The Storm Divisioned

The Storm Divisioned

A Poem by Jason

 

Leaves lie with perspiration
Dangling by a draft of deception
And so,
It goes with the wind…
 
The autumn trees
Have surely been weathered
By a voice
Of abrupt thunder
Worn
And tethered
 
But diminished not
Is a single feather
Blows away from her heart
Caught by breath from another
A choice of
‘Wherever’
Has settled
Him safely-
As the storm
Of
                Divided
                                Fates
Unite another two
Together

© 2008 Jason


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Featured Review

down to his nether?? you lost me there lol, but the rest of this piece is really great. haha :) and i mean that

"Leaves lie with perspiration
Dangling by a draft of deception
And so,
It goes with the wind�"

really impressed with that opening


"A choice of
'Wherever'
Has settled
Him safely-
As the storm
Of
Divided
Fates
Unite another two
Together"

that part is also pretty amazing. so i guess it was the slight middle part that threw me off - it seemed a little convenient, not enough necessary and profound i guess, which those first and last parts definitely were.

this is a great piece, my dear. you're growing and growing as a writer, it's really cool. :) i'm excited to see what's to come


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

i love the first two lines. really captivated me.

Posted 16 Years Ago


I loved it. The opening was brilliant. I loved how it wasn't the traditional rhyming scheme but it still flowed perfectly like a poem. The meaning was really beautiful and it kept me captivated from start to finish.

Posted 16 Years Ago


and YOU ARE THE PERVERT, NOT ME.


....sort of.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

down to his nether?? you lost me there lol, but the rest of this piece is really great. haha :) and i mean that

"Leaves lie with perspiration
Dangling by a draft of deception
And so,
It goes with the wind�"

really impressed with that opening


"A choice of
'Wherever'
Has settled
Him safely-
As the storm
Of
Divided
Fates
Unite another two
Together"

that part is also pretty amazing. so i guess it was the slight middle part that threw me off - it seemed a little convenient, not enough necessary and profound i guess, which those first and last parts definitely were.

this is a great piece, my dear. you're growing and growing as a writer, it's really cool. :) i'm excited to see what's to come


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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4 Reviews
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Added on June 18, 2008
Last Updated on June 26, 2008

Author

Jason
Jason

Pasadena, CA



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