Firelight

Fire

I stare into the blazing flames
Dancing their erotic dance
Crackling
snapping
burning
It puts me in a trance

Reviews

[Hawk Flight]

Little Firebug. I'm surprised that wasnt your nickname within our group

[Fenix Flight]

Mwahahaa I ish a firebug *blaze Blaze Blaze*

[Joshua Rawlins]

Not much to say here in terms of correction. Only thing I would say is that it might be better to change 'it puts' to 'putting', and perhaps 'I stare' to 'Staring'. Also note that 'snapping' and 'burning' aren't in capitals and there is no punctuation, although that might be planned.
I can definitely relate to this poem, well maybe apart from the erotic bit, the rhythm is good. The word erotic and trance gives an image of, at least for me, love making by the fireplace, although coming from a male perspective, we rarely have time to look at anything but the you-know-whats.
I like the lengths of these poems, it's something I'm not able to do very well, but I do enjoy these little tidbits of poetry. Good job!

[ron]

Oooo sensually erotic in an almost pagan dance in the middle of the woods kind of way :)