Finding My Way

An old poem of mine.

All lies on you

in this haunting dream

I am lost

in this mendless maze

of scattered scenes

Who is who?

Who am I?

You are the clarity

because I never

clearly saw who I was

the escalation of tribulation

has brought you into this mess

into the spotlight

as my savior

here I cannot save myself

because in this frightening place

are parts of my scattered self

lost and fragmented

gather me back together

hold me in place

and stay with me.

Reviews

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

This definitely outlines the need for others to aid us along our way, on our various paths in life. I can empathize with the scattered, fragmented feelings you portray and describe so well. I think we have all felt this way and in need at times. Thank you for sharing. By the way, thank you for your service as well.
Light,
Siddartha

[Christopher 'Windstorm'..]

awsome poem... its like looking into a broken mirror, the fragmaents lay about showing the many faces we talk to ourselves. brilliant.

[Fran Marie]

Deep emotions brought forth in this piece and expressed so well

We all need someone to lean on and

to help us when we feel we can't do it alone~WeLL DonE!!~Fran Marie

[distefano 401]

this brought up a lot of interesting thoughts. you didn't go into detail too much, but let the reader figure it out and think about it. also, i like how you bolded every other line.

[Anima Inspired]

It's funny how as human beings we can be both intolerably solitary and yet we truly do need the touch and comfort of others to help "save us from ourselves" in so many cases. This piece really seemed to delve in to the depth of the human psyche, where people finally break down and admitt that they cannot "go it alone", so to speak.

As for the poem...i would have liked to have seen a little more imagery, a little more showing rather than telling, but overall, i truly enjoyed the read. Nicely done.

[Tomás Ó C..]

Is this a love poem or one of faith?

[BrightEyes]

sometimes we are lucky enough in our lives to find that one person who is our rock; the one who grounds us no matter what life throws our way. great that you have such a person in your life :-)

[Dani California]

I love this... truly love it.

"here I cannot save myself
because in this frightening place
are parts of my scattered self
lost and fragmented
gather me back together
hold me in place
and stay with me.."


*and stay with me*
that is key...
We cannot do it alone, and we aren't meant to. You have really hit
that fact home. This is very well written and its message is powerful!

Great job!!

[Carrie Montgomery]

"I am lost...Who am I?" these are questions I have asked myself often: during times of "tribulation", heartache, and when I have tried to "find myslef". We often lean on others and hope that they can make us happy orwe think maybe they are that missing link, that "something" that will fill the gaps.
I get a religious sense from this...to me, it almost reads like a prayer, like someone is having that talk with God- "help me, get me out of this mess I am in, I know now who you are and what I am..." I guess the words "clarity,tribulation, saviour, save, " all hinted at the religious aspect.
This poem is unique in style and has a nice well-balanced rhythm to it. Well, done! I look forward to reading more of your writing!

[☮]

This is great. It can mean so many things. What comes to mind is someone in the middle of battle... wondering how he got there and how he may return to normalcy. This could also be the confusion of every day life. I definitely relate and enjoy the writing style. Looking forward to more!

[Maria Retz]

This is very good.

It is so simple and yet powerful.

"the escalation of tribulation"

I love this line, it's just excellent