Today. It was not a Fairytale.

Love did not die. When I first realized that I have an unbendable feeling for you breeding inside me, I kept on digging it, to know that it actually exists and that I am not getting bluffed by my own racing heartbeats. I did not get carried away by your charisma. I fell for you because I could see a reflection of my life in your eyes, shining. There was and is only one “you.”

Loving you was never easy. I fought myself, convinced myself, that my love for you will never diminish. I will always love you. With that, I can never deny your love for me too. You loved me more than I ever thought you would. You wanted me more than anyone ever did. You could never afford to let go of me.

But, somewhere down the line came a point when I no longer could afford to hold on to you. I could not feel the happy heartbeats any more. I only heard thumping of hollow muscles. I no longer saw my life glistening in your eyes. I could no longer look over the smallest flaws of yours that made my heart ache. Above all, I could not feel the joy of being with you; appreciate any of your attempts to make things look perfect; acknowledge your desire to stay together. I had nothing more to offer you, not even my existence in your life.

Love did not die. But, I lost it somewhere in the motion of sending it to you. I let go of you. Maybe there will not be a single day when I will be happy without you. Maybe the accident called “love” will never happen to me again. But, I had to pull the chain because the unhappiness of mine would eventually destroy you. In love. Maybe I will regret calling it off. But, if I start to count regrets I will run out of time and fade away with it.

Regret: I allowed you in my life and let you love me. I wish I did not. I wish you did not love me.

Now, I will live without you. Please, you do too.

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

This is a beautiful, painfully sacred whisper of life, of love, of everything the soul longs for on earth. Love that is worth every struggle, every storm, yet sometimes it wanders off into the distant places and we can no longer reach it. This makes me ache deeply.

[Fahmida Mehreen]

Totally in agreement with what you said. When true love fades away, we are only left with an aching heart. And, in such desperate times it is better to let go and to live on. Or else, the end only looms over.

Thank you for reading. :)

[An owl on the moon]

Thank you for sharing. Perhaps I relate too well.

[Jacob Clifford]

Very grounded words. I very much like how thorough this piece is as well as the multiple angles used to show the same thing. Somber and melancholy.

[Fahmida Mehreen]

Thank you. Keep reading.

[Vatsal Rohilla (account..]

A very nice and lovable tale of sorrow. How things alter their course, and how just one moment can make a big difference to life is still something to which we have no answer. It is a fact of profound melancholy that some forces within us are wholly out of our control, and these forces make wonders happen- wonders which can turn over a new leaf, or- as it does here- make one's life worse. Keep writing.

[Fahmida Mehreen]

True love comes with a price. Either happiness or sorrow. Both are prices we have to pay.

[Shabeeh Haider]

Sometimes along the line, the spark diminishes. We do not know why, but unfortunately it happens.
The person who was so important in your life, does not remain so important.
Who is at fault?
Love happened by itself and it drifted away the same way.
We are left with questions but we never have answers.
As you have said in your concluding paragraph, there are just regrets.
"I will live without you. Please, you do to"
This line is enough to shatter dreams and end a person's life.

*shabeeh*

[Fahmida Mehreen]

One line, indeed, does sum it all. Something like, "Been there, done that."
Thank you for the review, Shabeeh.