>_<

I am writing because I am sad. I have nothing really to say. I just feel like poop right now. I can't really pin point the reason either. I'm not sure I want to either. I was in a hospital the past four weeks and I just got out. I wish I could know why I have depression. I wish I could know why I cut my arms. I wish I could know why I am sad a lot. Why did my mother have to die when I was so young. Why did she do drugs? Why did she overdose on crack cocaine? Why did she give my middle brother HIV? Is he going to be okay? Why do I keep having flashbacks about my mother? Will they ever go away? I miss my mom. I miss my brother. Why does he have to be in a hospital? Is he gonna get better? Am I crazy? What will become of me in the future? Do I have a future? Why am I crying right now. I am crying because I am sad. I just feel like poop right now. I can't really pin point the reason either. I'm not sure I can either.