CHAPTER I

(incomplete)

---Ballyclare, Newtownabbey; Templepatrick Road---

"Charlie!"
I felt something cold and hard against my forehead.
Oh s**t.
I was sleeping on the job.
I jumped up and saluted my boss before getting back to work.
"Hello, I'm Charlie. What can I get you?"

Yes, yes, I know what you're thinking: What kind of loser willingly occupies himself by serving other people at a sub shop?

That would be me.

"I'd like a six-inch tuna sub on Italian bread with American cheese."
I nodded and followed my instructions.
"Will that be all?"
"Yes, please."
"That'll be 4.65€. . .Thank you for your patronage. Have a nice day."

Fun job, right?
No. No, not at all. Not one f*****g bit. I'm vegan, okay? This is not an easy job for me. Not only do I have to handle cold carcasses and aged cow juice, but I have to talk to people AND listen to them. I hate doing both those things unless I like you... And I don't like a lot of people. The only reason I haven't quit this job yet is so I can put food on the table, keep a roof over my head, and save up for California because one of these days, I'm gonna make it as a musician in America. (Hopefully by then I'll have a band, as well.)

As for happiness, the only thing around here that provides for me is Naiad and that'll be just fine until he drugs himself to death. . .I hate the thought of that, but everyone I come to love leaves me in the end; I might as well be honest with myself.

The day rolled on, slow and boring, as usual... Sub, salad, sub, sub, sub, salad, salad, sub; nothing very interesting until something strange occurred.

I was chopping lettuce for a salad when I heard a small thud from my right. I turned, looked the window up and down, and noticed a small bundle of feathers at the bottom of the window.

Now. This was already a difficult moment for me-- I love inhuman creatures and I hate seeing things in pain. . .but I'm ornithophobic. Birds. . .scare me. I'm not quite sure why; It's just something about the way they twitch to look at things alarms me. They move so swiftly. . .It's interesting, but I often fear one will attack me; It would be perfectly easy. I'm a good target for fast moving animals. I'm very strong, but also very slow.

Anyways, the second I saw that little bundle of feathers I dropped everything (literally; I was making chopped salad) and ran outside.