, fourth line. I think the article "the" wasn't needed at the beginning of the line.
You would have recognized that these shortcomings are of minor import, and do not detract from the awesomeness of this poem :)
Another great job!

Posted 14 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This poem blew me away. I am lost for words. I don't know what to say. I read the title and the poem isn't quite what I expected. I expected it to be more about self-worth and love. But that was my mistake I have noticed this is written truly from the heart and I inspire this poem. Looking back at it I felt like the words to this poem was thrown at me affecting my moods. I guess that is very powerful and stunning

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 3 people found this review constructive.

out standing! :) imagery just shouts at you but at the same time soothes the mind..

Posted 14 Years Ago


Very touching

Posted 14 Years Ago


This was a gorgeous write,simply that ...cause the words are so eloquently phrased that they have a strong impact on the reader's mind,they flow like the tranquil blue stream and the poem is as serene as the azure blue sky you mentioned here.Often when two people are in love,they do keep saying that 'you mean a lot to me'..that almost always is said,but to be supplemented by such breathtaking phrases is rare.
I read @rhyming's review..the it's and its..:) well not to worry there,you've got company here..I made that error in almost all my poems that i had posted initially here unless a friend pointed out.I t seems such a negligible grammatical error yet when you pay attention to it, a significant change is made in your writes..
I must get to your other writes soon..

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Beautiful, but I've come to expect nothing less than you. I think I'd like to see the world through your eyes for a day :) The fact that this flows so smoothly without rhyming is also a credit to your skill as a writer!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A wonderful free flowing poem which really touches the reader's heart.truly inspiring and evocative through each stanza impressing the meaning behind such romantic notions.I guess we wouldn't be human if we weren't FLAWED BY DESIGN.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Obviously, the first thing I'm going to do here is to praise the imagery. Very impressive! I would not start quoting lines here, as I do not intend to post your poem again for you. Almost all lines are exquisite. This is true poetry.
I think the matter of fact tone with which you describe such images of splendor lends the poem an enchanting tone. Just like someone is telling his love what she means to him. Rhyme might have detracted from this, so your choice of structure is very well thought of!
I will attempt to point out a few areas where this poem can be improved though. In my opinion atleast!
3rd stanza, last line
"resounding the azure sky’s exquisite smile."
The phraze azure sky is quite cool! I've used it myself, once. But "resounding" doesn't seem to be the word that should have been used here. Maybe you should investigate this.
4th stanza, second line. This is so negligible a flaw, you might become incensed, lol. But I'm a perfectionist ;) And I think "it’s" should really have been "its".. "its" is a possessive pronoun, which is what you mean here, while "it's" is an abbreviation of "it is"
5th stanza, fourth line. I think the article "the" wasn't needed at the beginning of the line.
You would have recognized that these shortcomings are of minor import, and do not detract from the awesomeness of this poem :)
Another great job!

Posted 14 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

You definitely know how to touch women's hearts. This is really beautiful. Your word choices are gorgeous and each stanza builds on the previous, making the reader hold their breath till the end. This is a very remarkable love poem.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

What this is to me is a beautiful, expressive romantic love poem...
It reminds me of "How do I Love Thee" in some ways ... a beautiful romantic poem very enjoyable.

Chloe

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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1209 Views
26 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on July 6, 2010
Last Updated on August 17, 2010
Tags: poem, poetry, love, romance, devotion, affection, adoration, beauty, indescribable

Author

FlawedByDesign
FlawedByDesign

Stratford, Ontario, Canada



About
The name is Ivan - I'm 31. I am originally from Bosnia and Herzegovina. I left my country in 94 because of the civil war. After emigrating, my family lived in France for 2 years before coming to Canad.. more..

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