Its always difficult to say goodbye, but life has to move on.
Look at me and say you blame me Just don’t act like the jerk you normally tend to be I am tired of pouring my heart out to you I won’t despise you You are like the amazing flu You don't know how it feels
To see you stare at me
To come back to reality To try and have normality The day you left without a glance Don’t think of me if it’s just a mischance I know you don’t want to hurt me Your promises are all that matters You are my knight in shining armor You were such a charmer I couldn’t live without you I am sorry if I ever hurt you Never meant to offend you Love me like you used to Hug me like we were true Kiss me so strong so that hurt would shy away Miss those precious and amazing day
Which to you were just an easy play True love is so rare And it’s not always fair But that’s why it’s called life You are my solution to a difficult problem Everything looked so fearsome You are that piece of art come out of blue You don’t know what you mean to me Because I am sure then you would never flee My heart and soul will pine for you But I hope life will shine on you I don’t want to say good bye You know I would rather die I don’t want to argue You know I love you All I can say right now isADIEU…
I was in a situation two years ago where there was this guy and I thought I loved him. He left me for another girl after we had already been dating almost a year. He left me for a girl that treats him like crap. I didn't know what to do so I turned to another guy. He was a rebound but I thought I might actually like him. He was controlling and he cheated on me 3 times in 1 month. I was broken again. I broke up with him and I didn't know what to do after. I just wanted to die. There is this one guy though that I have known for years and he was my best friend and both of those guy's best friend. He was here for me through all of this even though it hurt him because he was in love with me. One day last year he waited with me until my mom could pick my up from the school's football game. We are both in the band. We were walking under a row of lights outside when they all turned off except for the one we were standing under. He spun me around, lifted me into the air, and kissed me. We've been practically inseperable since. We've been dating a year. I know what you are trying to express in this poem because I've felt it....twice. I love this poem. Great job.
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
OH MY GOSH......your love story is one of the best i have heard...and i am so not sorry fro your los.. read moreOH MY GOSH......your love story is one of the best i have heard...and i am so not sorry fro your loss..because at the end of the day you got an amazing partner..am so glad for ya..and i thank you fro sharing such a personal experience..am soo glad you loved my poem..but i loved that liftign in air thing..awwwwww,...i could weep out of happiness..seeing two lovers united....well anywayz the guy who can cheat 3 in a month trust me he is soo not worth ya...:)..Thankyou again for a wonderful love story you shared..:)
You're welcome. I just wanted you to understand that I knew what you were trying to express in your .. read moreYou're welcome. I just wanted you to understand that I knew what you were trying to express in your poem. I love this. I actually have it saved under favorites on my computer so I can come back and read it whenever. :)
12 Years Ago
By the way, I like the amazing flu part. I know everyone else is saying they don't understand it and.. read moreBy the way, I like the amazing flu part. I know everyone else is saying they don't understand it and it doesn't make sense and they want you to take it out but I disagree. I love it. It needs to stay. Do what you want but that is my opinion. When you say amazing flu, I know exactly what you are trying to say. I would leave it in there. :)
12 Years Ago
awww my darling...thankyou fro your such kind words..i wouldnt have removed it anywyaz but your word.. read moreawww my darling...thankyou fro your such kind words..i wouldnt have removed it anywyaz but your words gave me confidence..if i ever doubted removing them am sure i wont now....Thankyou for liking it so much that i actually feel i might have done something good writing this one.......
Goodbyes are always tragic...our hearts sometimes cannot stand the pain and it feels as if we are going to drop dead right there on the spot. But...it gets better. Life moves on, so long as we look at what we do have and what is possible in the future. Well done.
