negative space

your disreputable agony is superfluous
to all the wind chimes that curse your way
their whispered cherished hymns that float
curiously wandering in the black evening
evoking the pestering mosquito
that weakens this brash summer
through the gates of days not passed
but into the safe-haven of self-pity

Reviews

[Isolophobe]

like one large metaphor entwined with belonging adjectives and images that do well to convey the ultimate idea.

[Gazza]

Negative space indeed, well written, would have loved it to be longer.