The prison

chapter 2!!

A gasp comes up from the audience. I glance over at her parents. Her father’s face is clenched and her mother is resting her head in her hand. They don’t seem too surprised.
I can’t believe it, Maggie, a witch?
She knew. My suspicion was right. I feel so light headed.
That’s why she was so quiet, so unlike herself, and when she was on the bus she was afraid. Maggie was never scared. I should have thought more about it. Both of Maggie's aunts were witches. I want to run towards her but I’m frozen in my spot to shocked to move. I see a bright flash of red hair as she bolts too the back of the auditorium. Her short pink dress is bouncing up dangerously, as her head jerks around.
“Maggie, No!’ I scream, but it’s too late.
I hear the gunfire, and see her limp body fall to the ground. My breath quickens. A dark pool is forming around her skinny waist. Is she still alive? The answer becomes a definite no when I hear another gunshot. A small trickle of blood makes its way down her forehead. My vision blurs with tears. I slump to the ground, shocked by the turn of events. I taste vomit in my mouth and swallow quickly. My vision goes black for a second.
Maggie Pastel, My best friend, is dead.
I see her parents run over weeping over her dead body. Her younger brothers cry too, and her little sister just stands there with a look of horror in her eyes. A relative picks up the little girl up and takes her and the boys away.
“Maggie!” The oldest boy calls out as he is dragged away.
I stand there looking at her dead body, Maggie, Dead? I turn away. A few guards in bright blue uniforms carry her body away. Her parents hug each other, weeping by the dark stain until a guard prods them with his gun telling them to move.
“Are you okay?” A girl next to me asks. She looks like she is about to be sick too.
“Yeah.” I lie.
“I feel so bad for her.” Her voice is choked and she sounds scared. I just nod my head.
I suddenly hear the principles voice again. I don’t care anymore. I don’t want to hear that man’s voice again.
“I’m sorry for the interruption. Now please, do not feel sadness for her. She is a danger to our society!” His voice rings out in the silence. “I will not hear any of you talking about this. Of course that means you feel pity for a monster.” I want to scream at him, but I stay silent afraid of the consequences. He then continues to read off the names, “Raymond Baker: non magical.” It is only a few single claps that break the silence now.
“Ruby Darrow: non magical” A girl beams and hugs her friends. They seem to be remembering the body of Maggie, rather than celebrating with their friend.
“Rose Esterson: magical” I must of heard wrong. Shock. That’s what it is. I’m in shock and I’m hearing things. I sniffle until I hear his voice again.
“Rose Esterson: magical.” My heart pounds. Did he really say that?  There must be some kind of mistake, I’m not magical. I am still rooted to the floor. I stand up slowly. The girl next to me makes a small squeak and jumps away. I try not to, but tears are pouring from my eyes. “I’m not...” I mutter too stunned to even finish my sentence.
“Rose Esterson Please come up to the stage.” The principles voice is stern now.
I am so disoriented. Two large guards come out and take me. I struggle but their grip is firm. I can barely breathe.
“Please!” It only comes out as a gasp though. “Wait, you must have some mistake! I’m not magical!”
I look for my parents, they are silent and wide eyed. My father turns away, and my mother just stares. Her face looks paler than anyones, and my fathers face is bright red. How could they just ignore me? Don’t they love me? Suddenly the fear and confusion turns to anger.
The guards keep dragging me.
”Please! Mom, Dad!” It's no use. I scream.
I am crying out loud now. The guards drag me up the steps onto the stage. My feet sting with pain every time they hit a step. The guards take me behind the stage and tie my hands together. My wrists scream as they tighten bands around them. I sit there weeping hearing nothing. Finally I hear the principles voice again and again I hear clapping and sighs of relief. Why doesn’t anyone care! Someone just died! I want to scream, but one of the guards is looking at me every angrily
It’s a dream wake up, wake up!
The minutes pass extremely slowly. I spend the time mostly crying. And then I hear gasps.
Another Magical. My heart pounds. Who is it?
A few minutes later a  boy is dragged in and tied up next to me.
His brow is furrowed and he looks like he’s concentrating. I almost immediately recognize him as the boy Maggie thought would be chosen. Poor Maggie. Maybe that was her power, recognising who is magical and who is not. I never really realized that every year she did always guess right. I always thought she was just a good guesser. How could I be so stupid? I wipe my eyes trying to hide that I was crying but it’s useless, my eyes are red and puffy. We sit there in silence. The only noise is me sniffling and the people on the other side of the stage.
After a few minutes he looks over at me. Then he looks away. I wonder what power he has.

I can tell the showing is done, because I hear people shuffling out of the room. Where will they take me? Will they kill me? My heart pounds and I start to feel lightheaded again.
The two bodyguards come in with the nurse who injected me for the test.
She is holding two syringes. She no longer looks at me kindly like she did before the showing, she looks at me in disgust. I try to struggle, but the bodyguards hold me down.
She injects the needle into me and the boy next to me. My eyes start to float upward. I fight, trying to keep my eyes from floating upwards. But the battle is pointless.
I try to scream for help but it comes out as a small squeak.
Then it all goes black.