Why did you choose to end every line with "..."? I use it from time to time to denote trailing off, but every single line?
these two lines confuse me:
"You are like the amazing flu…
You don't know how it feels…"
You included a ton of interesting concepts and thoughts on somebody who was special to you. If I were you I would consider using stanzas and really thinking about all of the words in some of the lines, but overall this is a good poem because it states some real-life type things
Posted 12 Years Ago
12 Years Ago
ohh well i was supposed to remove that i soo forgot thank you for reminding.....those two lines...i .. read moreohh well i was supposed to remove that i soo forgot thank you for reminding.....those two lines...i just meant that like a flu being bad.....falling is love may be easy but many a times the guy is a playboy....even though he is bad part of your life you still want him because he knoes hwo to make you feel good..:).,hoep u got lil
12 Years Ago
Okay, no prob.
thanks for clearing that up, when reading it though, it just sounds a little co.. read moreOkay, no prob.
thanks for clearing that up, when reading it though, it just sounds a little contradictory, maybe if you removed the "amazing" I still don't completely understand the second of those two lines. You don't know how what feels?
I was in a situation two years ago where there was this guy and I thought I loved him. He left me for another girl after we had already been dating almost a year. He left me for a girl that treats him like crap. I didn't know what to do so I turned to another guy. He was a rebound but I thought I might actually like him. He was controlling and he cheated on me 3 times in 1 month. I was broken again. I broke up with him and I didn't know what to do after. I just wanted to die. There is this one guy though that I have known for years and he was my best friend and both of those guy's best friend. He was here for me through all of this even though it hurt him because he was in love with me. One day last year he waited with me until my mom could pick my up from the school's football game. We are both in the band. We were walking under a row of lights outside when they all turned off except for the one we were standing under. He spun me around, lifted me into the air, and kissed me. We've been practically inseperable since. We've been dating a year. I know what you are trying to express in this poem because I've felt it....twice. I love this poem. Great job.
Posted 12 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
12 Years Ago
OH MY GOSH......your love story is one of the best i have heard...and i am so not sorry fro your los.. read moreOH MY GOSH......your love story is one of the best i have heard...and i am so not sorry fro your loss..because at the end of the day you got an amazing partner..am so glad for ya..and i thank you fro sharing such a personal experience..am soo glad you loved my poem..but i loved that liftign in air thing..awwwwww,...i could weep out of happiness..seeing two lovers united....well anywayz the guy who can cheat 3 in a month trust me he is soo not worth ya...:)..Thankyou again for a wonderful love story you shared..:)
You're welcome. I just wanted you to understand that I knew what you were trying to express in your .. read moreYou're welcome. I just wanted you to understand that I knew what you were trying to express in your poem. I love this. I actually have it saved under favorites on my computer so I can come back and read it whenever. :)
12 Years Ago
By the way, I like the amazing flu part. I know everyone else is saying they don't understand it and.. read moreBy the way, I like the amazing flu part. I know everyone else is saying they don't understand it and it doesn't make sense and they want you to take it out but I disagree. I love it. It needs to stay. Do what you want but that is my opinion. When you say amazing flu, I know exactly what you are trying to say. I would leave it in there. :)
12 Years Ago
awww my darling...thankyou fro your such kind words..i wouldnt have removed it anywyaz but your word.. read moreawww my darling...thankyou fro your such kind words..i wouldnt have removed it anywyaz but your words gave me confidence..if i ever doubted removing them am sure i wont now....Thankyou for liking it so much that i actually feel i might have done something good writing this one.......
Lots of mixed feelings here,just like a typical break up. I'm finding it hard to imagine amazing flu, it always feels s**t to me! However, I like the way you challenge our usual ways of thinking about things.
Some of the grammar doesn't quite feel right to me: should amazing day be days?and you had never flee be you would never flee?
Posted 12 Years Ago
12 Years Ago
Thankyou for your wonderful opinion...i wll edit..:)
Sounded like a spazz out at first. Then started reaching clarity toward the end. I liked the last part very much. For me, would clean up the middle, but that may take away the relief if the ending. It felt like it was time to say goodby. Not sure if that was by accident or design...? Interesting