____ City of Lights ____

'Once upon a time, a very long time ago, I used to know him. Until .....'

He's stranded.

Looking at those waves rushing towards the shore, making the sands wet, rushing like they were meant to, like there's no way back, rushing towards him, rushing like they want to tell him something. And here he was, standing aloof from everything. Here he was, with no enthusiasm or strength to move, move away from those waves, from the sand. At the very thin line, at the very vulnerable boundary of faith and fate, where he wished he stood firm like he did on the sands under his feet, he tripped.. And now he's at the edge of time, at the edge of everything that he has known, felt, dreamed, kept and wished for.

The coast was vacant; no one could have bothered asking him what's on his mind. There was just the sound of sea gulls filling the void in the ecosystem and the ear splitting sound of the waves. His stare was fixed at those waves since... since he set foot at the shore.

He's recalling;

He was given ample warning not to interfere. He didn't listen. He was told to stay away, as far as he could, but he couldn't. He kept praising the words of glory and freedom that were thrust in his head by them. He was told he can choose; choose between the people or them. The former meant living like an insect, like a dog and let his fate command him. And the later meant choosing freedom indeed. They told him to join them and be one of them... for there's no other way around the city, this city, the city of lights. And how they'll all purify the city from the daemons within, and so he chose freedom.

Some days passed, no one heard from him, until one day...

He was spotted at the heart of the city, the City Mall. Coincidently we met him while he was making his way out of the mob, and we were just about to enter. He was hastening like a hunchback, too impatient to even throw back a hi or a friendly glance. We found it weird but then we just ignored... until...

I guess he knew that since he left the mall, nothing was going to be the same again. I guess this was his way of taking revenge he was so restless for since years. Vengence in every possible way.

Right outside the entrance a land cruiser with black screens and shades was waiting to escort him away. And then, there it was... For once we all thought that the earth has stopped moving, everything was in slow motion, the sounds of anxiety, anger... fear... Like the sun has descended to kiss the city itself. More than a hundred left their loved ones instantly, leaving behind the memories of bloodshed and suffering.

And while he was moving away he was nervous at first, but when he heard the explosion, his face broke into a sweat of joy and excitement. He had made his mentor proud, he had done his duty. He has given  the city a taste of its own medicine. He was smiling.

The next few days went trawling for new identities. His family knew nothing of his engagements. He left in the mornings and came in the middle of the nights... everyone was concerned at first but then cash started to flow in and they would eventually give in to his lies. The last time he told his family, he was an import export manager of a very reputed firm. They might have argued, except for the little b***h, money, which kept all those sordid thoughts at bay.

He stayed on the path to freedom, scheming, hunting and exterminating. He kept his mentor very happy, and he called him his unborn son... the people called him a Terrorist.

It was Eid that day, though there was nothing much to celebrate but still the city smiled for those who still believed and dwelled within. Today he had a grand mission at his disposal, one that would require him to be extremely careful if he had to make it alive. His house was full with relatives of all ages... until everyone got irritated when some unknown people came to gather him out of the house. Before he left he made sure that the members of the family are calmed and didn't get suspicious of his behavior. He even told his little nieces that he has hid their presents somewhere safe and they should just wait for some more time until the prayers are finished and he would be back to distribute them.

So he was on his way to salvation when he realized he had forgotten something. Something that was of utmost importance to the mission and he just let it slip away from his head... He had to rush back now or else... something stung his heart. He yelled at the top of his lungs to stop the car right where it was and rush back to the house. They asked him what's the matter, but he didn't say. Somehow they made it to the house in no time, and while he was descending from the car, relieved to no extent, he was unaware of his little niece just pulling an object from under his bed...

The explosion occurred only a few meters from where he was... Everything was wrecked... like struck by a thunder bolt.

And now, he's standing here.

The firecrackers which illuminated the city and it's malls, its mosques and offices, have sparked his own house. Only this time he couldn't enjoy it as much as he used to in the past. This firework has left him all alone.

His eyes got heavier from the pain. In one instant, he gave himself to those waves, in pain forever.

His body was found the very next day, at the shores of the city...The city of lights.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Vanessa Whiteley]

Gripping story it hold me from beginning to end. Is this based on a true story? You write 'Once upon a time, a very long time ago, I used to know him. Until .....' and

Some days passed, no one heard from him, until one day...

He was spotted at the heart of the city, the City Mall. Coincidently we met him while he was making his way out of the mob, and we were just about to enter. He was hastening like a hunchback, too impatient to even throw back a hi or a friendly glance. We found it weird but then we just ignored... until...

I guess he knew that since he left the mall, nothing was going to be the same again. I guess this was his way of taking revenge he was so restless for since years. Vengence in every possible way.

This is a fine piece of writing and I like how you show how young men are manipulated by the propaganda of freedom and revenge - I guess it's not that different from young men here also being fooled with words of patriotism and duty to one's country right or wrong. Human fraility and looking the other way when it comes to personal benefit is also well expressed in 'They might have argued, except for the little b***h, money, which kept all those sordid thoughts at bay'.

I especially like the repetition at the beginning but the word 'eager' doesn't sound quite right. I suppose you could use eagerness but I think enthusiasm might work better.

[April Child]

Great story. Hooked me in and held me to the end. I kind of wanted him to suffer a bit more, live with the pain but that's a good sign, it means you really had me disliking him. Good to be reading you again :)