I wake up in a white room. I am not wearing my old clothes, I’m wearing a blue jumpsuit. I examine the room There is nothing but  a glass window. Is this where they will kill me? Or keep me prisoner?
How will I die if I do die? Will they shoot me, drown me, or gas me?
I try not to think about dying. My heart flutters.
I scream and pound on the glass. I want to get out.
“Help!” I scream.
I Slam my body against the glass but it won’t break.
“Let me out!” Then  I hit my head against the glass. A buzz of pain whirrs around my skull, and then i start to get a headache.
I look at the glass and notice a red stain. I want to get out.
Then I feel the hot trickle of blood roll down my forehead.
I want to see my parents again, I want to see Maggie.
I slam my head against the glass again and again. Then on the fourth hit  everything fades.
When I wake up a man in a doctors uniform comes in.
He looks like he’s prepared for surgery.
My eyes widen and i scramble to get away but there's nowhere to run.
“No! Please, no!” I start to cry again. My head is hurting really bad. I reach up and feel blood crusted over a large part of my skull.
“Come with me.”
I ignore him. I run to the farthest corner away.
“We can do this hard way or the easy way, it’s your choice.” He looks too bored to be threatening me.
I don't want to find out the hard way so I follow him.
He leads me through many passageways. Will I die? I look around to see if there is anywhere to run to. But the hallways are crawling with guards and what looks like more doctors and nurses. After I am completely disoriented, he turns and unlocks a door. I enter to see some surgery room.
“What are you going to do with me?”
He Doesn't respond.
“Sit down.”
I do as he says, and I sit. The room has two nurses bustling around, preparing syringes and cleaning tools. My heart pounds.
A team of surgeons come in and put on gloves and surgery masks. They are muttering amongst themselves now.
“What are you doing?” I’m yelling now.
One of the nurses takes out some sort of strange contraption. The surgeons push my squirming body onto what looks like a dentist chair, and strap me in. The nurse attaches the strange contraption to the dentist chair. The other nurse places a sort of mask over my face.
“Breathe normally.” She says calmly. How am I supposed to breathe normally.
The surgeons begin to operate the strange contraption. A strange humming noise begins to come out of it.
“Wait, no!!”  I scream.
I wait for the for the pain. They point it at my wrist. Suddenly a bright blue light comes out of it.
“Please no! Stop!” I yell.
Tears re-blur my vision.

And all the sudden a horrible burning sensation comes from my wrist.
This hurts more than any other thing in my life. I scream so loud this time that it echoes across the room. I start to feel like I’m about to faint.
“Stop no! Go away!” I scream
Tears are pouring down my cheeks. I have to be strong. I hold my breath and stop crying.
Finally when the pain is over I glance at my wrist. On it is a long string of numbers. They branded me? The doctors take me by the wrist and drag me out of the room.
He is holding my branded wrist. I dig my nails into my hand to stop from screaming.
The compound is very confusing. Is It supposed to be designed like a maze? After the first few turns I’m lost.
When we finally reach the right cell he tells me this. “If you escape somehow, you will regret it.”
Not exactly welcoming. I realise my fist to find cuts in the shapes of fingernails.
I only nod and turn around. He shoves me into the cell. The cell is barren except for a few threadbare blankets in a corner and a hole in the ground. The toilet. The whole place smells foul.
When I look up I see a woman with a kind face, and another woman huddled in a corner. The guards walks away swiftly.
She waits until he is gone to speak.
“Here let me see.” She gestures for my wrist.
“I’m fine.” I gulp, holding in tears.
“I won’t hurt you.” I walk hesitantly towards her. I show it to her. I haven’t looked at it very closely. My wrist is swollen and red. The numbers reveal flesh. I quickly turn my head away feeling nauseous. I look over at the woman hunched over in the corner. I wonder who she is.
“Make sure not to touch it too much, or it’ll get irritated.”The woman smiles kindly.
“I guess I should introduce myself. My name’s Gem.”

Reviews

[Trigorin]

Good start, but I'd suggest you make more use of active voice in your writing. A lot of your description and dialogue is very passive, which makes the piece somewhat of a bore to read, which is never a good thing. Your concept is good and you've made good progress here, there's just a little bit of tweaking left for you.

[Luna Valentine]

Thanks for the advice!

[bean60]

Great continuation of the story. I like the story and look forward to seeing where this is going. The only issues I see are still things that can be taken care of with careful editing. One thing I do want to point out: "Rose Esterson: magical." I must of heard wrong. Should be: "Rose Esterson: magical." I must have heard wrong. (I know people pronounce it incorrectly all the time, but it is wrong to say it that way.)