Prologue

A life of two people entwined together with secrets hidden in the past. Will love be able to conquer over the dark truth.

Frank pulled her to him and looked deep in her eyes and said, "Why do you do this when it troubles you as much as it troubles me. Why do you run away from me?"

Geisha pulled away, unable to answer.

As is he could not bear to be apart from her, Frank reached out desperately for Geisha again and pleaded, "What is it that keeps you away from me? What is tormenting you my love? You do not have to fight this battle alone. Tell me and I promise I will see to the problem. Don’t you have feelings for me anymore? Is that it? "

Frank felt as if tons of questions were bubbling within him and that this may well be his last chance.Geisha knew that her time was up. If she stayed a minute more she would give in and would never let go. She looked away and said one single word that crushed his heart to pieces. She said

" Yes"
A tear slid down her peach like cheeks like a pearl filled with pain. It tore at her heart, but she knew she had to be strong. Frank looked deep into her eyes once more, as if he was searching for the lost love within her, one last time. Like an image, he wished to capture forever in his mind. Then he turned and walked away without a backward glance.

Author's Note

It is my first try let me know what you felt..:)..Thank you

Reviews

[Sheila Kline]

Your words leave me wanting to know what secrets they hold. You have injected just enough emotion and facts to make us ask!
It is very good, and I look forward to reading more!! My favorite line:

A tear slid down her peach like cheeks like a pearl filled with pain. It tore at her heart, but she knew she had to be strong...lovely imagery!!

[Cerise]

Thank you for your wonderful words...:)

[Ama May Cooper]

Its lacking in a hook, this being the first thing a reader see's of a novel , your prolouge is what draws a reader in, makes them wonder and want to read on. Here it is a story in itself there's nothing to call desperatly for any advance. I dont find myself asking why and you have to make the reader, you have to give you reader a reason to read on , but it almost feels like this story is already over

[Cerise]

Thank you for the opinion...but there is a huge reason behind it all..this is jus de start..:)

[Ama May Cooper]

I didn't mean it personally by the way i try to be honest with how i feel about pieces when i review, i will happily read the rest of it by all means and sorry if i offended you. I know alot of pepole dislike reviews that are not always positive

[Cerise]

Hey...chill...i would have never made it public until and unless i wantd opinion...all types of opinion r whole heartedly welcomed and there is nothing wrong is sayign what u feel..:).....and i defi did not gt offended so relax and thank you..:)

[Ama May Cooper]

ah good i just like to be sure :)

[Junert]

Well it makes one want to know what's to happen next. Which is good.

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[Areeba]

I really really liked it, I would like to read more!

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[Barbara Walker]

Great beginning! Could use some punctuation, though.

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[RawrsomeSami]

Holy crap that was great.
So many questions bound through my head, I found this really fascinating.
You did a great job, because I assure you, that doesn't seem like a first try! cx
Also, I think I can see it from Geisha's side. Letting go of the one you love is a hard thing.
But for Frank, I feel a ton of things.
How often an unrequited love has erupt. Truly, a painful emotion to experience.

[Cerise]

Thank you soo much. it meant a lot

[RawrsomeSami]

You're welcome, cx

[khalid]

nothing a person would feel worse than feeling unwanted by the one they love, i pity on Frank and i wonder, if she is the one who chose to finish the relation between them, she has deeply hurt him, why was she the one to cry? women are really still a mysterious book for men up till now!

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[khalid]

welcome

[Dayran]

I think Frank got the message.

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[char]

Tell me more about this "dark truth".

[Ufi Auttorri ~ Amy C. T..]

I feel that, emotionally, it has potential to move a reader in the desired direction. Personally, I felt anguish for both characters and for the reader that must try to ignore the phrasing. It's clear what you are trying to say but, as others have mentioned, it needs a serious rewrite to improve the grammar. For example, "Frank held, her his hands on her hips"... what on earth is this?! I know you see it in your mind's eye as you (try to) write it but it's just not coming out in a way that makes sense. Worse, it's the very first sentence. You need to sharpen that first sentence. It's the "hook" that brings the reader into the rest of the scene. The way that you say it is like a promise to the reader that you will keep if they continue reading. And you want them to continue reading I'm sure. Good work but keep at it. :)

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)

[Nicole~!]

(￣ー￣)//”” i enjoyed it~!

[Cerise]

Thank you..:)